Green Politics
by theslowpokewriter
Summary: Former anti-mutant organization member Stephanie Park seeks refuge at the X-mansion. She had no idea her neighbour would turn out to be the infamous mutant terrorist Mortimer 'Toad' Toynbee – but he recognizes her. Turns out; he was once assigned to kill her, and it's never too late, is it? TOAD/OC
1. Prologue

**GREEN POLITICS**

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**UPDATE: Fixed spelling errors and also the "-symbol to indicate conversation (as per requested). **

**Pictures accompanying the story can now be found on my deviantart account 'theslowpoke'.**

******Link to a fancy 'Green Politics' folder (remove the ~): **theslowpoke~.~deviantart.~com~/~gallery/40786073

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**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Authors note:** I started writing this story in late 2010. And I'm posting it now because I'm – two years later – finally finished. I've had the plot completely planned for at least one year, but I'm such an occasional writer. I'm rating this story T because there is some mature content but it's not very graphic. I have been using the f-word occasionally and I'm not that good with the rating system so if I ought to up it to M because of the cuss words please let me know!

I should also go out with a **warning about chapter 11** (#10,"Jungle Boogie"), which it has been pointed out to me perhaps has a tad more sexual content than a story with a T should, though in my eyes it's not graphic enough for M. There will be another warning at the start of that chapter.

_Toad is based mostly on the performance of Ray Park in the first X-movie._

* * *

Prologue

**or  
Cleaning up**

The water was turned on, taps squeaking in protest, and the drops made a pattering sound as they hit the cold tile floor.

She stepped in quickly so that she wouldn't hesitate.

When the steaming hot water hit her back she inhaled sharply. She didn't move though, just stood there, ignoring the pain until her skin became used to the heat. She caught a glimpse of the water running down the drain, after that she completely stopped looking down. It had been colored red by her blood.

A couple of minutes later, when the water was no longer burning, it felt cleansing, washing away not only her filth. She started rubbing herself with soap as she let her mind work, and scrubbed every inch with determination. She already felt like she had gotten rid of her doubt, she knew what she had to do. She'd known for a long time, come to think of it. She just didn't want to do it.

When she'd lathered every part of her body something around seven or eight times she was out of soap, so she limped out of the shower, grabbing a towel off the rack. She was heading out of the bathroom, but came to a halt in front of the mirror. She truly and utterly looked like shit. Her upper lip had swollen to almost twice its size, and her right cheekbone was bruised, making her flinch when she touched it. Perhaps there was a crack in it. Blonde hair lay plastered along her cheeks, looking much darker now than when it was dry. At least she'd gotten the most of the blood out of it. There had come a ridiculous amount of blood once her lip split.

She'd never really gotten a good beating before - in spite of her occupation - and it was almost fascinating. The marks she now had to prove what she'd been through. On impulse she decided not to take a pain pill; the aching would do her good.

She sighed and left the bathroom. All the way to her bedroom she was whispering to herself, over and over;  
"I'm clean now. I'm clean now."


	2. Run Fay Run

**We'll be heading into the mansion now... so about it:**

**This story is set in a made-up time someplace past the first X-movie, where at least half the second and third movie hasn't occurred (and probably never will). It was a while since I saw the movie and I didn't really remember which people died, so I took an easy way out. Jean, for instance, isn't mentioned at all, and neither is Pyro (though I have him in the Brotherhood in another story I'm working on, so… imagine he's there!). The junior X-men are in their early twenties or late teens, a lot of them still staying at the mansion.**

**So. First chapter!**

* * *

Chapter one

**Run Fay Run  
or  
The Sweet Escape**

* * *

It's hard deciding what to bring from home if you know you're never coming back. Especially if it all has to fit in one single bag. Stephanie had been asked that question several times – most often in the version where you only can bring a specific number of items to a desert island - and she'd asked it to herself sometimes for the amusement. Never had she imagined she'd be standing in front of a decision like that one day. At first she thought she'd miss _it all_. She realised she had to think clearer, bring the necessities and only a few things that were important on an emotional level.

After a look around her apartment she realised not much of all the stuff she'd gathered up over the years really meant something. She wouldn't be missing a lot of it. She decided to bring her new satin sheets, because they were expensive and pretty and because she hadn't gotten the opportunity to use them yet. She moved on to her bathroom, collecting some sanitary products and the beauty products that felt too exclusive to leave behind. That was probably the answer, she realised bitterly as she was gathering her jewellery in a small box; the things she didn't want to leave were the expensive ones.

_I've grown so materialistic it's embarrassing_, she thought as she put the box in a bag along with her laptop.

Standing at her bookshelf, Stephanie realized she probably was supposed to bring a photo. _That's what non-materialistic people bring when they have to leave home, a photograph of their loved ones_, she reasoned.

So she picked up a family photo, of her parents, her brother and her, and tried to fill herself up with love for them. But it was hard; her ankle hurt too much, her face hurt too much, her ribs hurt too much. She hurt in more places than she wanted to think of. Her fingers lingered on the bright yellow back of _Clearance – the dream of a mutant-free America_ but she never grabbed it. She couldn't bring it along.

It was hard for her, walking away from that bookshelf with only a photo that didn't raise a satisfactory level of love in her hands, leaving the yellow book. She'd been telling herself how much she hated it all and that she'd leave it all behind the past hours, but it felt strange abandoning a belief she had clung to so hard for so many years.

Nevertheless; she would abandon the book. That she had to do.

The space that was left in her bag she filled with as many items of clothing as she could fit, and then she started to get dressed. From the trail of blood running down her thigh she understood she was still bleeding, so she put a sanitary towel in her panties before she put them on, wincing as she did so.

_Stop being such a baby, suck it up. _Obeying her own command, she finished dressing without a noise. She threw the bag over her shoulder and had a last quick look around what had been her home the last few years. She couldn't bring her cell phone. She knew what kind of contacts they had. Despite of the cell, was there anything at all left that she'd miss? Her eyes scanned the room.

Forty-seven minutes after Stephanie entered her apartment, limping and covered in her own blood, she stepped out. She was only carrying a sports bag, a pillow and a pot plant. She felt renewed, like she had a mission now - a future.

Still limping though but, overall, renewed.

* * *

She was scared half to death when she finally stood in front of the iron gates. It hadn't been hard getting there, just a train and then a bus. The last bit she'd been forced to walk, but she'd managed without enormous difficulty. It'd been less than a mile so it was bearable, even though she'd been limping all the way. She'd flung her sports bag over one shoulder; put her pillow under her right arm and the pot plant in a firm grip against her chest with her left. A part of her felt that if she accidentally dropped the pot she'd probably lie down beside the scattered pieces and dirt and just die there beside it. She still wasn't sure if that was what she wanted, so she pressed the plant even tighter to her chest and took a deep breath. In her head she was replaying the phone call she'd made from a phone booth shortly after she'd left her apartment.

Most of it was a blur, because at the moment she'd been glancing over her shoulder time and time again, positive each time that she'd se a familiar face and that she'd be forced to make a run for it. But she recalled the voice on the other line falling silent once she reminded it that it had offered her help one time and that she now truly needed it.

"When I offered my help you didn't seem very obliged to accept it, Ms. Park," it had finally said.

It hadn't sounded accusing, simply curious.

"I'm sorry about my earlier behaviour Professor, I truly am," she'd whispered between quiet sobs, "but certain events have given me a new angle to look at things from."

"You mean it's not quite as fun when you yourself are taking the punches, and not a mutant?"

The voice hadn't really sounded mocking; it had just softly stated a fact. At this point she had felt a strong urge to start crying for real, but she'd stifled it.

"I need help, Professor," she'd said, forcing her voice not to quiver, "and you're the only one who can protect me. I want to change, I really do. And even if you don't believe me, I think I can be of great help to you."

"And why is that?"

"I know things. Valuable information. Please, Professor."

"If you so easily would desert your own society, what gives me reason to trust you?"

"Please. One meeting. I desperately need your help."

"Very well, Stephanie. Come to the mansion and we'll have a talk."

And now here she was, finally at the goal destination. She was afraid to move. She'd heard about the place, of course she had - she'd been told it was the god damn Mecca for mutants. She'd thought of it as The Headquarter of Freaks and she'd despised it. She never would have figured she'd one day stand outside of the gates, too scared to walk in, but still praying in every single cell that the inhabitants would help her. Protect her and let her stay there.

Quite idiotic, all of it, she thought as she slowly limped towards the intercom, never releasing her grip on the pot plant even the slightest. How petty some opinions could seem - even the ones that were so important you formed your whole life around them - once you'd experienced degradation and a good beating.

They let her in, and she limped up the long driveway towards the giant mansion. It was getting quite late - the sun was almost setting - otherwise she probably would've seen a bunch of mutant kids practicing their different abilities on the estates. She was relieved by this, though she probably should start getting used to it. Heck, she'd force herself to get used to it even if the Professor wouldn't help her. She would learn to accept and not be so prejudiced and narrow-minded. It felt like she'd wasted a lifetime on being narrow-minded.

The Professor met her in the doorway, a dark-skinned, white-haired woman by his side. Stephanie instantly recognized her as Storm, the weather witch. There where posters and descriptions of her everywhere at the Headquarter. Everyone said she was extremely dangerous. She didn't quite fit the descriptions, not the way Stephanie could see her now. Though she did look strange with her white hair, she did not at all look like a freak. In fact, she was stunningly beautiful. _She can probably pull of a bruise way better than me with that complexion_, Stephanie thought bitterly, forcing herself not to finger her own swollen skin.

Storm's eyes were filled with concern when she took in Stephanie's appearance. It didn't feel good at all to be pitied, so Stephanie avoided the woman's eyes and limped the few steps up to the entrance.

"Thank you for seeing me, Professor Xavier," she said, meeting the crippled man's eyes.

He nodded and smiled.

"Let's step in to my office. If I feel we can trust you, I'm sure we can help."

Feeling only the slightest bit reassured, Stephanie followed the man in the wheelchair and the white-haired Storm through the mansion. As they passed through hallways and endless set of doors, Stephanie felt a tingling sensation in her head. As if someone carefully picked at the surface of her brain. She'd heard about the Professor's abilities, so she wasn't surprised. Though it did make her quite a bit uneasy.

Of course it was the thoughts she wanted to think about the least that started running through her mind when she realized what was happening. Painful memories of events she rather would keep pushing deep down until they never returned again.

The Professor's face didn't change while flashing images of someone hitting her over and over again appeared inside her head. He didn't react when the memory of that person gripping a heavy lamp and raising it popped up. But when her unwilling thoughts went to the worst scene, the one where she was lifted up and violently thrown on a bed, crying and kicking but not being able to keep that horrible, all too familiar person away, she suddenly felt the light touch vanish from her head.

She looked up in surprise and met the Professors eyes. The look he gave her was filled with enormous grief and compassion. Not only for her, she realized, but probably for all the people suffering by the hands of violence.

_I'm sorry for what you've been put through, Stephanie_, his voice whispered in her mind.

She nodded and pursed her lips together to keep herself from crying.

The meeting in Professor Xavier's office went quite fast; afterwards she realized he'd probably made up his mind about helping her as soon as he'd seen the images from the rape flickering through her brain. He probably realized she had several reasons of wanting to stay far away from The Clearance Society and her former friends.

She willingly gave him every bit of information she knew, and after every revelation she could feel him prodding around in her brain until he knew she'd told the truth. He was very good at it actually; it went as fast as a snap of one's fingers. One quick dive into her mind, and then he nodded and smiled.

Seeing as Stephanie once had been high in the ranks of The Society - or at least high by the standards for a woman; they were extremely outdated in many areas and most of the members held a very strong opinion that a woman should 'know her place' – she certainly had some valuable information. And she gladly gave it to the X-men, the thought of endless ambushes and slaughter of mutants had started to make her sick to the stomach.

Once she had thought they were using all the violence for a Higher Cause, but when she realized that several of the attacked mutants were innocent, she'd started regretting her way of life. Some of the victims had been young – far too young - and somehow the ones who looked the worst where treated the worst, despite how they acted or what they'd done.

So she willingly told Xavier and Storm everything about the plans for ambushes, one of the more extreme being a bombing of a mutant orphanage in France that they'd planned for the spring. She even told them the exact address of the Headquarters and the storage room by the harbor where they kept weapons. She gave them a description of where the science labs where, what kind of experiments they were doing and how far they'd gotten.

The most important thing she told them, something that made Storms eyes grow large and the Professors lips curl into a small, but triumphant smile, was where they kept the mutant prisoners they'd collected over the years. Most of them hadn't done anything, they were kept for medical experiments or simply because they had an excessive mutation. The location of this illegal prison had been such a well-kept secret that the X-men hadn't found it even after years of searching. She knew they'd want to help all the prisoners, also the ones they didn't even know. Somehow that insight reassured her that she'd done the right choice.

"Thank you so much, Stephanie!" Storm whispered and grabbed her hands. She actually had tears in her eyes.

This made Stephanie feel very uneasy.

"It's nothing at all compared to all the horrible things I've done."

Professor Xavier smiled towards her at this.

"Well, my dear, I think these actions are a good start on the way to redemption. This information has been priceless! And I know the cost of revealing things like these; we'll help you stay safe from The Society."

Stephanie was filled with great relief.

"Thank you, Professor."

He smiled reassuringly.

"I think we'll let you stay on the east wing. It's quite shielded from the rest of the mansion, but I believe that would be the best choice in your case. I'm sure both you and some of the students will feel scared or threatened at times, and perhaps we should ease in to the situation."

"That sounds great, Professor. Thank you again."

"Ororo will show you your room."

Stephanie shot a surprised glance at Storm, assuming he was talking about her. She smiled, still teary-eyed, and turned towards the Professor.

"I'm so glad, Charles," she whispered. "I've been worrying sick about those people. And Mortimer, not least."

Professor Xavier raised his eyebrows.

"Mortimer, Ororo?"

She nodded.

"I've done a check-up on his background - and it's not one that produces saints. To tell the truth, he's had a horrible life. No wonder he chose the path he did. Ever since I found out I've felt awful about what I did to him."

"Well, I can vaguely recall that he trapped you in an elevator shaft at that occasion, didn't he?"

Ororo shook her head.

"I truly believe we could help him, Charles. Help him to heal his mind. He really deserves a chance; I don't think anyone's ever given him one."

The Professor nodded after contemplating her words for a moment.

"Well, there's no harm in asking his opinion. After all, he no longer has Magneto to return to. We'll have a meeting tomorrow with the X-men, so we can start establish a release plan for the prisoners."

"Wonderful, Charles. Now," Ororo finally said, turning to Stephanie, "let me show you where you'll be staying."

Stephanie bade goodnight to the Professor and then followed the white-haired woman through the mansion. She was far too relieved that she was finally safe, or as safe as she could possibly get, to think about the conversation between the Professor and Ororo. But even if she had, she would have never been able to predict what surprises the time ahead of her held.

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**Reading this through I realize it's kind of weak. But it does get better, and Toad is in the next chapter. I'm posting it immediately, so keep reading!**


	3. Can't Hardly Stand It

**I know I'm supposed to have some time between the posts… But I thought you should get to meet Toad so that you'd get at least a bit interested. After this I'm going to bed, and I'll update sometime before next Sunday. ****Please R&R!**

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Chapter two

**Can't Hardly Stand It  
or  
A new neighbor**

"Sugar?"

Cat's eyes were on the verge of falling shut, and her voice was drowsy due to her newly-awoken state. A teaspoon to the brim filled with sugar was balancing in her hand about four inches above Stephanie's cup of coffee.

Stephanie coughed loudly to prevent Cat from forgetting about the teaspoon, or about being awake, really, and just falling asleep on the kitchen counter. Cat's eyes snapped open by the sudden sound, involuntary spilling the sugar into – and quite a bit outside of - the cup. Stephanie smiled.

"I don't think I have a choice anymore. So yes, please."

Cat grinned sheepishly and handed her the cup of steaming coffee. Stephanie grasped it with both hands and inhaled the scent while watching her neighbor. It hadn't taken long at all to get used to her mutation, truth be told it wasn't even noticeable all of the time. Right now though, when the morning light was streaming in through the large windows on the opposite wall of the kitchen, it was quite easy to spot.

Cat's pupils were thin as slits while she reflectively stared through the windows, not blinking for a disturbingly long time. In an effort to make her blink Stephanie abruptly broke the silence.

"Why were you up so late anyway?"

Cat turned her feline eyes towards Stephanie and – score – blinked.

"What? Oh. Well, my mutation has a downside. I sat up studying for this test in geography and I didn't even notice it getting dark."

She yawned widely and started pouring herself a bowl of cereal.

Stephanie and seventeen-year old Catherina Fall were for the moment the only ones living in the east wing. It consisted of a fairly big living area with combined living room and kitchen, and five bedrooms. Apart from that there were two bathrooms - the bigger one had a shower and was also used as a laundry room. In the smaller one there wasn't much more than a toilet and a sink, if you didn't count the small cabinet above the sink and some shelves.

The two girls had most things one would need, and everything else could more often than not be found somewhere in the mansion. Stephanie and Cat ate most meals at the cafeteria, which was on the ground floor, but often they scraped together some breakfast from what could be found in the small kitchen and ate it peacefully in their own little isolated corner of the mansion.

It hadn't even gone a month since she moved in to the bedroom next to Cat's, but Stephanie was already getting used to it all. From what she'd put together the east wing was the X-mansions living area for "special cases". It could be compared to the classes in schools where they put the ADD's, ADHD's, and the kids that for no particular reason couldn't stop beating up other kids during breaks. Of course, a mutant equivalent of a kid with ADHD probably should be handled with a tad more consideration, seeing as they could cause a lot more damage if they got upset. The residents of the east wing were somewhat separated from the others and could, if necessary, be more closely monitored than if they'd lived with the other kids.

Stephanie was guessing her reason for being there was so that she wouldn't freak out if she bumped in to mutants with severe mutations. And probably so that the kids wouldn't freak out either if they recognized her from newspapers and television. She'd been in the spotlight promoting the Society and their opinions a couple of years ago.

As for Cat… well, Cat had been moved to the east wing a couple of months earlier. The reason was pretty clear, and Stephanie had noticed it right away when some of her valuables disappeared. She'd found them underneath Cat's bed. On top of her mutation, Cat was also suffering from severe kleptomania. But they still got along well.

Stephanie glanced at the clock on the wall.

"When does your morning class start?"

Cat shrugged.

"Not sure. Thinking about skipping it, I'm so god damn tired."

"What's the subject?"

"Math, and Professor Summer's cool. He wouldn't make such a fuss about it."

Stephanie wasn't mostly very up-to-date with the X-men's current affairs, but this day she knew what they were up to. Simply because she was the only reason for them knowing where to send their rescue operation.

"Scott can't be teaching, the X-men are going off to the CS headquarters today," she pointed out calmly.

Cat gasped, eyes widening in terror.

"Oh no!"

She let her spoonful of cereal clink down into the bowl, scrambled off the bar stool and ran to her bedroom to fetch her schoolbag.

"Who's Scott's substitute teacher?" Stephanie yelled at her back when Cat ran by her towards the exit.

Cat turned in the doorway, out of breath and with her feline eyes wide open.

"Ms. O'Callaghan," she whispered - her body stiff by fear for a moment. Then she shrugged it off and ran for her class.

Stephanie had been told about the small woman earlier. She had a very short temper with her students, and her mutant ability of being able to raise her voice until it made the walls vibrate was a very effective way of keeping the student's attention on the black board.

Most of the students were scared half to death by her. She couldn't help chuckle a bit thinking of the scolding that awaited Cat while she picked up her cup and took a sip. She brought it with her when she headed for Cat's room.

She found most of her jewelry in the younger girl's nightstand; her perfume under Cat's pillow and for some strange reasons her pot plant in the closet. When she'd scanned the room thoroughly she headed back to her own room to put her things back.

It had become a sort of morning routine to search Cat's room for her stuff, and she didn't mind very much. It kept her mind busy, and she always took the time to clean up a bit in Cat's room so that she'd know Stephanie had been there and that she wasn't mad. They had a silent agreement never to discuss this daily exchange of Stephanie's belongings.

* * *

Stephanie spent the rest of the morning with Professor Xavier in his office, discussing her options for helping out at the school. It turned out the school was lacking a swimming instructor, and since she'd competed during younger years she knew a bit about some techniques.

She agreed to help out; after all it'd make living at the mansion and being protected by all of the X-men cling less to her conscience. Come to think of it she'd probably feel strange trying to instruct the kids who could breathe under water or even control it. And she wasn't sure what kind of technique was the most appropriate for those who had webbed feet. But she'd make it work.

She was actually feeling relived when she headed to the cafeteria for lunch, and she spotted Storm sitting at a table with some of the X-men. They were still wearing their uniforms, apparently recently returned from their mission and too hungry to change before lunch.

Ororo spotted her and waved.

"Stephanie! Come sit down!"

Stephanie hesitated but then obeyed. The X-men probably wouldn't like her better if she refused Ororo's offer.

"How'd it go?" She asked while putting her tray of food down next to Ororo and sitting down.

Storm's smile widened, and even some of the others at the table started smiling satisfactory.

"We got 'em all!" Rouge stated.

She was fiddling with the plastic cover of a straw, and having quite some difficulties managing it with her gloves, but she didn't seem to notice.

Scott took a swig of his drink and nodded, a wide grin on his face.

"And a minimum of injuries also, no one got severely hurt. Kurt got grazed by a bullet during our escape, but that's about it, leaving out some scrapes and bruises."

Stephanie felt utterly relieved they hadn't been hurt. She didn't want that on her conscience, and for the record the survivors could have thought she'd set them up, or something along that line.

"How many were there?"

"Seven," Wolverine muttered down his soda can, "four of them were just kids."

Stephanie nodded, biting her lip. Wolverine always seemed repellent to meet her eyes.

She guessed it had something to do with the medial attention she'd gotten a few years back. Quite a few of the mutants living at the X-mansion had seen the posters, and the interviews on TV, and Logan was one of those who remembered her place in them and had a hard time letting that fact go.

She didn't blame him.

"Any one of them hurt?"

"One of them," Ororo said, "there was a boy named Philip Smith with the ability to turn various matters in to stone. Apparently some scientists at the facility forced him to try and use his powers on one of the other captives, a woman named Elizabeth. Her whole left arm is petrified, but she's down at the infirmary right now. Beast is positive we'll find a cure."

"They did some experimenting," Scott added, "shady, all of it, but it doesn't seem like any of the others will suffer any permanent harm."

Stephanie nodded, feeling sick to the stomach for a moment. She stifled the feeling and forced herself to start eating. She was out of the CS now, and she hadn't known about these horrific details even when she wasn't. But she still knew she'd been a part of it all once, and it filled her with shame. The X-men started chatting again, excited over their success and some of them still smiling ear to ear.

When Stephanie had finished her lunch she told the X-men she should get back to her room and rose to leave. She had only taken a few step when Cyclops seemed to recall something and called after her.

"Hey, Stephanie!"

She turned around.

"Yes?"

"You're the new swimming instructor, aren't you? Professor X mentioned it."

She nodded.

"Well, watch out for Rebecca. She's this little blond kid… well, you'll recognize her. She can heat up the area around her, so if something happens and she gets upset the pool will probably start boiling."

Stephanie turned a shade paler.

"I'll look out for that."

Scott flashed a white smile.

"Yeah, wouldn't want to scorch the kids, now would we?"

The other X-men laughed as he turned to sit down, apparently protecting the children from each other's mutations wasn't a dead serious matter for them. Probably they'd been through worse.

But Stephanie couldn't really ease around the thought of a bunch of children getting boiled alive during her watch. In fact she hadn't even considered the children being dangerous at all, which she definitely would have a few months earlier. Perhaps that was a good thing, that she was getting rid of her prejudices. Yet the thought of all that responsibility, and also this new assignment to protect them from each other - when she herself didn't even have any sort of special mutant powers - made her quite a bit jittery.

Walking up the stairs she felt the nervousness slowly ease itself down her stomach and take stronghold. By the time she'd turned left and was walking down the hallway towards the living area of the east wing she was playing wild scenarios over and over in her head. Some kid accidentally turning the pool water in to fire which consumed all the others, or someone turning in to a shark and then losing control and letting the animal's instinct take over. She wasn't sure how the children could control their mutations. Or what they could do.

_Would Professor Xavier hold me responsible for the deaths if they occurred? He probably would. Jesus Christ._

Looking back at the event it was easy to understand why Stephanie wasn't in the calmest of moods when she entered the living area. But who's to say she wouldn't have reacted the same way even if she was?

There wasn't much off in the area, most of it looked the way it had when she left for her meeting with Professor Xavier the same morning. Nothing was broken or moved.

No, the biggest problem with the sight that met Stephanie's eyes that moment was that it included a green man.

He was reclined in the sofa, hands behind his head and lazily watching the television with yellow eyes. He was wearing ordinary clothes, grey sweatpants and a zip hoodie with the X-men logotype on them. But, as earlier mentioned, his skin tone was not ordinary. Everything that wasn't covered by the clothes, from his bare feet to his neck and his face, was completely green. Green people aren't that usual, and since Stephanie didn't have that much experience with mutants you could understand her shock.

Yet this was not even the reason for Stephanie's shock. No, truth be told, Stephanie had heard of green men before. In fact, she knew a lot about one green man in particular, and she was furthermore pretty sure that man was the only green man to be found in the United States.

All this made her draw the conclusion that the man in the sofa, who's yellow eyes had risen to meet hers with expression changing from curiosity to recognition and surprise, was no other than Mortimer Toynbee, also known as 'the Toad', the infamous and extremely dangerous mutant terrorist and assassin.

"Dear god," she whispered, every single thought wiped clean from her head except the one about the terrorist sitting less than 15 feet away from her.

"I know 'bout you," the mutant said slowly, rising from his position to sit up leaning on his knees with his elbows.

His eyes were sparkling maliciously.

"You… you're… dear god.! Stephanie was stuttering and slightly quivering now.

"_Stephanie Park._ Ye've been standin in the fron' line, demonstratin 'gainst mutants, haven't ye?"

A British accent could now clearly be heard in his speech. He rose to stand, and started to walk towards Stephanie.

"You're Mortimer Toynbee," she whispered through stiff, pale lips.

"I am, love, I am. Think I saw ye at one of 'em demonstrations. 'T was about _compulsory castration of all mutants. _Hm."

He emphasized the words, and she could without difficulty remember that day in front of the City Hall. Their banners, their t-shirts and chants. Their disappointment when the bill was dejected…

He had come close now, and was standing just a few feet away from her. She was terrified, of course, all horror stories she'd ever heard about mutants (and she had heard quite a few) coming to life in the figure in front of her.

His eyes shone bright yellow as he caught her gaze, an ironical smile playing on his lips. He leaned in closer, his cheek brushing hers as he whispered in her ear, and the hair on the back of her neck stood up.

"Wouldn't want us all reproducin' now, would we love?"

She couldn't think of anything to say, and even if she had she wouldn't have dared uttering the words. She didn't even dare moving, or breathing.

When no reply came, he snorted and leaned back.

"Nice talkin' to ye, Steph. Ought t' do this another time."

With that, he turned and walked towards his room. In the doorway he stopped and turned to her. She hadn't left the spot; in fact she was still working up the courage to start breathing again.

"Oh, and if ye were wonderin' why I knew ye're name, it's 'cause I was ordered t' off you a couple o' years ago. Things got in the way though. Shame. Well, 's never too late, now is it?"

He went in to his room and closed the door behind him. Stephanie stood glued to the spot, completely still. After a while she drew a shaky breath and shortly after started wondering if her legs would work if she tried moving them.

**Let me know what you think! Next chap'll be up soonish.**


	4. Little Green Man

**Story fun fact:**In its state at the moment, this finished story consists of 25 parts - 23 chapters, one prologue and one epilogue. The word count right now is about 56 000 words.

Wow. How fun was that?!

Here's chapter three.

* * *

Chapter three

**Little Green… Man  
or  
Friends making friends**

Eventually Stephanie had been able to move herself all the way back to her room, and after shutting and locking it carefully she picked the pot plant of the windowsill, crept into her bed and sat there for a while hugging the cool clay almost desperately. The pot plant did help a lot actually. Somehow it had become a source of nice, simple memories of the life she'd once led, leaving out all the parts she didn't like thinking of.

Seeing the plant before her on its old place, on the sill of the window facing the street in her old apartment, she'd come to think of those time she did normal, everyday things. Things like doing the laundry, grocery shopping and going out for walks in the mornings.

She succumbed to these calming memories for a while, until they led to the thought that she'd been planning to by a pet; a dog or a cat, perhaps just a fish. That thought immediately reminded her that she didn't have a home anymore, that she didn't lead a normal life anymore and probably never would be able to again. And inevitably those thoughts led to others, mostly about the lethal assassin who was now her neighbour and who had just recently threatened to kill her.

She scrambled out of bed and started flipping through a pile of magazines Cat had given her with her one free hand. She desperately needed to start thinking about something other than death and murder.

When Cat knocked at her door announcing it was dinner time she was working her way through her seventh number of Cosmo and had almost, _almost_, erased the death-and-murder thoughts from her consciousness. She still had one arm around the pot plant, but every now and again her arm had started to fall asleep, so she had been switching sides back and forth.

_Kind of like a baby_, she thought, somehow feeling satisfied by that, and cradled it in her left arm while she went to open the door.

Cat looked at her firm grip on the pot suspiciously but then seemed to decide that Stephanie was sane enough to understand her.

"Dinner," she repeated, apparently not wasting words, "coming?"

Stephanie nodded, glancing at her imaginative baby.

"Let me just put down my plant."

She put it back on the windowsill - surely it had gotten enough cuddling for the time being - and followed Cat. On her way out she nervously checked if the green mutant was anywhere to be seen, but the door to his room was still closed and he was presumably in there, doing god-knew-what.

She relaxed slightly and when they finally got out of the living area she took a deep breath. She turned to Cat.

"Did you meet him?"

They passed a window, and the strong evening sun made Cat's eyes to slits for a couple of seconds as she turned to look at Stephanie.

"Who, Mr. Green Man? Yeah, quite easy to spot, in' he?"

They got out of the light and the pupils of Cats eyes started growing until they were round and fairly normal-looking once again.

Stephanie nodded, still a bit shaken up and unable to smile at the irony in Cat's voice.

"He's a terrorist."

Cat raised an eyebrow questioningly.

"Really?"

"Yeah. His name is Mortimer Toynbee, but I think he's more known as 'the Toad'."

Cat froze mid-step.

"You're kidding me! That was Toad back there?"

"So you've heard of him?"

"Of course I have! He's in the Brotherhood… or… well, I guess he _was_ since he's apparently here now."

They started walking again.

"Well, that's not all of it. He told me he'd been ordered to murder me some years ago, but something had gotten in the way or something like that - I didn't get it all since I was scared half to death at the moment."

Cat shrugged.

"To be honest that's not surprising. Weren't you on the peak of the dark side at that time?"

To ease on their conversations Cat and Stephanie had decided on the expression 'the dark side' whenever discussing Stephanie's past. Like everything else in their everyday life it had been working out surprisingly well.

"I mean," she continued when Stephanie hadn't answered, "who didn't wanna kill you back then?"

Stephanie went silent and Cat seemed to assume she had offended her. She started apologizing when Stephanie interrupted her.

"It's okay, I get it. But still, he's an assassin. A terrorist. He's probably psychotic. He said 'it's never too late'. How should I interpret that?"

"Probably like he still wants to snap your neck."

Stephanie shuddered.

"I hate it when you're answers are that specific."

Cat didn't answer, just flashed her a wide grin.

Stephanie had been hoping desperately for Ororo to be down in the cafeteria - so that he could ask her about the assassin living in the bedroom next to hers. There was no such luck; Ororo was nowhere to be found, and the only other X-men she could see was Wolverine and Kurt, who were off in a corner and chatting energetically. Or, at least Kurt was, talking in a strong German accent and gesticulating considerably whenever he got to something he felt was meaningful. Wolverine looked like he was focused only on his food and blocking out the constant flow of words from his fellow X-man.

Stephanie didn't feel like bringing up the subject with either of them – after all she and Wolverine weren't the best of friends, and she always felt a bit nervous around Kurt. There was something about him being called the Nightcrawler, and definitely some of it had to do with the tail. She didn't feel comfortable with the tail. Probably something she should be working on, but not at the moment.

She and Cat got a tray with dinner each, and then sat down with some classmates of Cat's. There were five of them, Sandra and Mariah, and two boys and a girl whose name Stephanie didn't know.

Stephanie and Cat mostly sat alone whenever they went to the cafeteria together, so Stephanie didn't quite understand why Cat chose the table until she started speaking.

Apparently she'd wanted to spread the word.

Cat slammed down her tray and happily jumped into her seat, whilst Stephanie made a bit calmer entrance. Cat opened her mouth to start a conversation long before the other kids had gotten the time to react - let alone say hello.

"So, anyway, we've gotten a new addition to our little east wing-family."

Sandra, a nineteen-year-old who had the somewhat useless ability to change the colour of her own hair, eyes, skin and nails, immediately became curious.

"Another special-case? Who? Is it someone from the lot they picked up from that CS building?"

Her hair was actually zebra-patterned that day, something that impressed Stephanie so much that she almost forgot to feel scared by the mentioning of the assassin. Cat's grin was wide.

"Check this: it's Toad."

They all gasped.

"No way!" Mariah said. "_The_ Toad? Didn't Storm blast him that time at the Statue of Liberty?"

"Well apparently he survived it?" Cat replied smugly.

"That is _so _cool!" One of the boys said. "Is he dangerous?"

"Well… he threatened to kill you Steph, didn't he?"

Everyone at the table turned to look at Stephanie, and she felt utterly uncomfortable. Which she shouldn't; she had some years advantage on the teenagers, and should feel mature and safe, but she still didn't like the attention. Or the subject, for that matter.

She shrugged.

"You could say that."

A series of noises erupted at the table, most of them comments like: 'seriously?' 'Wow!' and 'that is _so_ awesome'. Stephanie didn't quite agree and started wondering if she really did like kids after all.

She dodged some questions until the teenagers tired and changed the subject, and when they were finished eating she and Cat headed back to their wing.

She wasn't that happy about returning, but she had promised to help Cat with an algebra assignment, and either way she would be forced to go back to the east wing sooner or later

* * *

Cat threw her books down with a loud thud on the coffee table, and the both of them sat down in the sofa to look at the assignment.

"How'd you end up getting this assignment anyway?" Stephanie asked as Cat started flipping through her book.

Cat made a face.

"It's that stupid Ms. O'Callaghan," she muttered. "Aha! Here it is!"

She'd found a sloppily folded paper between two pages in her book.

"She's all about punishment for being late," she continued, "so I've got to finish the fifteen assignments on this paper by the next lesson. We're doing graphs now."

Cat handed Stephanie the paper and she folded it out.

"Let's see, I hope I can help you out…" she skimmed through the paper.

When Stephanie had glanced over the first couple of assignments she guessed she was just a bit rusty, but the further she got the more confused she got. She didn't understand a thing. She cleared her throat.  
"Um… well, work with what you've got and when you get stuck we'll see if I can help you out."

Cat nodded and grabbed her pen and calculator.

Feeling a whole lot uncomfortable, Stephanie headed for the kitchen to make herself a cup of coffee. She turned on the water boiler and started searching in the cupboard for some instant coffee and a cup. It didn't seem right, her being four years older than Cat and not being able to explain stuff for her. Wasn't that a part of being older than someone? Perhaps she should have gone to college.

"Stephanie?" Cat called, almost immediately.

"Yeah?"

"Here's one. Listen. Y equals five times X minus four. What has that got to do with graphs? I don't get it. Is that an equation?"

Stephanie swallowed hard.

"Um…"

Her brain was working hard, not so much for an answer as for an excuse to leave as soon as possible, but a familiar, condescending voice stopped her thoughts abruptly.

"They don' teach you that at Nazi school? C'mon love, all big boys and girls know somethin' that basic."

Stephanie froze and turned around. Toad had been able to soundlessly get out of his room and he had now sat down on one of the armrests of the couch, shooting a glance at Stephanie before looking at Cat's assignment sheet over her was giving him a surprised look.

"Y is a function of X, and the equation describes the curve. You've got to put the dots out t' be able to see how the line in the curve's goin' to move. If X equals one," he pointed at something on the sheet, "Y equals five times one minus four."

"One," Cat said, still looking at Toad, but this time more as if she was searching for acknowledgement.

"Right." Toad grabbed the pencil from Cat and made a dot somewhere on the paper. "And if X equals two, Y equals-"

"Five times two – ten – minus four – six," Cat interrupted.

Toad nodded.

"And if X equals three Y equals eleven," Cat continued and started scribbling on the sheet.

"And if X equals negative one?"

Cat thought for a moment.

"Then Y equals negative nine."

"Correct. Now connect th'dots and ye've got yer curve."

Cat drew a line on her sheet.

"I get it now! Thank you!"

Toad just nodded and turned to look at Stephanie. She was too surprised about Toads actions to remember to be afraid, but his next line reminded her.

"We neighbors should help each other out, shouldn' we?"

Stephanie's right hand shut around the can of instant coffee, and she pulled it out and put it on the counter. She avoided Toad's eyes, staring down at her hands. The now familiar feeling of fear had started building up in her chest. Was she really supposed to take everything he said as a threat? Perhaps she was exaggerating.

She started to pour herself some hot water and adding the instant coffee, but as Toad turned to help Cat with another problem, she remembered something he'd said.

"Did you just call me a Nazi?" She asked.

Toad looked up from Cat's paper with mock surprise.

"Aren' you?"

"No!"

It was all Stephanie could think of to say, she was that shocked.

"No? Sorry there, love. 's the part about racial cleansin', always confuses me t' think 's the same thing."

Needless to say this left Stephanie even more speechless. She had no urge whatsoever to defend the Clearance Society, or to defend her own part in it, but she still felt offended. And what was the point in explaining for this mutant, this former terrorist, that she no longer had any part in the organization that had held him prisoner until just recently? What did it matter to him?

She wordlessly grabbed her cup and headed back to her room. Suddenly she felt like cuddling her plant again.

"Night Cat," she called over her shoulder.

She could hear Toad scoffing behind her.

* * *

About an hour later she headed out to get a drink of water, assuming the coast was clear. She stopped dead in her tracks when she spotted Toad and Cat through her half-opened door.

They were sitting at the kitchen island now, Cat still bent over her homework and Toad seeming to be cleaning small metal objects with a rag. There was a bunch of shiny objects neatly placed on a towel in front of him.

Stephanie closed the door until only a thin slit to peek through was left. She had the sudden urge to spy.

Cat abruptly put her pen down and looked at Toad. Obviously a thought had just popped into her head.

"Toad?"

Toad didn't look up from his meticulous cleaning.

"Mhm?"

"What do you do?... I mean, besides from being green?"

Toad lifted his gaze to meet Cat's, looking slightly amused. Cat continued, stumbling on her words thinking she had brought up a subject he didn't approve of.

"It's just that I've heard all these rumours… and I don't know what's true. But seeing as you have this reputation you ought to have some kind of awesome power. Wouldn't you?"

Toad shrugged and returned to his metal pieces. Cat, recognizing the dismissal, sagged in her chair and stared down at her paper. She threw one last quick glance at Toad, and that was when he did it.

He turned his head towards the sofas and opened his mouth. Out of it shot a pink, glistening rope. The end of it reached the fruit bowl standing on the coffee table, wrapped itself around a pear, and then it shot back into his mouth. It was over in a matter of seconds.

Cat was gaping at him wide-eyed, and so was Stephanie, even though they couldn't spot her where she lurked behind her door. It was only when Stephanie saw that Toad was chewing on the pear that her brain connected the dots and she realized the pink rope had actually been his tongue. This baffled her in more ways than she could count.

She stood staring at him even when Cat snapped out of her shock and started spitballing questions. When Toad swallowed what was in his mouth and, with a slight smile, started answering as best as he could, Stephanie shook her head without really getting rid of the shock.

She was still feeling very surprised when she headed back to her bead, deciding she wasn't thirsty anymore.


	5. Green Hornet

**Story fun fact: **Although quickly accepting he was green, crazy and that he'd murdered a lot of people, I had difficulties accepting what I kept reading about Toads teeth when I first started writing this story.

I had a minor crush on his character, and even though I accepted, even liked, his other flaws (physical and emotional) I could never picture him with stumpy, yellow teeth. It's probably one of my many flaws as a writer, but I just couldn't get around it. Toad has nice teeth now. Don't hate me for it.

* * *

Chapter four

**Green Hornet  
or  
Cellulites**

That night Stephanie awoke abruptly, sitting straight up in her bed and panting like she'd just run a mile. Images of the dream were still flickering before her eyes, and even though they were slowly melting away she could still remember the theme all too well. It felt as if his rough hands were still crushing her ribs in a grip far too tight, and when she recalled the feeling of his suffocating weight on top of her she felt ill.

She threw her cover aside and scrambled out of her bed, knowing she wouldn't be able to suppress the urge to throw up much longer.

She headed to the big bathroom, since it was the closest, threw herself down on her knees in front of the stool and emptied the contents of her stomach in it. She saw it all happening once again before her inner eye, and then she abruptly closed that door of her consciousness. She shut the lid, flushed, and sat panting with her forehead leaning on the cool porcelain for a moment.

Then she rose on shaky legs and went to wash her face in the sink. As she was drying it off with a towel she heard a voice from the doorway.

"You bulimic or have you jus' caught somethin'?"

Stephanie turned hastily to see Toad in the doorway. He had a towel behind his neck and a bottle of soap in his hand, most probably on his way to take a shower. He was shirtless, but it wasn't until long after she would recall that his chest and stomach had been covered with thin, white lines.

They had looked like scars, she would remember, but it would seem almost unrealistic to her that one person should be able to collect that big an amount of scars.

She had no idea of how long he'd been standing there, but she could guess it was long enough.

_Who showers in the middle of the night?_ She thought, annoyed in spite of herself.

She sighed and put the towel back on a hook next to the sink. She was too tired and nauseated to be able to feel fright.

"Yeah," she said, as she walked past him, "I'm contagious, better stay away."

Stephanie met the next morning feeling better than she ought to according to the events that had passed that night. Somehow she had gotten an eager, exciting feeling in the pit of her stomach, and while she was ruffling through the fridge for some yoghurt she realized it was because her first swimming lesson would be that day.

She'd always felt safe in the water, and knowing she'd be back there in a few hours shrunk away the other feelings. Those of fear, shame - and quite a bit of panic.

She was relaxing slowly as she was peeking behind the milk cartons, and therefore she was caught by surprise when a green hand shot by her face. It caught a carton of orange juice and disappeared again, and she stifled a gasp and turned around quickly.

oad was standing right behind her though she hadn't even heard him open his bedroom door. His hair was ruffled by sleep and there was a pattern of indentations on the green skin of his face from where his pillowcase had been wrinkled. On another person Stephanie would have found it cute. Right now it was just something to add to her list of irritation.

He was standing awfully close.

"Why do you always have to sneak up behind me? And stop that, that's gross!"

Toad, who'd been drinking the orange juice straight out of the carton, stopped and raised an eyebrow. He lowered the carton.

"Puppet, with a whole fuckin novel o' things t'be disgusted by, why pick somethin as simple as drinkin juice out o' th' carton?"

She shrugged irritably. He was still standing less than a foot away from her and it was making her mighty uncomfortable.

"Well I don't know! Probably 'cause it was the first thing to pop into my mind! I'll think of something more peculiar to be disgusted by the next time."

The last part came out more like a hiss than anything else. Her morning had started out so well and now it was ruined.

_God, I hate him._

He stared at her for a second, looking something that couldn't be described as anything other than dumbfounded. Then he seemed to shake it off and leaned towards her.

Stephanie realized a couple of seconds to late that he'd probably just been reaching behind her to put the orange juice back in the fridge. As It were, she was utterly surprised, and she froze from head to toe.

Toad stopped what he was doing at the sound of her breath catching in her throat. He slowly shifted his gaze to meet hers and something he saw in her face made him frown slightly, as if he was going over something complicated in his mind.

With the look of a boy doing an experiment which he's not quite sure will work, he tilted his head slightly and moved his face toward hers. Not really thinking at all, Stephanie lifted her head and faced upwards to meet him.  
He stopped inches from her face, and slowly a grin spread on his lips. His teeth looked very white against his green skin, and Stephanie tilted her head down to look at them, suddenly realizing with horror what she had been doing.

His gum was a dark shade of green.

Toad leaned back, the juice carton no longer in his hand, with the wide smile still intact.

"That's intrestin'," he said, with a tone as if he'd been talking about a show on Discovery Channel - but with a smile too wide for a subject like that, "very intrestin' indeed."

As he turned around to leave his grin faded to a thin smile, but it still looked upsettingly pleased. Stephanie watched him walk out of the door as he left the east wing.

She couldn't quite wrap her head around what had just happened, but she was pretty sure she shouldn't be pleased about the role she just had in the turning of events.

* * *

The swimming hall was underground, and ridiculously big for being so. The mansion had a smaller pool outdoors where the kids bathed in the summer, and she had assumed she would be holding the lessons there.

A small pool could have done it, or at least been possible to get by with, but what Stephanie found herself standing before was nothing close to a small pool.

It was a short course pool, 25 meters of length, with what she could easily see was 12 tracks, as every track was neatly numbered with a sign. Along with the sight of the stands that were covering the entire further wall the impressions were bringing back Stephanie's memories of when she was a competitive swimmer.

Perhaps it was the strong smell of chlorine or the familiar gurgle of the pool filter more than anything else.

She felt safe.

Swimming she couldn't in any way connect with any of the bad things that had been happening her over the last years. Swimming was earlier, before all that. When her parents still were supportive and standing beneath her with their safety net ready for every step she took. When she had friends, loads and loads of friends from different groups with whom she shared different interests.

If she had been feeling the urge to be deep and cultural – because she had had that period – she'd hang with the kids from her theatre group and discuss Moliére or Shakespeare. When she'd been feeling like being superficial, like gossiping or discussing the latest fashion or flirting with guys who were jerks but really hot, she'd hang with the popular girls in her class. And during those days when she was lacking her lust for adventure and that fiery want to experience everything and feel everything as soon as possible, preferably before her twentieth birthday, during those she would retrieve into the comfortable and relaxed friendship of her team mates.

There was no urge to perform anywhere but in the water, outside of it you could joke around as much as you wanted or sit quiet and you'd still be an appreciated part of the team. As long as you did what you could in the water.

Her biggest problems back then had been her grades, or her stupid crushes, or that some band would split up. She hadn't been affected by politics or racist organizations, and she certainly hadn't been threatened to life by assassins.

She had had such an easy life. How perfect things had been back then, she realized, and she hadn't even known. If only she could relive it and she would appreciate it so much more that time.

She sat down on one of the benches of the stand and started tucking her hair in under the swimming cap. The excitement was burning in her chest, the anticipation of getting back in the water made it hard for her to sit still. She got up on her feet and started pacing back and forth, inhaling the wonderful scent of chlorine with every other step.

Her rubber slippers squeaked beneath her feet, and even that sound was something to add to the list of comforting sensory impressions.

She heard the kids coming some time before she saw them, the boys were first. They were joking and laughing and it brought back memories like everything else. The girls came in one big group, whispering and giggling. Stephanie wasn't an expert at ages but she'd put them all in a category of 10- to 13-year olds.

And then, most likely thanks to all the good memories that were flowing through her mind at that precise moment, something amazing happened. Stephanie forgot all about being scared and worried.

She didn't even think of the kids as mutants, which she would have earlier - even if she had worked hard on the way she thought of mutants. Even if she didn't have anything against mutants at all - even if she actually had started liking most of them more than she liked humans - up until that point she had always thought of mutants and humans, of mutants and herself, as two different races.

But now, without reflecting over it the slightest, they were all children to her. Nothing else.

She held a quick speech for the children about who she was and what she had always loved about swimming. She asked them for their names, joked about how it would take years to learn them all because of her hideous memory, and questioned them about their skills in swimming so far. She felt like an ordinary teacher.

The kids got in the water and they warmed up. One kid with webbed feet swam ridiculously much faster than the others. She taught them the finer techniques of breast stroke and the basics of crawling, and at the end of the class they were all getting the hang of it pretty good. They played some games at the end where they could use what they had been learning, and the kids seemed to love it.

It wasn't until after her 90 minutes had gone - when she had ushered the last kid to the showers - that she realized that a part of her had changed now. She suddenly wasn't as scared. She had gotten a bit braver, a bit more open-minded. And that she probably would keep growing this way a bit more with every class. The realization made her proud of herself, a feeling she hadn't felt for a very long time.

Looking out over the water, she spent a minute smiling about this. It was calm now, no longer filled with splashing, laughing kids, and the silence of the hall was almost deafening after the constant sounds since the kids had arrived.

She could go for a swim, or perhaps she could have gone if she hadn't been so tired. She had done some lengths every now and then while the kids practiced by themselves and going from place to place to instruct everyone when they weren't wasn't that much of a rest either.

"I'll be growing as a person but my ass will be getting smaller," she muttered with half a smile.

"Well thank God! 's been an issue on everyone's minds, I'll tell ya. The arse thing I mean."

The voice was dry and unmistakably British and it made her stomach curl. She looked over her shoulder.

Toad was standing in the doorway from the men's showers, looking greener than usual in the fluorescent light. His yellow eyes were very much fixed on her bottom. Stephanie felt her cheeks burning; suddenly wishing she'd wore a full length body suit instead of a one-piece.

She hastily went to pick up her things; she wanted to get the hell away from there. She got her rubber slippers, cap and goggles from the side of the pool and headed for the women's showers, avoiding eye contact.

Humiliation hit her, and only partly because of what he just had said. The other half was from the events of that morning, which she had been trying to erase from her mind.

He had fooled her to think he'd been trying to kiss her, and she had been trying to kiss him back! What had she been thinking? She didn't even want to kiss him for god's sake! It was all so very embarrassing.

"'s not the size, really, as much as the cellulites," he called after her.

At first thinking about accusing him of stalking, Stephanie realized he was wearing swim shorts and had a towel over his neck and that he couldn't have known she was going to be there. He'd just wanted to go for a swim.

She could spot all his scars clearly now, because that was what all those white lines had to be. Some of them were big enough for one to assume he'd been stabbed. Several times. With big knives.

Assassination probably wasn't the safest branch to be working in.

He opened his mouth to say something more and Stephanie rushed into the protection of the women's showers so that he wouldn't get to say it. It felt oddly satisfying, robbing him of a moment to degrade her.

_I'll definitely try to do that more often_, she decided as she grabbed her soap from her locker and headed for the showers.

Turning on the tap, she tried not to think of what he'd said about cellulites.


	6. Twisted Nerve

**Story fun fact**: If you've missed it until now; I've hidden several little tributes to Quentin Tarantino in this story (and when I say 'hidden'...). Mainly because I was in a crazed Tarantino-state when I started writing this.

Ah, who am I kidding. I'm still in a crazed Tarantino-state.

* * *

Chapter five

**Twisted Nerve  
or  
Tequila and some of its consequences**

Stephanie half decided to go eat lunch but promised herself to take a nap first. After leaving her clothes in a crumpled pile on the floor she slid in under the covers and fell asleep immediately.

She ended up sleeping all the way to dinner, recovering from the hours of sleep lost from the night before. Her head was heavy and she felt a bit groggy, but she decided she'd head down to dinner anyway. She pulled on her clothes from the floor, not really caring about her looks at that moment, and headed out the door.

The first thing she saw as she got out was Toad and Cat, chatting on the couch. They had their backs to her. It was somewhat selfish, but she felt betrayed with the casualty Cat treated Toad with. To have a friend, perhaps her only friend, being so nice to someone who hated and threatened her, wasn't that enough to get to feel betrayed?

She gave off a soundless sigh and coughed to get Cat's attention.

Cat turned her head, her face not showing any guilt what so ever.

"Yeah?"

Toad shot her a sideways glance, not seeming to care enough to even look irritated. It was all so extremely awkward.

"Er… I'm… I'm heading down for dinner. Would you like to come?"

Cat shrugged.

"Sure. Later, Mort."

She rose from the couch and headed out of the east wing together with Stephanie.

As soon as they were out of hearing range Stephanie asked:  
"You're calling him 'Mort' now?"

Cat seemed confused by her voice – it must have sounded a bit accusing – but then she seemed to understand and smiled.

"He's not that bad you know. If you'd try and get to know him you'd probably realise he's okay."

Stephanie snorted.

"It's real hard to get to know a guy who keeps firing insults at you the moment you get into the same room as him."

"Maybe you're exaggerating, subconsciously I mean," she added quickly, "I've never seen him act that way you keep describing him. He seems like a nice guy."

"Nice guy? Cat, he killed people!"

Cat looked down at her feet.

"Well, it was only the bad guys, wasn't it?"

Stephanie shook her head.

"It doesn't work that way. Some humans are hideous, we both know that, but there were mutant terrorists who did awful things as well. Perhaps for a good cause, but awful still. The X-men were fighting the Brotherhood for years, once they had to stop them from almost killing half the planet."

"You mean Ellis Island? For one thing, that wasn't half the planet, just the world leaders. And for the other he could have changed, you know? Storm blasted him to bits; that could really change a guy."

Stephanie was about to protest, to say something about how the way he acted surely showed that he hadn't changed much at all, but Cat interrupted her.

"You know what? None of us are going to change our minds right now. Let's talk about something else so this doesn't turn into an argument."

Stephanie found this reasonable, and they talked about her swimming lesson the rest of the way to the cafeteria.

Once there they ran into Ororo and the three of them ate together. The food woke Stephanie up and pulled her out of the grogginess.

"How are things going with Mortimer, Cat?" Storm asked once she'd swallowed a mouthful of her lasagna. "He treating you alright?"

Cat nodded.

"Yeah, he's great. He's been helping me with my math homework and stuff."

"Good! And you, Stephanie? Having any problems with Mortimer?"

There were two reasons for Stephanie's answer to that question. The first one was that Cat really seemed to like Toad. It was probably hard for her, being shielded from the society for her mutation and then being shielded from the mutants because of her condition.

It must have felt nice for her to have another mutant to talk to, and she did really need help with her homework. Stephanie was not the person to help Cat; she'd done awful in school herself.

The other reason was that she realized Toad would probably get to hear it if she complained about him. And letting him know that what he did got to her, or that she was such a coward she had to run to the X-men and tell, that would be like letting him win.

She couldn't let him win.

Because of this she shot away a brilliant smile at Storm.

"Not at all, he's been a delight."

Cat seemed surprised but didn't say anything about it.

* * *

It seemed like the very thing she needed when Storm asked if she wanted to go out clubbing that night.

"I've got the day off tomorrow and it's rare that I have it the same time as any of the female X-men," she explained as she sorted out papers on her desk.

She was doing it standing, her body language clearly telling she wanted to leave the room as soon as possible. She'd asked Stephanie to join her after the dinner.

"Something with the schedules, I guess," she continued after a brief silence while she skimmed through a note, "but it's almost devastating never getting to have a proper girl's night out."

She put the last pile of papers in a drawer and looked up smiling.

"But now Rogue and Jubilee has both gotten their days of tomorrow as well, it was all their idea actually. It's gonna be so much fun! And I think you and me have gotten along quite well, don't you? I'd really like it if you came."

During the flow of words Stephanie had been standing in front of a photo on the wall, letting her mind sink into it while Storm's words only barely reached her consciousness.

It was a picture of a graduation, Storm was standing with the kids and they all had brilliant smiles shining in their faces. So happy, each one of them. And so very much looking like normal teenagers. Yet so many thought they weren't.

When the words had finally processed through Stephanie's head she blinked and turned away from the photo.

"I'd love to, Ororo! God, it's been ages."

Storm raised an eyebrow.

"Well, can't be that long. You've only recently turned twenty-one, haven't you?"  
Stephanie smiled, mischievously.

"Not really my fault now, is it? I can't be blamed for how easy it was to score a fake ID in my hometown."

Storm sighed dramatically as she shut the drawer and headed for the door

"Oh you shouldn't tell me such things, now I might have to report you…"

Stephanie laughed, following at her heels.

"You wouldn't!"

Storm closed the door behind them and winked.

"Not after you've bought me a couple of shots, at least."

"You got it. At what time should we meet?"

Storm thought for a moment.

"Well, the small kids are in bed at half past ten, the teachers left can handle the rest after that."

"Okay," Stephanie agreed, "see you then!"

They parted ways and Stephanie was mentally flipping through her wardrobe before she even reached the end of the hallway.

* * *

She entered the club behind Rogue and Jubilee, who were whispering and giggling. The high heels that she had borrowed from Storm clattered with every step and she felt carefree and quite good-looking. Her hair, her make-up: everything had turned out perfect.

"You go sit down!" Storm shouted over the pulsating house tunes, "I'll get us all drinks!"

Rouge waved at them to indicate that she'd found a table, and Stephanie and Jubilee made their way through the crowd towards her.

The table wasn't very close to the speakers so the music wasn't as deafening. Stephanie sat down, feeling jittery. She had a hard time deciding what she wanted to do first; dance or get smashed. Both options felt so appealing.

Jubilee stretched out in the seat in front of Stephanie and Rogue sled in next to her.

"God, it's been _so _long since we went out dancing, hasn't it?" Jubilee said out loud.

She stretched out her fingers on the table – nails perfectly manicured and painted with a bright pink shade for the evening – and tiny sparks of firework emitted from her fingers.

"Should you be doing that in here?" Stephanie asked worriedly, casting a glance around them. "Maybe we shouldn't draw attention to us, I mean."

"I like your caution," Rouge nodded while she slid of a glove from one of her hands, "but no one's going to notice some small bursts of light in here, the place's full of it."

Stephanie noticed the different spotlights in the club and relaxed.

"I guess you're right."

"Anyway," Rouge continued, the complicated procedure of dragging her glove of finally finished, "I'm really getting the hang of Jube's powers. Check this out!"

She lightly touched Jubilee's arm with two fingers, scaring the hell out of Stephanie after everything she'd heard about Rogues powers. But after no more than a couple of seconds she let go and started toying with tiny sparks.

"Haven't gotten any time to practice outside yet, but when I get there'll be much bigger fireworks than this!"

Jubilee laughed as Rogue with a concentrated face started throwing the spark from one hand to another. When it was in the air Jubilee caught it with one hand and put it out.

"Gotta learn to crawl before we can run, right honey?"

Rogue snorted but then started to laugh.

"Okay, maybe I'm not _that _good yet."

They all giggled a bit and then Storm returned with their drinks.

"I got mojitos! But_ first_-" she interrupted when everyone reached for a glass "- everyone has to do two tequila shots each!"

She lifted them all off the tray. Stephanie gulped her first shot down before any of the others even had time to react.

Later on she would have a hard time remembering most of the events from that night. She recalled two conversations – one at their table were Storm shared how she somehow really liked Kurt (Rogue had started to giggle and couldn't seem to stop which had really pissed Storm off), and one in the ladies room were Jubilee had brought up the subject of Toad (and Stephanie for some reason had started describing his ridiculously muscular abs).

Other than that there were just glimpses; dancing, laughing, making out with some random guy in the coat room and then dancing some more.

And constantly the images of alcohol, all through the night until the point where she just missed a big chunk of memory. She didn't remember how she got home but at one point she did recall rushing out of bed to throw up in the toilet.

* * *

She woke up half hung over and half still drunk.

A loud, unmistakably British voice was talking very loudly, almost screaming, but it wasn't until Stephanie heard Cat's soft sobs that she reacted. Not feeling very well at all she stumbled out of bed and towards the door.

She opened it and stood in the doorway, taking in the scene and hearing Toad's words so much clearer.

"Could ya give me a bloody answer?! I've been searchin' for my shit for days, why was it in yer room?"

His whole body was stiff with anger, and he was facing Cat, holding some sort of mechanical device in his hand. If anything it looked like an electric screwdriver, but a tad more complicated.

Cat was sitting on the kitchen floor, hiding her face behind her knees and quietly repeating between sobs;

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

Perhaps Stephanie could have felt some sort of small satisfaction in the fact that Cat's delightful little friend didn't turn out to be so nice after all, but Cat looked so scared she had a hard time focusing on anything but that.

"WOULD YE STOP SAYIN' YE'RE SORRY?! DO YE HAVE ANY IDEA 'OW MUCH THIS IS WORTH?! WHAT WERE YE GOIN' TA DO WITH IT?!"

He didn't look less scary screaming and Cat started crying for real.

"That's enough, Mortimer."

Toad went still by the sound of Stephanie's calm voice and turned around to face her. Cat stopped sniffing and looked up from her hands. Her face was streaked with tears and her pupils were unbelievably large with sorrow, making everything visible of her eyes completely black.

"Can't see 'ow this is anythin' o' your business," Toad spat.

His face had turned a slight reddish-green from all the screaming.

"Leave her alone. You got your toy back."

"Stay out o' this you fuckin' neo. Go take a shower or somethin'."

Admittedly Stephanie was still wearing her makeup from last night. Her hair was a tangled mess and she hadn't slept in anything fancier than an oversized t-shirt and a pair of shorts.

To her advantage it must be said that she probably should be swaying slightly, considering the amount of alcohol still in her blood - but she didn't. She wasn't looking very impressive, though.

When Toad turned to Cat again she snapped. She grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl next to her and threw it at him, to get his attention. It hit him hard in the back of the head.

Her voice cracked a little as she shouted:  
"STOP CALLING ME A FREAKING NAZI AND LEAVE HER THE FUCK ALONE!"

Of course all of that was a mistake. She realized it as soon as the words had left her mouth. But by then it was too late.

Seconds after the apple had hit him he was at her side of the room, on her, pressing her into the wall with a hand that was clasped around her throat.

"Oh, how you are goin' to regret tha', puppet."

His eyes were slits and his voice was hoarse with the anger she had let loose. All with just that one well-aimed apple.

Cat let out a squeal of terror from her position on the floor, but Stephanie's head was reacting to slow for her to feel frightened. She was still on the sentence she was going to say, right before Toad had started to strangle her.

"She's a kleptomaniac." she grunted between gritted teeth. The edges of her vision had started to darken. "Why do you think she was up here in the first place?"

Toad looked at her silently for a long time. His eyes were close and very yellow and it was all she could focus on as the edges of her sight grew darker and darker. She felt her eyes starting to roll back into her head, and at that moment he let go.

She fell down hard on the floor, blood that was now allowed back into her head throbbing almost painfully in her ears. She gasped for air and leaned her forehead against the floor for support. Toad backed away from her, arms crossed over his chest.

Cat had started crying again, but from the sound of it with relief that he hadn't killed her.

"You ever throw somethin' at me from behind again I'll kill you."

Stephanie couldn't help to flash a humorless smile at the floor.

"It was a goddamn apple."

"Careful, puppet."

She decided she was ready to sit up and did so, supporting her back against the wall.

"God, as if I wasn't feeling bad enough already all by myself."

"Th' worse you feel th' better." His voice was stern now. "A kleptomaniac is someone who steals? This means she is a thief, like I said."

Stephanie shook her head, careful to do it slowly so that it wouldn't hurt.

"A kleptomaniac is a compulsive stealer. From what I gather she can barely help herself. She's up here because she wouldn't stop stealing from the other students. But you're seeing a doctor now, aren't you, Cat?"

Cat nodded from her position on the kitchen floor.

"It's been getting better," she hiccupped.

"See? It's even been getting better."

Toad didn't seem convinced.

"If she's gettin' better then why was my shit in her closet?"

Stephanie shrugged, massaging her throat.

"I'd say you didn't hide it well enough. She's not very good at finding hidden stuff. Terrible at hiding them herself. I go into her room and collect my stuff three or four times a week, it's become quite the habit."

He was silent again, for a while, and then he sighed.

"Livin with a bloody nazi and a kleptomaniac. Fuckin' bed o' roses."

"Hey, it's not so easy living with the _five point palm-exploding heart technique_-assassin either," Stephanie muttered, massaging her bruised throat.

An odd, grunting sound escaped from the green man. If she hadn't known better she'd thought it was the sound of someone holding back a laugh.

When Toad left the wing shortly after, Stephanie got up on her feet. The fast motion caused her head to spin a bit.

"Cat, you all right?" She asked.

Cat rose too, drying her face with the sleeve of her shirt and nodding.

"Good. Now I'm taking a shower, put on some coffee. It feels like my head is about to explode."

As the cold water in the shower sobered her up, a gut-wrenching near-death feeling along with old, dark memories struck her hard. She cried underneath the streaming water for about fifteen minutes until she felt ready to get out.

With a relaxed smile plastered on her face she went to comfort Cat.


	7. Stuck In The Middle With You

**Story fun fact**: None whatsoever. My brain is mush.

* * *

Chapter Six

**Stuck In The Middle With You  
or  
Comeback**

The water was cool on her skin, every stroke making her feel better and better. It was as if she could never get tired. She'd gotten in to a nice rhythm after a while, playing a song over and over in her head and matching the speed of her strokes after it.

She had no idea for how long she'd been swimming now.

Suddenly she was interrupted, an orange, plastic torso of a man falling into the water ten feet in front of her. It was a lifesaving practice dummy, and it was rapidly sinking towards the bottom, leaving bubbles of air behind in its path. On reflex she hurried towards it to pick it up before it sank too far, she knew how difficult it was to fetch it from the deep end of the pool once it was at the bottom.

She grasped it fairly quick and used her legs to push herself to the surface. She broke it with a gasp, and almost immediately she felt the weight of the dummy dragging her down. No matter how hard she fought with her legs she couldn't muster the strength. It was like all her energy had disappeared then and there.

Reluctantly she let it go and swam to the edge. Out of nowhere she was exhausted.

"Look kid, I'm sorry," she began while she tried to take off her goggles and heave herself up on the edge at the same time.

She ignored the fact that she should be angry at whoever almost hit her with a dummy, they probably didn't know better.

"I did my best to get it for you but I'm too tired. You're going to have to get that dummy yourself or the maintenance guy will be really pissed."

She had to give up heaving herself up on the edge and instead focused on getting off her goggles. She finally got them off then, about the same time as Toad answered her.

"Thank god that wasn' a kid sinkin, eh?"

Of course it was him. Standing by the edge in front of her and looking down with an amused smile on his face.

She put her hands on the edge, ready to act on impulse; heave herself out of the pool and run, but suddenly her arms started shaking uncontrollably. She had somehow used up all her strength and she hadn't even noticed.

Toad stood silent and watched her struggle. She settled on leaning against the edge and looked up at him.

"You threw that dummy down in front of me? Why the hell would you do that?"

He shrugged.

"You'd been in there for ages. 's my bloody turn now."

She could only stare at him. After a look around and a short pause she found her words.

"There are eleven other tracks, for god's sake!"

This time he smirked, cocking an eyebrow slightly.

"Well, wouldn' want t'be in the same water as you, now? Don' know if tha' Nazi thing ye got goin' on is contagious."

She was too tired to come up with an answer. Instead she put everything she could muster in heaving herself up on the edge. After the successful action she dropped down on her back, panting, her legs still in the water.

Toad leaned in over her and looked down.

"Ye mind? I usually give the water 'bout ten minutes after ye've been in it. I like t' think that'll give it time t' filtrate the worst away."

With an enormous effort Stephanie got her legs out of the water and rose to her feet.

She silently walked to her bag that she'd left on a bench, hoping with every step that her shaking legs wouldn't give away.

"Where are the kids?" she heard Toad ask from behind her.

She threw a glance over her shoulders. He was by the edge, ruffling in his bag after something.

"They're on excursion," she answered carefully, not knowing why he'd asked a question with such harmless content.

He seemed to find what he'd been looking for, a stopwatch. He looked up.

"Well, tha's great. One less day where y'might kill them! Must be feelin' good?"

She sighed. _There it was_.

Ignoring him, she collected her bag and goggles and headed towards the women's showers. She pulled her cap of in the process, and right at the entrance she stopped dead.

"Toad?" she called.

He was standing in the shallow end now, waist deep in water, and looked up with a surprised expression. Granted, it was the first time she called him "Toad" to his face, and the second time she called him anything other than "you".

"You should really consider wearing a swimming cap."

"Hm? And why is tha', pray tell?" he called back.

A small, satisfactory smile played on her lips.

"They say the chlorine can turn your hair green."

She vanished into the showers as fast as she possibly could.

* * *

The rest of the week was wonderful for Stephanie. She had stumbled upon a way to beat Toad, and the feeling was marvelous. Even though she had been quite freaked out by him strangling her she hadn't really realized it until later on.

To him, she had seemed almost unaffected by the whole 'almost dying'-part, and she could tell it bothered him. For a former assassin who was used to people always fearing he might kill them it must have been unbelievably disturbing to have someone act like they didn't care.

That was how Stephanie liked to think about that week, anyway. She liked to think she had been invincible. Every time he tried to pull off the assassin-act, giving her a scary look or insinuate that he'd kill her (sometimes he'd actually just say it out loud), she'd smirk uncaring. And every time he insulted her, she'd have a quick reply.

She loved having the upper hand.

On top of that Cat had started to take her side. Even if she sometimes chatted with Toad and he still helped her out with her homework, she was always quick to show on which side she stood whenever Stephanie and Toad had an argument.

Almost intoxicated by that feeling of victory Stephanie somehow forgot about that morning by the fridge. When she had tilted her face ever so slightly to meet his. Toad hadn't forgotten.

At first Stephanie didn't notice something was changed. She simply thought he'd realized his defeat and given in. She hadn't counted the times he was walking around without a shirt before, and therefore she didn't notice the number of times increasing.

But somehow he seemed to be shirtless every opportunity he got. In the mornings, in the night. In the middle of the day when he had decided he'd take a shower he would walk around bare-chested for at least fifteen minutes.

He always seemed to be deciding to take a shower when Stephanie was by the kitchen island on her laptop or in the sofa watching TV. It was making her very uncomfortable.

Partly because he was half-naked, half-nudity always seemed to make her uncomfortable. And partly because he was sort of her sworn enemy and sworn enemies shouldn't look… well, hot. But he did.

It made her embarrassed as soon as she realized she thought so.

Not so much because of the whole green thing. She'd become so used to different mutations she didn't even notice stuff like that anymore. She didn't even let Kurt's tail bother her anymore, for goodness sake. No, it was definitely because of the whole assassin business.

_Sure, bad boys can be slightly hotter sometimes, but an assassin…?_ She would think. _That's pushing it. I shouldn't even be imagining myself in a scenario where I thought an assassin was hot._

Stephanie wasn't very quick at connecting the dots between this new behavior and the fact that she wasn't bothered by his threats anymore. Of course she'd known there was a war between the two of them; she'd just assumed she'd won. This was a fatal mistake. If she had understood the connection… well, perhaps she hadn't been half-asleep on the sofa.

But as it were, she was. And she didn't notice anything until it was too late.

* * *

To Stephanie's defense she had just had an excruciatingly strenuous lesson. Another teacher had given the kids some sort of candy about half an hour before, and as a result of the sugar-high they had been all over the place, running around and screaming.

She had gone straight to the sofa to watch some TV afterwards, but ended up lying on her back and dozing off.

She awoke immediately by his weight on her, but she didn't quite understand what was happening until she opened her eyes and stared into bright yellow ones.

"Wake up, sleepin' beauty," he whispered.

She was so confused (and also quite scared) that she froze like a deer in the headlights of a car. He was leaning on one elbow and staring at her intently, lazily tracing her jaw line with his thumb.

It was incredibly difficult to get the words out of her mouth, but she managed:  
"What-what are you doing?"

"Sh, sh. Don' ruin it, love."

He adjusted his position slightly and his weight pressed her down into the cushions of the sofa. She was desperately digging somewhere in the back of her head to find the knowledge of how to scream and push someone, but she couldn't seem to find it.

His face was so close. His lips inched closer to his neck, and she had no idea what to think, let alone what to say.

Afterwards she wondered how long he would have pushed it if Cat hadn't arrived. He heard her steps outside the entrance to the wing before Stephanie did, and was off her in a matter of seconds. He started to walk towards the door as if he'd been heading out, and that was what Cat saw when she entered.

She still recognized something had happened in the look on Stephanie's face as she sat up in the sofa to gape at Toad. Cat cocked an eyebrow.

"What happened in here?"

Toad didn't answer. Cat looked at Stephanie again.

"Well you did something to freak her out. Look at her. Did you threaten to kill her again?"

This time he smirked.

"Couldn' have been tha', now? We all now Steph's not bothered by tha' stuff anymore. Right, puppet?"

Stephanie blinked.

"You know this is just getting ridiculous," she said, still in quite the shock.

She could still feel where his lips had touched her neck.

"Don' understand what you're talkin 'bout. Cheerio."

With a wave towards Cat he left.

Stephanie refused to answer Cat's questions about what had happened throughout the rest of the day.

* * *

The next time he crept up on her was later that evening. Cat had gone to bed and Stephanie was making a cup of tea for herself, trying to ease her nerves. She had been twisting and turning the event that had occurred earlier over and over in her head all afternoon.

Was this his new plan? It seemed to be some sort of plot aimed to have her reveal some sort of attraction to him that he could mock her with, a way to degrade her. Was this the purpose, what was he trying to achieve? And, most importantly, what could she do not to fall for his tricks?

This was all very difficult things to ponder, seeing as she really didn't want to think about it. At all. It made her uncomfortable, very much like the 'walking around shirtless'-deal he had going on.

She was pouring hot water on the tea bag as these thoughts went through her head, and when Toad pressed up against her from behind she instantly jumped away forwards, causing her to spill a great deal of it on the counter.

It ran over the edge of the counter and by reflex she stepped backwards to avoid the hot liquid. She backed into him hard which made him grunt, and for a short moment she hoped she'd hurt him badly.

But he snaked his arms around her waist in a matter of seconds, crushing her hopes. He put his chin in the curve of her neck and held her hard as she squirmed.

"Aw, look love, ye've made a mess," he whispered.

She finally twisted herself out of his grip and turned to face him.

"What the hell are you doing?!"

Toad seemed like he for a moment wanted to keep up the act, but then his face cracked into a victorious smile.

"Am I botherin' you, puppet?"

She backed away from him, realizing too late that the drenched counter was in that direction and the water soaked through the back of her shirt as she pressed her back against the edge. It was hot on her skin but she clenched her teeth to keep a reaction out of her face.

"Of course I'm bothered! You're- You're-"

She couldn't for the life of her come up with a decent ending for the sentence.

"… turnin' you on?"

She gasped – in her defense mostly by shock and not as much because she felt caught by his words. Smiling broader, Toad leaned back against the kitchen island and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Got no problem with some words, but you don' seem t'be able t' control yer _animal_ lusts over this…"

At that he made a slow gesture over his body with one hand.

Stephanie felt hot redness spreading all over her face. She was so mad she couldn't think of a single word to say, but forced herself to take a deep breath to calm herself.

"You," she hissed, locking eyes with him, "you stay the hell away from me."

She turned and hurried towards her room, leaving the teacup and the dripping water on the counter.

"I know ye don' mean that, puppet!" Toad called after her.

She slammed her door shut behind her.


	8. Didn't I Blow Your Mind This Time

**Story fun fact:** This was actually one of the chapters I got most... engulfed... in while writing, and I'm not sure why. Sometimes I just find a part of a story writing itself, and the last scene in this chapter was not at all planned beforehand. As the story is entirely from Stephanie's POV it could be that there is more of a glimpse of Toad's humanity than there's been beforehand. I really don't know!

But I do hope it will be as fun reading as it was writing.

* * *

Chapter seven

**Didn't I Blow Your Mind This Time  
**or**  
Flirting Techniques**

Things were embarrassing for Stephanie after that. She had had a winning streak of sorts and now suddenly all she could feel was that she had done something terribly wrong and lost it all.

Sometimes she caught herself wondering if he'd been right when he said those things about her finding him attractive, but as soon as she realized what she was doing she immediately shut that thought off.

She avoided being in the east wing alone, she mostly stayed in her room when Cat wasn't around. If she ever had to leave her room she'd watch over her shoulder all the time, making Toad snicker if he walked by at the time.

"Why so jumpy, love?" He'd say in an innocent voice.

Of course she now cherished having Cat around. She could relax with the knowledge that he wouldn't try anything like _that_ when Cat was around. She knew why; she wouldn't be the one embarrassed if he started pressing up against her when Cat saw it. But when they were alone she'd have no defense, all she'd have would be the lack of ability to speak.

She was at Cat's heels when they left the east wing, feeling relaxation hit her immediately after she walked out the door. She let out the breath she must have been holding in a deep sigh.

Cat raised an eyebrow at her.

"He giving you a hard time?" She asked.

Stephanie shrugged, hoping with all her might that Cat would never find out exactly what he was doing.

"You've been acting so strange lately, is all. You know, you could just tell Storm or someone."

Stephanie shook her head.

"That'd be letting him win, you know," she said pointedly. "Besides; I'm fine, promise."

Cat nodded, not believing her the slightest, and they continued down to the cafeteria talking about other matters.

She spotted Toad across the room once she and Cat had sat down. He was for some reason sitting with Wolverine. She never saw him in the cafeteria before, but lately he'd been popping up there.

Of course it was a great disturbance. He'd never do anything, never send her any looks or wink or even raise an eyebrow. He'd ignore her, actually. But just knowing he was there was disturbing enough.

When she turned to Cat she realized by the look on her face she probably just had said something.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"I said I'm getting more homework from that O'Callaghan bitch," she muttered.

This caught Stephanie's attention. She decided to ignore the harsh usage of words; she'd been seventeen herself not so long ago. She could still call people names if she was mad enough, if she was being honest.

"Again? What did you do this time?"

"Overslept. I hate her."

Stephanie smiled teasingly.

"Why did you have her as a teacher anyway? I thought I saw Scott earlier."

Cat looked sullen.

"Well, the X-men are having some sort of meeting all day. Just my luck. Stupid substitute."

Seeing as she whispered the last part under her breath while wearing an incredibly murderous look it's understandable Stephanie started laughing. It didn't help Cat's mood at all, though.

* * *

The rest of the dinner was relaxed, and Stephanie laughed a lot. She'd gotten all bad things out of her head and was actually happy as they headed towards Ms O'Callaghan's office to get Cat's homework.

She thought they'd taken quite the time eating, but Cat later stated they'd eaten for just the perfect amount of time. Otherwise they would have missed it, she said.

They were walking down one of the hallways connected to the entrance hall. O'Callaghan's office was in the far end of the mansion, so they had a bit ahead of them. They walked past a group of benches, where some of Cat's girlfriends sat. Cat went to greet them and Stephanie followed.

Very often Stephanie didn't know many of Cat's friends, and this was the case also this time. She did recognize Sandra, and nodded a hello at that one familiar face.

Suddenly she saw something going on at Sandra's cupped hands. At first she thought some sort of light was pulsating from them, but then she realized it was her skin changing color, back and forth. It was hard to see the nuance of the color as her hands were shadowed.

"Seriously you guys, I can't hold it in much longer," Sandra said, her voice strained.

Cat looked confused. Stephanie decided to ask about the color, which she now could see was green, that had slowly started to spread up her wrists.

"What…?" she started, but was interrupted by one of the girls fiery whispering:  
"He's coming!"

Suddenly she felt Cat grab her by the sleeve and pull her back from the group.

"I don't think we want to be a part of this," Cat whispered.

Sandra took a deep breath, and as she exhaled the color suddenly started spreading rapidly across her skin. It travelled from her hands, up her arms and from her shoulders erupted and spread up and down her entire body. In a matter of seconds she was covered in green from tip to toe.

"Is it good?" she muttered to the girl next to her.

"Make your hair darker!"

Sandra shut her eyes and her hair started to darken. She opened them and looked at her friend.

"Better?"

"Your eyes!" another girl whispered, "make them yellow!"

Sandra blinked several times and when she opened her eyes the shockingly green irises were now bright yellow. She looked pleased to have all attention on her.

At this point Stephanie turned to look down the hallway, and realized her guess was accurate. Coming towards them in a slow pace was Toad.

"He always walks by here after dinner," one of the girls said to Cat.

Cat and Stephanie shared a look.

"We should walk away," Stephanie muttered.

"You're probably right. But is it wrong by me to really want to see this?"

Stephanie grabbed Cat's arm tight and they started walking away from the group of girls, further down the hall.

"We should _really_ walk away," Stephanie repeated quietly

They hadn't even made it around the bend of the hallway when they heard Sandra's voice.

"Hey, you."

Cat turned her head immediately, and Stephanie couldn't help but do the same.

Toad, who just had been passing the group of girls, froze and turned his head. He looked like he'd seen something in the corner of his eye and wanted to confirm it. They could see his eyes find Sandra, and his body tensed.

"Are you fuckin' with me?" he growled, with a facial expression of someone ready to murder - and that probably was the case.

Cat started pulling at Stephanie's arm.

"We should definitely go there. I think we have to stop this."

Stephanie sighed.

"Couldn't we just walk away and hope that the screaming will attract an adult?"

"They're all in the meeting, remember? Besides, you're an adult."

Cat started pushing Stephanie in the back to get her to start walking.

"You've got to be kidding me."

They had to half-run to get there in time.

"MOVE!" Toad yelled at the girl sitting next to Sandra.

She yelped and jumped out of her seat. All the girls were white as sheets and looked at Toad with gaping mouths. As mentioned earlier he looked very intimidating whilst shouting.

Now, when he had access to the green-colored girl, he reached and grabbed her by the collar of her shirt. She let out a high-pitched scream.

He dragged her out of her seat, lifted her up and pushed her towards a wall.

"Take it off."

Sandra was scared half to death, not even trying to get out of his grip. Her face was a sickly pale hue of green and her bright yellow eyes were big as saucers.

She looked very much like she was about to cry.

"TAKE IT OFF I SAID," Toad screamed, his whole face distorted with fury.

At this she started crying. The green ran of her like water, starting at the top of her head and leaving fair skin and blond hair behind. She blinked to get the tears out of her eyes and they were suddenly blue.

This quick transformation, if anything, seemed to anger Toad even more, lifting her higher up on the wall until his arm was almost straight and Sandra feet dangled at least a foot above the floor.

His teeth were clenched so hard the tendons in his neck stood out.

"Stop him," Cat said in Stephanie's ear and pushed her towards him.

"Toad!" Stephanie started, but he didn't seem to hear her.

"I'll snap yer bloody neck, tha's what I'll do," he hissed, causing Sandra to start sobbing helplessly.

"TOAD"

This time Stephanie yelled at the top of her lungs and caught his attention. He let go of the girl and turned to look at her.

Sandra fell into a piteous pile on the floor and started crawling towards her friends while tears flooded down her cheeks.

"Oh, fuckin' great," he stated.

Toad's shoulders suddenly slumped as the rest of his mind caught up with his temper, giving him the look of a flattened balloon. At first he didn't look like he wanted to meet her eyes, but then he inhaled and seemed to force himself to look at her.

"Should we head up to ol' Chuck and get this all reported, hm?" he said bitterly.

He shot her a dirty look and then muttered under his breath, loud enough for Stephanie to hear.

"Bet she's thrilled, bloody wench."

Stephanie raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms.

She was suddenly pissed, at Toad for assuming she would rat him out and have him kicked out the first chance she got and at Cat for putting her in this position of responsibility. Most of all she was mad at the stupid kids for acting like little brats and in the process tearing up old wounds on someone who probably liked them very closed.

It resulted in nothing else than her acting out her irritation.

"Could you please watch your _fucking _language around the students?"

This shut him up, and it also made Cat stifle a giggle. Stephanie turned to Sandra. She was on the floor, hugging her knees - overall acting like the biggest victim ever seen.

Stephanie had to swallow hard not to kick her.

"Look at me."

Sandra looked up, surprised at her stern voice - she'd probably been expecting a comforting hug or something along that road.  
"You're all in the same boat at this place. What I would expect – not just from the seniors but from all the ages – would be for the students to at least accept each other's mutations! You're being hunted and degraded all over the world, and you can't find it reasonable to at least be respectful towards those who are exactly like you? How twisted is that?"

Sandra was gaping now; she had not been expecting a lecture.

"And you're nineteen for god's sake Sandra," Stephanie continued, "you're basically a grown-up. Don't you think you should be past that stage? It's embarrassing. You know what? I'm so ashamed I'd rather not report this to the Professor."

Sandra was quick to realize what was going on and immediately changed attitude from victim to regretful troublemaker. She dried the tears of her face.

"I'm so sorry Ms. Park. It's nice of you to give me a second chance."

"This goes both ways you know. If Mr. Toynbee gets a report, you will too."

Sandra nodded. Then she cast a glance at Toad, who was standing stern-faced and watching them from a distance. She motioned for Stephanie to come closer.

"I really didn't mean to offend," she whispered, "I think he's cute, I was going for an ice-breaker."

Stephanie had to bite herself in the lip not to laugh out loud.

"Well, Sandra, I'm pretty sure that's not the best ice-breaker there is. I think a lot of mutants probably would interpret something like that as mocking. Myself, I'd go with a simple 'do you know what time it is?' the next time."

The girl straightened up.

"Are you saying there could be a next time?" whe asked hopefully.

Stephanie sighed.

"Sandra, if you want to live to turn twenty you should most definitely stay away from Toad. And that would be my advice even if you hadn't just offended him deadly. Why don't you go for guys your own age, who aren't likely to kill you?"

Sandra threw a glance at Toad and nodded slowly.

"The bad guy act isn't as hot up close," Sandra muttered.

_At least not if you aren't getting too used to it,_ Stephanie thought and then immediately wished she hadn't.

She nodded at the girls and went over to Cat.

"I should probably comfort her…" Cat muttered, not sounding very happy about it. "I'll go get my homework later, you can head back if you want to. And hey, good work!"

Stephanie smiled and said goodbye. She didn't feel as good as she acted though, because she knew Toad was waiting for her, and he had the face of someone who wanted to talk. She was afraid he would find some way to mock her about this, too.

She was right about the wanting to talk bit at least - as soon as she passed him where he was leaning against the wall he silently pushed himself of it and followed her.

They walked without talking for a long moment, but when they got to the bottom of the stairs Toad finally spoke.

"Not reportin' me?"

"No."

He looked somewhat surprised, then he raised an eyebrow.

"And ye're not goin' t'tell me wha' _my _problem is?"

Stephanie looked at him and snorted.

"Oh, I think you know what your problem is. Your goddamn temper. You don't have to try to kill people every time they offend you, you know."

He nodded impatiently.

"Sure, sure. But ye agree I had the right t'be offended?"

It seemed like that had been the point he wanted to get to.

"Of course you did, that was a terrible thing to do."

He went silent.

"But don't be so hard on her," Stephanie continued when she felt the silence had gone on for too long, "she's just a kid. And apparently she was just trying to flirt or something. She thought you were cute."

They reached the top of the stairs and went into the deserted hallway that led to the east wing. At first he laughed at her words, but when she didn't join in he seemed surprised.

"Ye're fuckin with me."

"That was what she told me, anyway. And hey, why not? All little girls have the hots for the Big Bad Wolf, don't they?" she said with a teasing smile.

He snorted, but then he raised an eyebrow.

"_'Little girls'_? 'ow old was she, really?"

"Sandra? Nineteen, so she's technically still a teenager."

He stopped mid-step.

They were halfway down the hallway now, and Stephanie couldn't help stopping herself and turning around to see what he was up to. He stood frozen in the same spot, brows furrowed.

"Nineteen? She's jus' a bloody kid!"

"I thought that was what I said," Stephanie sighed and turned to start walking again.

He took a hold of her arm to stop her.

"'ow old are you?"

He seemed very serious suddenly, and the intent way his eyes were looking at her made her feel like the question was much more personal than it should be.

"Twenty-six, she lied."

He let go of her arm and gave her a stern look. His yellow eyes were penetrating.

"Stephanie, you of all people ought t'be able t' recall I'm a trained assassin. Among other things we learn t' tell when people are lyin'."

It felt strange hearing him say her name. She sighed.

"I'm twenty-one, happy?" With that she started walking again.

He followed her.

"Ye know," he said once he caught up with her, "if ye're twenty-one, then ye're only two years older than tha' girl."

Stephanie had never thought of that, so she did, and then she nodded.

"I believe I am. What's your point?"

"My point? Ye've been lecturin' me 'bout controllin' my temper 'round kids, yeah? But ye've never lectured me 'bout controllin' it 'round _you_."

Stephanie didn't know what to answer him.

"Maybe I can handle it better," she finally said.

He looked at her so seriously that she couldn't look away. His eyes seemed golden in the bright light of the corridor and she was slightly scared by the new, unknown direction this conversation was taking.

"Can you?" He said, never leaving her face with his eyes.

She recalled what he'd said about assassin training and all that, and a fear struck her that he'd be able to read whatever he wanted to find out in her face. She inhaled sharply and looked away.

"I think I liked you better when you were just nasty and didn't try to read my mind," she whispered.

He must have caught what she said because he chuckled.

They walked in silence the rest of the way to the east wing, but when Stephanie was about to go through the doorway Toad put his hand on the frame, blocking her path with his arm.

"Jus' one last thing," he said.

Stephanie looked up at him, wondering what was next.

_Well, things could probably not get any more embarrassing on my behalf_, she thought.

"Yes?"

"Well," he began, seeming to think of how to put his words, "if we've established 'all little girls have the hots for the big bad wolf'… and we've both come t' the understandin tha' the term 'big bad wolf' is a reference t' _me_..?"

She nodded slowly to show that she was with him that far.

"Ace. If we now put all tha' together with the knowledge tha' ye're just twenty-one – a little girl-"

At this point Stephanie felt all the blood in her body starting to rush to her face.

"Then can we safely assume th' rule applies t'_ you_ as well?"

Stephanie's cheeks felt like they were burning, but she hoped with all her heart it didn't look like it from the outside. She decided to duck under his arm instead of answering, and then hurried to her room.

_I was wrong_.


	9. Woo Hoo

**Story fun fact:** this is where it gets fun!

* * *

Chapter eight

**Woo Hoo  
or  
Tequila and Some of Its Other Consequences**

Somehow after that strange day it became even more important for Stephanie to avoid Toad. Even if that conversation in the hallway – that she had analysed and played through her head over and over – had eased her mind and the knot of nervousness in her stomach, she still knew too much time spent between her and Toad would end up in disaster.

She had started to think about him in a different way, and she knew her mind would combine thoughts like that with the memory of him staring at her face with those intense eyes, and it would all cook in her head for a while and then transform into some stupid idea. An idea that would never come true and would end up worsening everything for her.

So Stephanie avoided Toad. And he had also stopped walking around shirtless and sneaking up on her, which helped with _those_ thoughts she had about him - but worsened that new idea that perhaps he was a nice guy.

He had stopped coming with comments about her someday accidentally killing the kids when he showed up after her lessons to swim. Instead he was quiet, sometimes even nodding her a hello, as he headed towards the pool.

The children avoided him, the word on what he did to Sandra had gotten out and most of the young ones thought of him as some sort of horror character. Stephanie felt sorry for him when she saw the kids walking big circles around him as they walked to the showers, staring with wide eyes.

_That_'s _probably how he likes it best anyway;_ she would think to put her mind at ease, _leaved be by the annoying kids._

* * *

"And a new bathing suit, check. Anything else you want me to bring back?"

Cat tapped her bottom lip with the pencil thoughtfully as she scanned the list she'd been writing on for the last few days.

Stephanie was on her laptop, searching the internet for some fun new exercises for the swimming class. She looked up.

"Did you remember to write down that Tarantino dvd-box you talked about? I've been dying to see a decent movie in ages."

Cat nodded and scribbled on her paper.

"I can probably convince dad to let me take a bunch of movies. He adores me."

A snort from the couch gave away Toads position; he'd been watching "How It's Made" on the Discovery Channel but had now obviously listened in on their conversation.

Stephanie hid a smile with her hand as Cat threw a murderous glance his way.

"How about you, Mr. Polite? You want something from New York?" Cat asked, seeming to try and keep a hissing tone out of her voice.

Cat was going home to her family over the Christmas break. She was one of the few, actually; as tension rose in the aftermaths of different FoH and CS attacks on mutants many parents wanted their children to stay where they were safe.

Stephanie had been advised by Professor Xavier not to leave the mansion grounds at all. She had a feeling Toad had been told the same thing; she'd been seeing him around a lot more lately.

Because of this curfew many people had lost opportunities to shop and fill up stocks back home, and this had led to Cat being asked to bring tons of things. She had been forced to write it all down to remember it.

Toad was silent for a moment.

"Would you be able t'get to a hardware-store?" he finally asked.

"Sure."

His head popped up over the sofas back, his face looking almost eager.

"'s no small list, ye know."

Cat shrugged.

"Bring it to me before I leave and I'll get it for you."

He nodded something that could have meant 'thank you' and disappeared behind the back of the sofa again.

"Should go pack, I guess," Cat muttered, eyeing her list.

She slid of the kitchen stool and went to her room.

It only took a few minutes after Cat's departure for Toad to move over to where Stephanie was sitting. She felt his eyes on her and looked up from her laptop screen. He was on the other side of the kitchen island, leaning against the wooden desk on his elbows.

She raised an inquiring eyebrow.

"So ye fancy Tarantino films?" he finally asked.

She waited for some sort of insult but he didn't seem to have one coming. She nodded carefully.

"Yeah, sure, most of them anyway."

He nodded and focused his gaze on a pile of books Cat had left on the island earlier.

"A friend o' mine, M- … _Raven,_ had a bunch of his films. She used t' lend me them."

Stephanie instantly knew he was talking about Mystique, or Raven Darkholme, the shape shifter. She had heard about her many times before, when she was with the CS.

It was the first time ever she had heard Toad mentioning something about the Brotherhood or some of its members, but she didn't ask him to elaborate.

She was silent for a while, and Toad was starting to look uncomfortable, but then she smiled and said:

"So how's the portrayal of assassins in _Kill Bill_? Coming from someone who knows the real deal, I mean."

He suddenly grinned.

"A bit off, to be honest, but 's still good t' watch."

Stephanie's smile widened mischievously.

"You know what? That's exactly the way I feel about the Nazi portrayal in _Inglorious Basterds_."

And that was the first time she heard Toad laugh a genuine laugh.

* * *

"I don't know," Stephanie finally said. "Is Ororo okay with it?"

Jubilee rolled her eyes.

"Maybe she _wouldn't_ be okay with it… but seeing as we're not going to tell her, as far as she's concerned there's nothing for her to be or not be okay with."

Stephanie shot a glance at Rogue. She was usually the saner one of the two. Rogue smiled reassuringly.

"It's not a big deal, really. We're off tonight but we can't leave the mansion so we're just going to stay in. To amuse ourselves we'll have a game of poker with the guys. And," - she interrupted Stephanie who had opened her mouth to say something- "there will occur some amount of alcohol, sure, but how much one drink is really up to oneself, isn't it?"

Stephanie sighed.

"You're probably right."

Reluctantly she agreed to meet them at their living area later that night.

* * *

Stephanie was caring of her pot plant when Cat came in to say goodbye.

"Hope you'll manage without me," Cat smiled when they hugged.

"I'm positive I will. He's been almost nice lately," Stephanie answered, immediately knowing what – who - Cat had been referring to.

Cat broke the embrace and looked Stephanie in the eyes. Her pupils were huge and black now, as they've been most of the time during this colder part of the year.

"Still. Be careful, don't do anything stupid. Like insult him so he tries to choke you again."

Stephanie shuddered at the memory.

"Promise. No stupidity. Now go, your dad's waiting."

Cat gave her one last, brief hug and then hurried away. Stephanie turned to her pot plant once again, picking a little at the dirt.

_God I hope I wasn't lying to her_, she thought to herself.

* * *

A couple of hours later she was with Rogue and Jubilee and some of the other junior X-men. The male juniors all shared the same area, and since the female ones shared theirs with younger students they all decided to have the poker night over at the guys.

They had put up a big, round table, someone had found a poker table cloth and Bobby was already shuffling the cards. Kitty was stacking up poker chips from a briefcase and Rogue was handing out beer to everyone.

"So I was thinking a tournament," Bobby said when it seemed everyone had arrived.

"Give it a rest!" Jubilee shouted from the kitchen counter where she was sitting.

She took a swig from her beer.

"Uh huh. And what's wrong with a tournament?"

"Just hand out the chips. Stop complicating things."

Iceman sighed but seemed to silently agree as he did what Jubilee told him.

"Okay, everyone who's playing puts 50 bucks in the pool," he said as he started placing out the chips.

Stephanie had a small difficulty with pulling out her bills from her front jeans pocket, seeing as they were a very tight pair. After a short struggle she managed though, and she put them in the pile along with everyone else's money.

She sat down and waited for her cards to be dealt.

Stephanie had a great night. She wasn't very good at Texas Hold 'Em, but she enjoyed her beer and the company. It was nice to hang out with people her age once in a while.

After too many losses she abandoned the game and joined Jubilee and Colossus in the kitchen.

"Hey, why haven't you been playing?" she asked Jubilee and grabbed another beer from the fridge.

"Nah. Never been especially good at that stuff. I hate losing."

Colossus drank from his beer and leaned against the counter.

"I was losing too much money… have to be able to afford some Christmas gifts, you know?"

Stephanie laughed.

"So we are the ones who suck too much at poker to play. That's great."

Jubilee smiled but had an absent look on her face. She was watching Rogue.

"She looks like she's having fun, right?"

"Why wouldn't she be?" Stephanie asked.

"She used to date Bobby," Colossus answered in Jubilee's place.

"Yeah but that ass dumped her and now he's with Kitty. Kitty used to be Rogues best friend, did you know that?"

Stephanie looked at the couple who were sitting together and sharing cards and acting very sweet. She remembered when she herself had stolen her best friend's boyfriend.

_God, I was a bitch back then_, she thought to herself.

She watched Rogue. If she was taking it bad she had a good façade going on.

"She seems to be taking it well," Stephanie told Jubilee, "without being sure whether or not she was telling the truth. She's probably having a great time," she then added.

Jubilee sighed and turned her back at the poker table.

"Bobby is still a giant assface."

Colossus laughed.

Stephanie looked at Rogue again, trying to read her emotions. She saw Rogue cast a quick glance at the couple when they shared a kiss, and something in her face fell.

"You know what?" Stephanie said, turning to the two others again. "We can never be sure if she's all right or not but we can do something that'll make her happier either way."

"Like?" Jubilee asked, bottle frozen half way to her lips.

"Getting her really drunk!"

Jubilee laughed.

"We could all use some getting really drunk."

"Coming right up," Colossus said, and a few minutes later everyone held a tequila shot.

The poker game paused as everyone put a pinch of salt on the back of their hand.

"You know the drill people!" Rogue said, and she was laughing which made Stephanie feel good about her idea. "Salt, tequila, lemon, go!"

The room was filled with a brief silence as everyone followed Rogues instructions.

* * *

That morning Stephanie found herself with an aching head and a bad taste in her mouth. She realized two things the second she opened her eyes. The first thing was that she was not in her room; the second thing was that she had someone else's arm draped over her waist.

Memories from the night before came rushing back to her and just about the same time the person next to her removed their arm.

With nothing less than horror she turned her head to confirm what she already knew. As their eyes met the both of them simultaneously uttered a hissing curse.

The man next to her was green.


	10. Natural High

Chapter nine

**Natural High  
or  
What Happened**

Stephanie could walk quite straight when she decided to head back to her room around half past three that night. This was something very good, as it meant she could sneak back without disturbing anyone. She amused herself with imagining all the things she could have accidentally knocked over on her way back had she been more drunk.

_Those paintings_, she thought, _would totally be on the floor right now if it wasn't for my soberness._

She walked up the stairs, passed a small marble bust of some famous old philosopher.

_You're one lucky man; you'd be in a thousand pieces right now if I couldn't hold my liquor. _

She smiled for herself and headed further down the hallway.

Soon she was in front of the entrance to her living area and congratulated herself on her excellent walking skills. She had gone all the way without waking one single person up. That was just impressive.

Perhaps she was too pleased to think about keeping the noise down once she was back in her living area, and that's why he got up. But probably he had already been up, he never seemed to be much of a sleeper.

She went inside, got a can of cola from the fridge and decided to watch some TV. She went over to the coffee table, put down her coke and started skimming through the TV magazine laying there for some decent show. She had difficulties making out the text in the dark and this was the simple reason for her hovering over the open magazine for several minutes.

"Why not jus' turn on th' lights?" came a voice from behind her, and she turned around quickly to find herself only inches from Toad.

In retrospect it was probably more old habit than real feeling behind this certain sneak of his. Stephanie still reacted the same way she always did; she became utterly startled, gasped and backed away.

She hit the hollows of her knees hard in the edge of the coffee table and was about to fall backwards when he caught her. She grasped his neck for support.

"You a bit tipsy?" Toad chuckled, with yellow eyes gleaming in the darkness as he pulled her up to her feet.

She realized she still had her arms around his neck just about the same time he did, and he looked at them and then at her.

Stephanie tried to tell herself afterwards she wasn't sure who had initiated the kiss. But she knew; it had been her.

There hadn't been a moment of silence when they'd inched closer to each other, shifting glances between each other's lips and each other's eyes to make sure the other one was in on it, no; she had instantly – and quite brutally - smashed her lips onto his.

At first he hadn't responded, lips motionless in surprise. Still, within seconds he was kissing her back with the same ferocity. She clasped her arms closer around his neck, amazed over how _good_ it was feeling and wondering why she'd never thought of it before.

Suddenly he had become all she ever wanted and the wash of heat coming over her was wonderful.

She started tugging at the bottom of his t-shirt, managing to get it over his head in between kisses. His body was hard and his skin hot under her touch, and she couldn't get enough of it.

She ran her hands up his back and felt the muscles tightening underneath her fingers when he pulled her closer. He slid his hands down to her ass and lifted her up, causing her to give away a small noise of surprise and clasp her legs around his waist.

He carried her toward his room this way and his lips travelled down her jaw line.

When they passed the threshold to his room Stephanie had nothing on her mind except the feeling of his lips against her neck and the moan that was about to escape hers.

* * *

"Oh, _fuck me_."

"I believe I jus' have, love."

Stephanie snarled at him and almost fell out of his bed in her rush to get out of it. She found her panties next to the bed and pulled them on – her subconscious went _well, at least I wore lace_ but she chose to ignore it.

"Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck," she kept going while she threw her bra on and clasped it behind her back.

The rest of her clothes were strewn evenly all over the floor and she ran around collecting them in her arms.

Toad had eased himself up to lean his back against the bed frame. He put his forehead in his hands for a couple of seconds, contemplating, and then let go with a sigh.

"Well, ye think I'm happy 'bout this?"

She had finally found her jeans and forced them on – involuntarily remembering the night before when Toad had had such problems getting them off her. It had seemed hilarious at the time.

"You're…? I-I was drunk!"

She froze with the zip of her jeans only half-closed and looked at him wide-eyed.

"You took advantage of me! That's it! I was drunk!"

This caused him to laugh.

"_Advantage_? Gimme a break, ya practically threw yourself on me!"

Stephanie almost whined.

"Well couldn't you have just thrown me off then?"

He threw his head back into the bed frame and stared at the ceiling.

"I wish I had. Believe me, puppet, there are so much more things I'd rather be regrettin' right now."

This time a whining noise did escape her lips.

"Well fuck, she stated."

She finally got her shirt on and hurried towards the door. She stopped in the door frame and turned to him, zipping up her jeans all the way and buttoning.

"This – she made a motion towards the bed with her hand – this never happened. Never ever."

"Preachin' to the choir, Toad muttered."


	11. Jungle Boogie

This would be were the previous mentioned warning should be issued out.

**WARNING:** This chapter does contain some graphic descriptions of the sexual kind. The text will not really describe the business itself so to speak, but some actions before of a mildly sexual nature and with definite implications of sex. If you are not comfortable with what I just described, please skip ahead to next chapter (or just stop reading this chapter at the point Toad enters the shower).

**Story fun fact:** at the point I wrote this it was the smuttiest I'd ever written. I hadn't really done it before so I was extremely careful (and you'll probably notice). Now, later, I've done way worse. Mostly in the Creed-story I'm working on... but somehow that's just how it has to be with Victor. Heh.

Don't own anything, just saying.

* * *

Chapter ten

**Jungle boogie  
or  
How To Lose an Argument**

Stephanie desperately wanted to take a shower, but even more she wanted to get as far away from Toad as possible. In her room she found a plastic bag and she thrust some clean clothes and a towel in it.

Ten minutes later she was in the women's showers of the underground swimming hall. She struggled between wanting to forget all about what had happened and wanting to think it all through. Why had she done it? Could she really blame the liquor? Shampooing her hair and trying to keep from pounding her head against the wall she thought it through.

She hadn't been that drunk. Sure, she probably wouldn't have attacked Toad with her lips hadn't she been under the influence of alcohol. Still she also knew she wouldn't have done something she didn't want to and that was even harder to accept.

"Ugh!" she finally grunted and decided she didn't want to be alone with her thoughts anymore.

After drying herself off and dressing she headed to the cafeteria to find some company.

* * *

She found Ororo quite quickly, and thankfully strolled over. Kurt and Cyclops were at the same table, drinking coffee and having a relaxed conversation. Ororo noticed her.

"Oh, hi, Stephanie! Come sit!"

The two other X-men looked up from the conversation and greeted her.

"Let me get you a cup of coffee," Kurt suggested politely in his thick German accent, "you look like you need it."

Stephanie thanked him smiling and he got up to get it.

_You've got no idea, _she thought bitterly.

Ororo immediately turned to Stephanie.

"Did you know the junior X-men actually threw a party _in the mansion_ last night?"

Feeling rather guilty Stephanie shook her head.

"No! That's surprising." she lied.

"It is!" Ororo agreed. "Thinking of the dangers we mutants face every day they really should know to be more responsible. A bunch of them are underage, you know? I'm especially disappointed in Rogue and Jubilee, just because they are allowed to drink doesn't mean they should encourage minors."

Stephanie was about to agree with a nod to help all suspicions towards her decrease when Cyclops argued.

"Really, Storm; it was just a poker night! They're kids. Soon we'll be asking them to go out in the world and risk their lives. Shouldn't we let them have some fun while they can?"

Ororo looked disapproving, and perhaps she was about to answer right away, but then Kurt came back with Stephanie's coffee.

"Talking about dat party again?" he asked.

Cyclops nodded.

"Well, I know where you two stand," Ororo finally said, "but I still think juniors who might go in to battle someday should be more responsible. Urges like the one who made them want to throw a party might put them in danger out there."

Stephanie sipped her coffee with half the reason to use the cup as a shield between her and where the conversation was heading. Cyclops answered Storm.

"You're reading too much into this. There's nothing wrong with having a drink once in a while, as long as it's not on duty."

"Logan drinks all the time," Kurt chimed in.

Ororo raised an eyebrow.

"Was that supposed to be helpful? Because I can tell you right away, it isn't."

Kurt threw a glance at Cyclops.

"It really isn't," Scott agreed

Kurt shrugged.

At that precise moment Stephanie looked up from her coffee and almost saw into the future. It was somewhat like the spider-sense of Spiderman. One look into Ororo's face and she knew what was to come.

She put her cup down with a clank.

The same moment that Storm opened her mouth and started to ask:  
"Stephanie, what's your opini-"

Stephanie blurted out:  
"God, I've got to go. I've got this…"

She couldn't think of anything to finish her sentence, all she knew was that she did not want to be dragged into that argumentation. Especially not if the X-men anytime could find out she had been at that party and played a strong part in the majority of the underage drinking that had occurred.

So instead she cracked a smile and said:  
"But this was nice… and stuff. Thanks for the coffee. Bye."

And then she left at almost half a run.

The confusion left everyone at the table silent for a moment.

"She barely touched her coffee," Kurt finally said.

* * *

Stephanie was annoyed beyond annoyance when she had stamped her way back to the east wing. All she had wanted was to shower off the feeling of that stupid man and then chat with someone until everything about him and what they had done had been pushed far back into her head. And not a single thing on that list had worked out, quite the contrary.

_Perhaps it's too crowded back there_, she thought acidly as she stepped through the entrance, plastic bag with dirty clothes and a wet towel hanging from one hand.

Toad was sitting at the kitchen island again, his hands were smudged with black oil and he seemed immersed into cleaning those tiny metal objects. Stephanie had never had the slightest idea what they were used for. She hurried towards the sofa, hoping she could hide there, but Toad had already noticed her.

"Good day," he muttered, not lifting his eyes from his hands.

She stopped dead and then everything seemed to crack.

"It's your fault!" she blurted, and her bag fell unnoticed to the floor.

The words caught Toad's attention. He looked up with a mild interest.

"Wha's my fault?"

Stephanie waved vaguely towards his room. He looked at the direction and then back.

"Oh," he said with something that looked like a smile tugging in the corner of his mouth, "ye're talkin 'bout tha' which _never ever_ happened?"

Stephanie clenched her teeth together, her temper flaring even more at his amusement.

"Well it did happen, and it happened because of you!"

Toad raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah? Do share."

Stephanie haltered a second but then found her words.

"I was drunk! She held up a hand to quiet him when she saw he was about to protest, I was drunk and – and you should have thrown me off!"

The green man dropped the tools he'd been holding on the kitchen counter and crossed his arms over his chest. His amusement was gone.

"Should 'ave thrown ye off, should I? Pushed ye down on ye're arse?"

"Yeah, you should! You were the sober one; it was really you in the position of responsibility, wasn't it?"

"Position of responsibility?!" He spat. "Well blimey, didn' know I signed up t' be some bloody Head Boy at this place!"

His mood had made a 180 degree turn, as so many times before.

This should probably have been a signal for Stephanie to stop, but it was too late for her to cool down now, and she went on:  
"You hadn't been drinking! That's a position of responsibility. If someone who you shouldn't be kissing kisses you and you're sober you push them away! You damn well don't go screw them!"

After this tirade Stephanie went quiet to catch her breath and with horror realized Toad had gone quiet as well. He just sat at the bar stool, arms still crossed over his chest, and stared at her with those yellow eyes. His face was completely expressionless, except for a slight squint. This scared Stephanie more than anything.

_I went too far. He's going to kill me._

Suddenly she didn't dare move. He was quiet and she was quiet and the pressure of the silence seemed to grow heavier and heavier. She met his eyes, wide-eyed and white-faced, and didn't dare to look away.

And then it was all too much for her. Her throat gave away a strange, dog-like whining noise and she headed for her room in a run.

She locked her door behind her and went to find her pot plant for comfort.

* * *

When it finally seemed Toad had left the wing for dinner Stephanie crept out of her room to fetch her bag of dirty clothes and after discarding them she hurried into the bathroom.

She had decided for a second shower that day, she needed something to calm her down - and alcohol would with reference to her earlier experiences not be the best option. It had been really stupid to upset Toad; she knew how his temper could get.

Cat would probably find her strangled body in a cabin somewhere when she got back.

_She's not going to be happy_, Stephanie thought to herself when she had peeled off her clothes and stepped into the hot stream of water.

The shower helped immensely. Stephanie could feel the tension in her shoulders letting go and her whole body relaxing. She was close to start humming when she heard a sound from the bathroom door.

_Did I forget to lock?_ She thought and snatched a corner of the shower curtain aside to look out.

The door was closed. Rubbing the water out of her eyes with the back of her hand she poked her head out to have a look. After a couple of blinks she confirmed that there was no one in the steamy bathroom except herself.

When she let go of the shower curtain and turned around she had to stifle a scream.

Toad was in the shower with her, fully dressed. He must have slipped past the shower curtain while she was busy blinking. He stepped closer to her, into the stream of water and winced slightly.

He muttered something that sounded like:  
"Bloody hot!"  
At the same time she started semi-screaming shrilly:  
"What the hell-"

But she couldn't finish her sentence because Toad had grinned, cupped her face in his hands and caught her lips with his.

The kiss was almost ridiculously intense; Stephanie forgot about everything and everyone. She noticed only the sound of the streaming water, his fingers cupping her jaws while his thumbs stroke her cheeks and, of course, his wet lips against hers. At the end her knees had started to give way.

When he broke the kiss he took a step back with a triumphant grin.

"Shouldn' ye have pushed me away by now, love?" he said with a teasing voice.

His hair was wet and stroked back (probably by her, but she couldn't remember doing it) and his dripping wet t-shirt and jeans clung to his body. Stephanie's body, on the other hand, was hot all over and she could feel her blood pulsating with every heartbeat.

Somehow she rememebred she was naked. She stepped closer to Toad. At this point he, too, seemed to realize Stephanie was naked and made to take another step back, out of the shower.

"With this departure I should win our littl' argument, hm?" he said, cockiness still in his voice but wavering slightly.

He was stopped in his movement by the tight grip she had on the buckle of his belt.

"You're not leaving," Stephanie murmured, pressing up against him.

She watched his face go blank as one of her arms slid up behind his neck and thought: _Is this really a good idea?_

"Leavin' this very instant," Toad answered distractedly, staring down her wet body and not putting very much effort into the words.

_I don't care_, she answered herself.

She slid her hand up the back of his neck and started placing kisses along the side of his throat, at the same time working on the buckle belt with her other hand. The leather was slippery in the wet and it took her several tries, during the time she could notice Toad's excitement increase against her thigh. By the time it was undone Toad had taken his shirt off and the wet jeans had to be pulled of him to join the shirt in the pile on the tile floor.

She started kissing him all over his torso, placing her kisses lower and lower. When she – on her knees now - reached the hem of his boxers with her lips she leaned back and looked up to meet his eyes.

Then she suddenly, and without warning, rose to her feet.

"Okay, now you can leave," she said teasingly, slightly out of breath.

Toads face cracked in a smile and for a minute neither of them did anything besides catch their breaths as he let his eyes travel over her wet, now slightly rosy skin.

Then the smile fell off his lips and he used his body to push her up against the far wall. The first contact with the tile was quite chilly on Stephanie's back, but Toad locking her arms above her head and giving her another one of those knee-weakening kisses made her forget all about it.

* * *

He was the one to leave first – when they both were done panting and they'd been in the water stream for too long for it to feel hot any more. The lust was ebbing from their bodies and suddenly a somewhat awkward feeling had begun to submerge.

In lack of words Toad just collected his dripping wet clothing from the tile floor of the shower and drew the shower curtain aside. A whiff of chilly air flew in with his departure and Stephanie silently shut the curtain behind him, only partly to protect herself from the air outside.

She stayed in the shower until she was sure Toad had left the bathroom and then she turned the tap off and slid out. She wrapped herself in a towel, collected her clothes from the floor and hurried into her room.

Stephanie was understandably quite exhausted; the day had not only existed of physically strenuous activities but also a genuinely confused mind that had not left her alone for the entire day.

She welcomed the blissfully blank mind her shower adventure had left her with and went to bed. She fell asleep almost immediately.


	12. You Never Can Tell

**Story fun fact:** I believe I wrote several if not all Christmas-centric chapters of this story during my Christmas break last year (or was it even the year before? This story has been under writing for way too long...). I have a habit of bringing up elements that are actually occuring in my life in the stories I write.

* * *

Chapter 11:

**You Never Can Tell  
or  
Christmas Baking**

"Well, come on, cheer each other on!" Stephanie yelled between cupped hands.

Her voice did not travel very well as the swimming hall was filled with the sounds of splashes and laughs from the kids. The last lesson before Christmas break ended with a game of relay, with a price for the winning team, and the kids had gone all in.

The teams were standing in the shallow end of the pool, one track each, and some were jumping around like crazy cheering their teammates on. Some of the children were getting really good while some, Stephanie noticed, still had some things to work on.

Rebecca, for instance, was showing of a rather unusual technique as she did a last few takes before she clapped the hand of her team mate.

"Ouch, you're hot!" the boy muttered before he started swimming.

Stephanie walked over to Rebecca and sat down on the ledge.

"What happened, Becca?" she asked.

Rebecca supported herself against the ledge with one hand and started massaging her calf with the other.

"My leg hurts!" she complained.

Stephanie hopped into the pool.

"Let me have a look."

She grabbed the girl's waist and lifted her up to sit on the ledge.

She had to let go quickly, Rebecca's skin had gone hot to nearly scorching. The water where she had been standing had been heated by it; it was almost like in a hot tub.

"Could you… cool down?" Stephanie asked, realizing she would not be able to touch the girl's skin for a very long time without hurting her hands.

Rebecca nodded.

"Sorry, I got scared by my leg."

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, and Stephanie could feel the air around her cool. Stephanie experimentally touched the bare skin of her leg, and it wasn't as unbearably hot anymore.

"That's all right. Was it this leg?"

The girl nodded.

Stephanie grabbed her ankle and flexed the girl's foot.

"Feel better?" she asked after a while.

Rebecca nodded.

"It was just a cramp," Stephanie explained, "whenever it happens, get out of the water and stretch like this, okay?"

She nodded again.

"Great." Stephanie turned towards the other kids. "Well, it seems we have a winning team, Becca!"

Rebecca turned to watch in time to see her last team mate beat his opponents.

When they've all gotten out of the pool Rebecca and her team mates got a chocolate reindeer each. Then she wished them all a merry Christmas and sent them to the showers.

Stephanie was almost relieved to see Toad come out from the men's showers while she was collecting her things. She called out.

"Hey!"

He stopped, looking like he really didn't know what to do. It was a strange look on him.

Stephanie got her bag and walked over.

"Not that I think we should talk about… it…" she started slowly, "but I think we at least should agree on not, you know, talking about it."

A corner of his mouth rose to a half-amused smile.

"So 'it' didn happen this time, either?"

She smiled uncomfortably.

"Glad we understand each other."

"I'm with you. Nothing happened, 'specially not twice."

Stephanie nodded.

"And even more importantly; nothing won't happen again."

He smirked this time.

"I'll be sure t' keep it in my trousers, I'd worry 'bout meself if I were you."

Stephanie had a comeback on her tongue but decided to keep it to herself. Instead she shot off an unnatural smile.

"I'll be sure to do that. See you later!"

And then she turned on her heel and hurried towards the showers. As she walked away she had to admit to herself; not mouthing off to Toad seemed even stranger than sleeping with him had. Twice.

Leaving the stairs leading to the underground swimming hall Stephanie ran into Rogue.

"Hiya!" Rogue chirped, happily, something that made Stephanie feel kind of better about all the juniors being caught with throwing the poker night and her getting away.

"Hi Rogue! I heard about Storm freaking out," she said, trying to find out if she could stop feeling bad completely.

Rogue nodded.

"Jubilee told you? Yeah, she was pissed."

Stephanie sighed.

"Actually, Storm told me herself. It was really nice of you guys not telling her I was with you."

"Of course we didn't! Storm seems to like you a lot, but I think she sometimes forget you're our age. And we especially didn't want you to get in trouble on account of…" she hesitated.

For a moment Stephanie feared she might bring up the CS, but instead Rogue continued:  
"Well, you being a teacher and all. We didn't want to endanger that."

Rogue smiled sweetly and Stephanie couldn't help to smile back.

"I really appreciate it! Are you guys going to be all right?"

Rogue waved her hand dismissively.

"She'll get over it. It was really quite innocent; everyone underage who was there is turning twenty-one next year. Storm was really the only one taking it so bad, what I heard Scott was even backing us up!"

Stephanie nodded.

"When she talked to me about it he was, actually. I guess you're right, but I still hope this will blow over quickly."

Rogue winked.

"Don't you worry, it will. Anyway, that wasn't what I came to see you about."

"Oh, you came here to see me?"

Rogue nodded and they started walking together.

"Yeah, I saw your schedule so I figured you'd be done about now. Well, to ease it down for Storm's sake we thought we could get together but do something innocent. Jube's convinced the Chef to let us borrow the kitchen tomorrow, the kids are going out sleighing with packed lunches, so there won't be so many to cook for during the day."

Stephanie felt like she was missing something.

"Are we cooking?"

Rogue laughed.

"What? No, silly, we're baking! Christmas cookies and stuff."

"Oh."

"You don't like baking?"

Stephanie frowned.

"Well, I like it all right but other people don't like _me _baking. I'm terrible!"

"This is me," Rogue said, and Stephanie realized they'd already reached the way to the girl's dormitories. "I'm sure we can get you your own bowl so you don't mess up other people's cookies," she continued with a wink.

"Come down for breakfast tomorrow and we'll talk more," she said before turning and leaving.

Stephanie stood silent watching her go, her newfound spider-sense going off like crazy.

_This can only end in disaster._

* * *

The silence was heavy all over the room, kitchen fans giving off the only sound. The group of young adults had gathered around the table that had earlier been used for baking, staring at the baking sheet in awe.

Jubilee was the first to go near it, leaning in to take a closer look.

Stephanie stood frowning next to her, hugging her arms around herself for comfort.

"I said I was terrible," she muttered slowly.

She had warned them several times, something that made the current moment even worse.

_Anyone can bake, they said, we'll help you out! I knew I shouldn't have listened. _

Jubilee reached out a hand and carefully poked one of the lumpy, greyish gingerbread men.

"It's like solid rock!" she whispered with amazement in her voice.

The group sneaked closer.

They'd all gathered in the cafeteria that morning, a group of ten or so, everybody in their late teens or early twenties, discussing over breakfast. When they were done they'd all gotten different assignments; looking up recipes, getting the needed ingredients from either the mansion's supplies or the local grocery store, setting up baking pans and finding the necessary tools in the kitchen's many drawers.

Stephanie had been in the latter group, which meant she got to meet the school chef before he ran off. The chef was a bearded, quiet man. He had a thick accent – he was from some sort of eastern European land – and he had an extra set of arms. Stephanie could easily imagine how those would be useful in the kitchen.

The four-arms thing had made Stephanie fairly certain she hadn't seen him around the mansion earlier. He had only stayed in the kitchen for a short amount of time, curtly telling them where they could find the things needed and how the oven worked, during which Stephanie had been constantly wondering where he could be spending his days if she'd never even gotten a glimpse of him before.

She'd tried her best not to stare at him, but hadn't helped noticing that he had made Rogue promise him to save him some of her cranberry cake before he left.

When everybody had arrived the baking had started, with a whole lot of laughing and flour being tossed around. The mood had been high, but somewhere it had all taken a dark turn.

Now here they were; the whole group in silent shock over Stephanie's attempt at gingerbread cookies. And with Stephanie in a real pissy mood.

"Anyone dare to taste one?" Colossus finally said.

No one answered.

"It's not toxic!" Stephanie exclaimed. "I used the same recipe as you guys did," she added indignantly.

"Nu-uh," Jubilee shook her head, "you couldn't possibly have! You must have accidentally added cement or something."

Rogue stepped forward and placed a supporting, gloved hand on Stephanie's shoulder.

"It's all right, Steph. You have other things you're good at."

"Yes, and with that kind of baking you'd probably make an excellent assassin," Bobby added, earning a murderous look from Rogue.

"Don't listen to him. It's not _that _bad," she consoled Stephanie, patting her shoulder a couple of times.

"Um… don't kill the messenger, but…" Jubilee started, but ended abruptly after a quick glance at Rogue.

There was silence once again.

"Well," Stephanie broke it, "should we throw them away?"

The question immediately raised a wave of comments.

"And risk the life of some innocent racoon?"

"What self-respecting racoon would go for that?!"

"A suicidal one!"

"We could burn them to be safe."

"But would they be able to catch fire?"

"What are you guys talking about? We should frame them!"

Stephanie's shoulders started drooping and Rogue went for another attempt to comfort her.

"You should bring them to your room, Steph. They'll make a great decoration for some Christmas spirit, even if they're not… you know… edible."

"I'd make an awful housewife," Stephanie whined.

No one contradicted her.

She ended up drowning her sorrows in one of Rogues _ridiculous_ cranberry cakes, sharing it with Colossus and Jubilee at a cafeteria table. They'd made Rogue pour a pound of frosting on it and where eating it straight out of the form, equipped with forks.

"If I could bake like this, everyone'd want me for their housewife!" Stephanie complained.

"One of a thousand secret recipes, she's got tons of stuff like this in that white-striped head of hers," Jubilee said calmly, digging her fork down deep in the cake.

Colossus swallowed the massive bite he'd taken seconds before.

"I think I'm in love."

Jubilee waved her fork at him.

"That's the frosting talking," she said, spitting out small pieces of cake in the progress. She swallowed and continued; "anyway, I've already called dibs."

"Sorry to tell you this, but I think she's into guys," Stephanie said.

"I don't care," came the reply, "I only want her for her cake."

* * *

When Stephanie had eaten enough cake for a decade she collected her cookies in a plastic jar (no one else had dared touch them) and very much nauseated, but not regretting a single bite, headed back to the east wing.

It was difficult climbing the stairs with such a full stomach, but she managed, and arrived to the living area in one piece. Toad was nowhere to be seen, and Stephanie was very grateful for that fact.

Contemplating whether she should spend the afternoon napping beneath her covers or not she sneaked a peek at her cookies. _They do look sort of Christmassy_, she thought.

Glancing around the living area she could tell the place really needed a bit of Christmas spirit. Perhaps she should put the cookies out in a bowl somewhere, for a strictly decoration purpose. Another swift look around, and she decided that it wouldn't hurt.

Stephanie's spirits were slightly higher when she some moments later curled into a ball beneath her covers, sleepy with cake-belly – and a locked bedroom door just to be safe.

* * *

She woke up a few hours later, for some strange reason hungry besides all that cake. She decided to head down for the cafeteria, since it was getting around dinner time. Unlocking her bedroom door and stepping out, she found none other than her green neighbor sitting at the kitchen island.

He was wearing an odd pair of magnifying goggles and fiddling with some mechanical devices yet again. He always seemed so at peace when he did things like that. When he heard her door open he looked up, pushing his goggles up in his forehead. He grinned at her.

"Did I jus' hear your door unlocking?"

Stephanie kept a bland face.

"You couldn't have. It wasn't locked."

He cocked an eyebrow and she decided on moving closer towards him instead of sneaking away – which had been the original plan. She didn't want him to think she was avoiding him, or somehow afraid that she couldn't control herself around him.

_I don't have the slightest trouble controlling myself around him_, she told herself.

Taking a few steps forward, she suddenly spotted the bowl of cookies beside him. It was empty.

_Did he throw them away?_

Suddenly she was filled with rage.

_Who is he to come and throw away my cookies?! It's not his problem if they're inedible, they were for decoration purposes!_

"Where are the cookies?" she blurted, staring at the bowl.

Toad looked dumbstruck.

"Th' cookies?"

"Where are they? Did you throw them away?"

She lifted her eyes to glare at him. He slowly and leaned away from her, distancing himself from her anger.

"Wha'? Why would I throw 'em away?"

"Well, where are they then?"

He looked utterly surprised, not managing a proper answer. Stephanie had her hands on her hips and was scowling at him. She was so mad she didn't know what to do with herself.

"Why would you throw away my cookies?" she hissed. "They weren't hurting anyone!"

"I didn' throw 'em away! I ate 'em, for God's sake!"

Stephanie's hands dropped limply down to her sides. She was silent for a while.

"You… you ate them?" she finally managed.  
"Ye ought t' have put a note there or somethin' if ye didn'-"

Stephanie interrupted him;  
"You ate them and you… you found them… _edible_?"

Toad stared at her, surprise still etched in his face.

"Yea?"

She could do nothing more than stare at him. She felt warmth spreading in her stomach and chest. It was terrible. She couldn't stand it, it was suffocating her.

Throwing a hand up to cover her mouth, where something was tugging at the corners, she gave him one last glance. Then she nodded.

"All right. All right then. I'm- I'm going to the cafeteria now," she muttered through her hand.

She left without another word, leaving the green man to silently stare after her.

Once Stephanie reached the hallway, a distance she decided was safe enough; she leaned against the wall and let out a sigh.

_Stupid, stupid._

What was it, really, to get emotional about? He had only eaten some cookies.

_Cookies that no one else dared to touch_, she interrupted her own line of thought. _And he ate every single one. _

Something hideously happy was bubbling inside of her. She had to smother it, but she didn't know how.

_Stop it_, she ordered herself, slamming her fist into her stomach, where the happy seemed to originate from. _That's enough._

She took a deep breath, thought about miserable things, and mentally forced the happy into a tiny box.

_Good._

* * *

**Someone's getting the feely-feels... ****Until next time!**


	13. Lonesome Town

**Short note: I'm posting two chapters now, partly because of how long I've kept you guys waiting, partly because these two are rather uneventful. For that I apologise. I wrote the story in one piece and did the chapters afterwards, some chapters turned out slow.**

Chapter 12

**Lonesome town  
or  
Secret Santa**

An early morning a few days later Stephanie woke up shivering. The mansion was an old building, after all, and even though it was highly technological in its places many parts still had creaky floors and insufficient heating. It didn't really get noticeable until the temperature dropped, and it took Stephanie by surprise.

She jumped out of bed, hissing as the cold air outside her covers hit her, and with clattering teeth started tearing through her wardrobe. She found a pair of pajama pants and a sweatshirt and hastily pulled them on.

Jumping back to her bed on one foot, she pulled a sock onto the other. Stephanie finished with the other sock about the same time she reached her bed, dived beneath the covers and wrapped herself inside it. She lay still for a while until the shivers started subsiding. Her nose was cold.

With a deep longing she remembered the thick, expensive duvet in her old apartment. It had been packed away - waiting for winter - during her departure and she had forgotten to bring it. How she missed it at moments like these.

Much too awake to fall asleep again and too comfortable to get up, she let her mind wander to the holiday growing nearer. Christmas was nice. She liked the traditions, the food and the company.

She was also looking forward to spending the Holidays with her new friends, the junior X-men. They had accepted her even though she wasn't a mutant like them, and it was wonderful for her to get to spend some time with people her own age. She wondered if she should get Rogue and Jubilee presents.

It was thinking that thought, her subconscious listing every person on the mansion she probably should be giving Christmas presents, that made her think of something she hadn't thought of before. Toad.

Would he be wanting a present? Would he be buying her a present? What if he did and she didn't get him anything?

_The proper thing would be to buy him something; after all he's my neighbor. And we did sleep together. Twice._ Stephanie's mind was panicking. _Why didn't I think of this before?!_

She got out of bed quickly, determined to go find Toad and settle the matter.

* * *

It was only after a quick scan through the east wing, a look into his room and a trip down to the cafeteria that she realized she had no idea where he spent his days. It felt awkward asking someone – perhaps they'd get suspicious if she ran around asking for Toad all the time – but she soon realized that was what she had to do.

She found Kurt in the cafeteria and he informed her Toad probably was in the garage. She had never heard of any garage, but Kurt gave her a description on how to get there and she was off.

Somewhere during Stephanie's walk to the garage through the giant mansion she realized how much of the place she'd never even seen. It was in the other end of the mansion, far away from the places she usually spent her time; the east wing, the cafeteria and the swimming hall.

Kurt's description led her past classrooms, dormitories and several sitting rooms she'd never even heard of. It freaked her out a bit, realizing she'd spent so much time in a place she barely knew.

She soon reached the in-door entrance to the garage. The door was ajar so she peeked in. It looked fairly normal for being the garage of a mansion – there was several cars and a pair of motorcycles but no single high-tech vehicle of the type she knew the X-men used. She was quite disappointed.

At first she thought no-one was there, but after a few seconds she could hear the muffled sounds from a radio. Trying to locate the sound she found a stairwell in the far corner of the garage.

She started to go down the stairs and the sound from the radio grew louder – sports commentary.

"_...- Taylor looks to the end zone-…"_

She kept going down, hearing snippets from the commentary.

_"…-the ball to Patterson and it is… it's touchdown!"_

Stephanie reached the end of the staircase just in time to see Wolverine throw a heavy wrench in the wall opposite him.

The large area where Wolverine was working was strewn with tools, but further away in the underground room were a seemingly endless number of different vehicles – many of which she couldn't even understand what they were used for. The place was enormous.

From beneath what looked like an aerial vehicle – but unlike anything Stephanie had ever seen before – were the legs of a man sticking out. She could hear curses in a distinct British accent emitting from beneath it.

"Your team not winning?" she asked with a smile, getting Logan's attention.

He grunted.

"Not by a longshot. Hand me that?"

He pointed at the wrench he had thrown. The impact on the wall where it had hit had caused a chunk from the concrete to fall off. Stephanie picked it up, reminding herself to not stand in Logan's way in case he threw it again. She handed it to him.

_"…- pinpoint accuracy by Taylor."_

Wolverine grunted once more as a thank you. He stuck an oily hand into the engineering of a massive, black motorcycle. He peeked in and stuck in the wrench.

"You here to see him?" he asked, nodding towards Toad's legs.

Stephanie nodded.

"Mort!" Wolverine called.

Toad wheeled out his torso from beneath the plane. He was covered in oil specks.

"Stephanie?" he said with surprise when he had sat up and seen her.

"Hi," she said with a smile, ignoring how strange the situation was, "so this is where you spend your days, huh?"

He got up on his feet and walked towards her, wiping his hands with a rag.

"Ye came here t' see where I spend my days?" Toad asked with a raised eyebrow.

Stephanie, who had only seconds earlier been completely amazed by the vastness of the room she was in, now tried with all her might to think of anything but how the muscles in Toad's arms flexed when he wiped his hands.

_What's wrong with me?!_

"Um… no. No, I came to ask you something, in fact."

He looked at her cautiously.

"'s it 'bout the cookies?"

She couldn't help smiling.

"No. It's about Christmas."

He looked even more confused.

"Wha' 'bout Christmas?"

"It's… Well… Are we getting each other gifts or not?"

Toad stared at her.

"Gifts?"

Suddenly Stephanie felt utterly uncomfortable.

"It's not that I very much want to or anything, I just think we should decide beforehand."

Toad nodded slowly, eying her carefully all the while.

"Sure," he said, drawing out the syllable, "do ye want to?"

"Yeah, well, if you want to, I mean."

_I'm stuttering like a schoolgirl! Jesus. Get a grip. _

He looked at her for a couple of seconds and then smiled slightly.

"Christmas gifts 't is, then."

Stephanie sighed with relief to have the conversation dealt with.

"Great. Well, you get back to… whatever you're doing. And your game."

She heard another grunt from Logan.

"The game is uninteresting - and annoying. Much like your conversation."

"Right. I'm leaving," Stephanie said quickly and turned around.

She left in half a run – Wolverine scared the hell out of her.

* * *

It didn't take long for Stephanie to freak out all over. This time because she realized she had no idea _what so ever _of what she should get Toad.

Their relationship was an odd one – it would be simply ridiculous to get him something like a gift certificate, and at the same time she couldn't get him something that had too much of an emotional value. And she didn't even have an idea of what sort of stuff he liked, or needed.

_A sweater? A screwdriver?_

She was hanging out with the X-juniors, lazily watching Rogue and Colossus playing chess, when she thought about all of this.

They were over at the boys' living area, and the muffled sounds from the juniors who had gone outside could be heard through one of the windows. The people outside hadn't been able to resist going out in the snow, but the four of them had chosen to stay inside.

Rogue seemed to be at the same train of thought as Stephanie, because she looked up from the board suddenly and met her eyes.

"Did anyone tell you about the Secret Santa thing?"

Stephanie shook her head. Jubilee, who had been lying upside down in one of the worn-out chairs, grunted.

"Right, that was me. I was supposed to tell her. I forgot. Sorry."

Rogue gave Jubilee a stern look.

Colossus sighed.

"Are you going to make a move or not?"

Rogue held up a finger to hush him. She turned to Stephanie.

"We're having a Secret Santa to make this whole thing with presents easier. All the juniors are in. You can be too, if you'd like."

Steph nodded.

"Yeah, sure."

"Great! We'll draw tomorrow and then you'll know who you're getting. We decided to keep the gift at 20 bucks and we're meeting and exchanging on Christmas Day, after the dinner. Sound good?"

Stephanie nodded.

"Really! I was thinking about that, I wasn't sure who to get gifts for."

"Will you _please_ make a move?" Colossus whined.

Rogue gave him a stern look. She moved her knight, and Colossus gaped at the board.

"Well, crap," he stated, leaning forward to stare at the board.

He started muttering to himself.

Rogue turned to Stephanie again, and Jubilee spoke up from her upside down pose.

"Yeah, and it would have been really expensive for _everyone_ to get _everyone_ gifts."

Stephanie nodded. She got caught up in her musings once more, and then decided to ask the others for advice.

"I'm supposed to get Toad a Christmas gift. Do you have any idea what I could get him?"

The girls both shook their heads, but Colossus looked up.

"You should ask Logan! He and Toad hangs out all the time in the garage."

Stephanie lit up.

"That's a great idea!"

Suddenly she didn't feel that much angst about the whole ordeal any more.

"We were thinking of heading down to town together for the shopping tomorrow," Rogue continued after a quick glance at Colossus latest move.

She moved her tower and Colossus hiccupped.

"You should join us!" she finished.

Jubilee suddenly span around and sat up. Her face was tinted red from all the blood that had flowed to her head. She studied the board intently.

"She's playing you like a little bitch, isn't she?" she finally asked Colossus with a satisfied smirk.

"Shut up," he grunted in retort.

* * *

It was actually rather strange leaving the mansion; she hadn't for quite some time. It had been nearly five months since Stephanie had stumbled through the iron gates, and she'd barely left it since – there had only been a few visits to the nearby bar with Storm and the other girls.

The juniors all decided doing their shopping in the small boutiques of the nearest village would be sufficient. No one was doing any extraordinary shopping, and they all were rather nervous about the different mutant threats mentioned on the news, so going any further seemed unnecessary.

The village lay in about 20 minutes of walking distance, so they went by foot. The air was brisk and filled with the light conversation of a dozen youngsters, and their pace was comfortably slow – there was no rush.

Stephanie hadn't seen the village in daylight before, so she was surprised of how charming it seemed, all covered in snow. She took it all in while the rest of the group discussed on a meeting point and time before they split up.

Not having listened Stephanie decided it was probably best to go with Rogue, lest she wanted to wade back through the snow for twenty minutes all by herself. Rogue always paid attention, so going with her Stephanie knew she'd be safe.

There weren't really a lot of shops, and not that many different things to get, so Stephanie assumed people got really creative. When Rogue and Jubilee got stuck in a shop selling handmade candles Stephanie decided to stroll across the street to a small liquor store. Creativity had never been a strong side of hers.

She followed the advice given to her by Wolverine and got Toad a bottle of pretty nice scotch and a packet of cigars from the counter. When she was about to pay she spotted a colorful cardboard box across the room, and realized it was some sort of drinking game.

As the store was completely empty except for her she threw a hasty smile at the cashier and jogged across the small room to have a look at the game. It seemed a good enough gift to get for Jubilee, whose name Stephanie had gotten on a note during the Secret Santa-draw earlier that morning.

It was looking up from the backside of the carton, about to smile reassuringly to the cashier to ensure the man that she was about to spend more money and not just wasting his time, that she caught a glimpse of a face that felt familiar through the window.

Turning her head to look outside, she saw nothing but falling snow and the two impatient young mutants outside of the candle shop looking around for her. She wondered if she was getting paranoid, and headed back to the counter with her purchase.

She decided to forget all about it, though she ensured herself if someone had the right to a little paranoia, it was her.

"Is it possible to get this one wrapped in here?" she smiled, waving the game.

After finding a nice knitted scarf for Storm Stephanie deemed her shopping finished, and spent the rest of her time accompanying the others and looking around the village. They stopped briefly at the small coffee shop and then brought their steaming paper cups with them to the meeting point.

As the group of young mutants and Stephanie headed back the snow started falling thicker, and by the time they got back to the mansion they were all covered in snow and soaking wet.

They all said some hasty goodbyes and went to their rooms to change to dry clothes. Times like this one Stephanie thought it rather dull to be staying at the east wing, so far away from everyone else. Of course, if she wasn't staying there she wouldn't really have a reason to be at the mansion at all.

She took her time heading back to her room, feeling extremely tired suddenly and distracted by the new wave of Christmas decorations that had hit the mansion. Just when she was about to start up the tinsel-lined stairs she saw a small, scrawny Christmas tree right beside the foot of it.

It barely reached to her chin, undecorated and with a lot of needles missing in a lot of places, but it was firmly placed in a nice metal stand and it was an actual Christmas tree. On a strange impulse she snatched it off the floor and headed to the east wing at a half-run. She felt strangely victorious.

When she brought it in Toad was watching TV, and he looked up and grinned at it.

"Did ye actually _buy a tree_?" he said incredulously, but Stephanie only shook her head.

"I stole it," she corrected him matter-of-factly, "it was just standing down there, no one's going to miss it. I mean, look at it."

She put her shopping bags down and tried to find the best spot in the room for her new finding.

The tree looked rather sad and misplaced where she'd put it down half-heartedly in the middle of the room. Standing alone in that much space somehow made it look even smaller.

_I'll never be a housewife._

Toad had stood up to have a look at it. He eyed it thoughtfully, arms crossed.

"It's a real shitty bugger, but I like it," he concluded.

They stood looking at it in silence for a few seconds. It seemed to shrink with every passing second. It had in the rough minute it had been standing there already dropped a handful of needles on the floor.

"We could fin' some decorations for it?" Toad suggested helpfully.

Stephanie nodded heartily, it would look so much better with some decorations.

"We got a real Christmas vibe going on in here," she said excitedly.

Toad only looked at her, with something close to a smile on his lips, not saying anything.


	14. Satisfied Mind

Chapter 13

**Satisfied Mind  
or  
Yuletide**

On the night of Christmas Eve the tables in the cafeteria were pushed to the sides to make room for the large Christmas tree that had been standing in the corner. Once everyone in the mansion had gathered the lights on the tree were lit and the teachers all helped pouring and dealing out hot cocoa and mulled cider.

They all sat down by the tables and benches surrounding the tree. There was a pleasant, calm spirit among the older residents - and an eager, childish one among the younger.

The children all gathered in groups, sipping their hot drinks and frantically discussing the coming morning. It reminded Stephanie of her childhood and the warmth of family, and even though the memories were lined with sadness she was glad.

She sat with the junior X-men, everyone spilling clues about their Secret Santa gifts and who they were giving them to. From what she gathered most of them were lying immensely.

Colossus was making joke after joke – every single one with the theme of spiking the cider – and even Storm, who was sitting close by, hid a smile behind her hand after one of them.

Stephanie could see Sandra – the color morphing girl - sitting with her friends almost across the room. She was frantically staring at Toad – and looking away as soon as his eyes went anywhere near her direction. She obviously hadn't let go of her crush quite yet.

Stephanie moved her gaze to the victim of Sandra's crush, who was sitting a few tables away with Wolverine and Kurt. Toad was looking straight at her. The corners of his mouth rose a quarter of an inch and he nodded, and as she nodded back she felt something flutter in her stomach.

_Fuck_, she thought.

Soon the snow-covered garden outside of the large windows grew dark with shadows and the children's voices lowered, sometimes interrupted by yawns. Storm was the one to stand up and announce that all minors would be going to bed. The older children complained a lot, but soon they all had left.

The adults all rose to leave and Stephanie – after some confusion – followed together with Rogue and Jubilee.

"Where are we going?" she asked Rogue, whispering because she wasn't sure if she was supposed to know or not.

Rogue looked ecstatic.

"The Library!"

Jubilee caught up with them and nodded, smiling expectantly.

"What happens in the library?" Stephanie asked.

"We're not really sure," Rogue said, "something with alcohol."

"It's the first year we're allowed," Jubilee continued, "you know how strict Storm is with underage drinking."

They all walked in a slow pace towards the library. It was a part of the mansion that had been preserved in an old fashion, the towering bookshelves antique and filled with dusty classics rather than bestsellers.

The furniture was, much like the bookshelves, expensive- and antique-looking, with dark, polished wood and upholstered leather seats.

The junior X-men who were there for the first time stood silently in the doorway, not really sure on what they were doing there. The others strolled over the thick carpet, poured themselves whiskey and cognac from a small table and sat down by the small fireplace or by the two-story windows overlooking the dark, snowy landscape outside.

"What do we do now?" Stephanie asked Colossus, whom she'd never seen more uncertain before.

She was sure he didn't have a proper answer, but all the others wore the exact same look, so she figured it didn't matter who she asked.

"No idea! I've never come this far."

Storm looked up from where she was, pouring herself Calvados into a crystal cognac glass.

"Come on then," she said with a smile, "there's eggnog. Really, Piotr, I imagined you to be rushing in here after all these years."

They all walked in slowly, carefully. Rogue was the first to pour herself a drink. She sipped on it.

"I feel so grown-up right now," she said with amazement.

"Sh, you're ruining it!" Jubilee hissed.

* * *

It didn't take long until they were all seated in the comfortable chairs and sofas, talking and laughing together with the other adults.

"You never did tell us what happened this morning, Logan," Cyclops suddenly said.

Wolverine, who was puffing a cigar, raised an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?"

Cyclops let out a laugh.

"I _mean_ when you came stumbling through the doors looking like a train-wreck."

"Oh," he said, taking a drag on his cigar and slowly blowing out the smoke, "well, I ran my bike into a wall."

Colossus gave out a snort of a laugh, which he then tried to hide with a cough.

"You did _what_?" Storm gasped.

Cyclops waved her off.

"Oh, relax, Ororo. Can't you tell he's fine?"

Something flashed in Storm's eyes. Stephanie, who had been sitting between Colossus and Jubilee in a sofa, sipping eggnog, looked out through the window and wondered if the rumble of thunder had been only in her imagination.

"It's not _him_ I care about. What wall did you run it into?"

Wolverine cleared his throat and muttered something inaudible.

"What did you say? You tell me right now; was it a wall on this property?"

"Relax, Ororo," the professor suddenly said from a table by the fire where he and Kurt had been playing chess, "the wall is fine. We'll reinforce it after the holidays."

"_Reinforce it?!_ Logan, how the hell-"

"Excellent question Ororo," Cyclops interrupted smoothly, "how exactly did this happen?"

Wolverine looked sullen. Toad, who had been sitting silently in the chair beside him during the whole conversation, suddenly snatched Wolverine's empty glass from the coffee table.

"Like me t' give ye a refill there, mate?" he asked, rising to his feet a bit too quickly.

"It's thanks to this idiot," Wolverine muttered, glaring at Toad.

"In my defense," Toad said from the drinks table where he was pouring scotch, "ye _did_ say ye wanted it t' go fast."

"I did say fast. I didn't tell you to put a fucking jet motor in there."

Toad put the glass in Wolverine's outstretched hand.

"And I did apologize, didn' I? 'Sides ye're fine now mate, all tha' matters."

Wolverine snorted.

"Of course I'm fine. I'm fucking indestructible."

"_What. About. The. Wall?"_ Ororo said, dangerously slow.

The both of them went silent as the heavens outside rumbled.

"'s his fault, really. Shouldn' 'ave steered right into it, ye know?" Toad finally said.

Wolverine gave him a murderous look.

"Relax, Ororo," the professor said without lifting his eyes from the game, "it's taken care of. Have some more to drink."

"I'll be damned if I don't," Ororo hissed.

Jubilee leaned into Rogue and with wide eyes whispered, loud enough for Stephanie to hear;  
"The Library is _awesome_."

* * *

The rest of the evening passed in a pleasant mood. As the night grew late people started leaving for bed.

Stephanie got up with Jubilee and Rogue, and they parted ways outside. Toad caught up with her moments after.

"Ye mind if I walk with you?" he asked.

Stephanie smiled as they started walking together towards the east wing.

"Of course not. I don't think you've ever asked permission before?"

He shrugged, yellow eyes looking away for a moment before catching hers once more.

"Didn' really 'ave any important matter o' some sort t' discuss this time, did I?"

She laughed.

"I guess it's a good thing - those matters rarely are of any good kind."

He nodded at this. They walked back to the east wing in light conversation, and to Stephanie's surprise it didn't feel awkward at all.

* * *

Stephanie woke up on Christmas Day with a particular feeling of Christmas in her stomach.

She couldn't help thinking of the upcoming day with anticipation, the day before had felt more real than any Christmas celebration she'd experienced – even when she'd been a child celebrating with her family. Somehow the traditions and the feeling of solidarity had really gotten to her.

She pulled on the most comfortable clothes she could find – her worn-out pajama pants, an oversized knitted sweater and a thick pair of woolen socks. She strolled out into the living area and decided to start off the day with some hot chocolate.

She was overjoyed to find actual dark chocolate in a supply closet – this meant she wouldn't have to use cocoa, and she really liked the other kind better. She hummed as she put a saucepan of milk on the stove and started chopping up the chocolate.

"Mornin'," Stephanie heard from Toads room.

She turned her head to see him standing in his doorway, yawning.

"And a Happy New Year," she replied, saluting with her knife.

Toad flinched.

"'s too bloody early for weaponry."

Stephanie looked at the knife in surprise, and then back at the tense Toad. She could actually see his muscles relax when she lowered it.

"Right. I'm making some hot chocolate. You want any?"

The mutant slid onto one of the kitchen stools and nodded.

"Ye're perky this mornin'?"

Stephanie used her knife to push the chopped chocolate from the cutting board into the saucepan.

"I'm really feeling the whole Christmas deal this year." She started whisking. "Oh, I left your present under the Christmas tree," she added.

The small, half-dead tree looked bare without any decorations, but none of them had had the energy to scout the mansion for Christmas balls and tinsel, despite the big talk.

Toad went curiously to the tree, and then froze.

"'ow much did ye get me?!" he asked, disbelieving.

"What?"

Stephanie went to were Toad were standing, and then she too stopped in surprise. Her two small packages looked very poorly wrapped next two the three massive, glittering examples of wrapping craftsmanship standing beside them. She gasped.

"What _is _that?"

Toad looked at her and raised an eyebrow.

"They're not yers?"

Stephanie shook her head no, gaping.

"Mine are the two shitty ones."

The mutant took a closer look at the smaller gifts.

"The green ones?"

Stephanie hade moved closer to one of the gifts that looked like they'd sprung from a Disney movie.

"I thought it would be funny," she said dismissively.

She kneeled next to the gift and read the fancy scribbling on the note attached to it.

Toad had picked up one of the gifts from Stephanie – the one containing whiskey - looking even more curious.

"It's from Professor Xavier!" Stephanie announced. "This one's for me." She crawled over to the other packages and read the notes.

"There's two for me and one for you," she summed up when she'd read the notes.

Toad forced his eyes from the small, green package in his hands.

"Yeah?"

Stephanie nodded eagerly.

"Let's open them!"

Her green neighbor sniffed the air, raising an eyebrow.

"There's something burning."

Stephanie smelled it too. She was up in a run.

"Crap! The chocolate!"

There was not much chocolate left to save, so they decided on brewing a pot of coffee and started unwrapping the gifts from Xavier while they waited for it to finish.

Toad received a strange pair of magnifying glasses. Stephanie suspected he was more thrilled of the gift than he made it seem, because his eyes had widened immensely when he'd opened it.

One of Stephanie's gifts contained an unbelievably thick, expensive-looking duvet that almost made her squeal with joy. The other one contained a beautiful, antique flower pot, with delicate flowers carved and sculpted all over the surface. It looked very fragile, and came with a strange note: _I thought you might be able to handle one that requires a lighter touch now._

Toad seemed confused when she read it out loud, but she didn't elaborate. She wondered if the professor knew everything that went on in his mansion, and the thought almost made her blush.

Exchanging their gifts was pleasant enough. They sat on the floor in front of the plastic tree, surrounded by the glittering, crumpled wrapping paper from Xavier's gifts. Toad seemed happy about the whiskey, but mentioned that he'd actually given up smoking when he'd opened the cigars.

He still seemed utterly pleased, saying he could give them to the chimney that was Wolverine as a reconciliation gift for making him crash into a wall. This made Stephanie think that getting the cigars for himself in the end had been Wolverines plan all along when he suggested the gifts to her.  
Toad had gotten Stephanie a dvd-box named "Quentin Tarantino – the ultimate collection", and he apologized for it not containing _Inglorious Basterds_ almost before she had opened it.

It was a somewhat personal gift, and Stephanie was more touched than she'd liked. They drank their coffee, went to their separate rooms to get dressed and then headed for the cafeteria for breakfast together.

* * *

The holidays started off well and continued along the same theme. The children of the mansion were eager and a bit wild-eyed, but the teachers and adults all managed to keep them at a controllable level all through the day.

Through a hushed conversation with Rogue during Christmas dinner Stephanie found out that Xavier's Christmas gifts were a result of the once-in-a-year-dips he traditionally made into the minds of the people living in the mansion. They were all so that he could get everyone exactly what they wanted for Christmas, and it never failed. That information managed to get Stephanie very warm inside, and more than a little teary-eyed.

After dinner she managed to get a hold on Storm, and they exchanged their gifts both wearing big smiles. She'd gotten Stephanie a luxurious-smelling shower gel, and they parted ways after a quick embrace.

She stayed up late with the Juniors that night, exchanging their Secret Santa presents and watching old Christmas movies, and when she returned to the east wing Toads room was already dark.

She went to bed – completely submerged in a feeling of content - and fell asleep immediately

* * *

**Okay. There you go. I'm fully aware of the lack of events in these two chapters, but I promise the shit hits the fan soon, soon. ****I hope you weren't too bored!**


	15. I Gotcha

**God you guys are awesome! So adorable. Your comments will keep me warm all through this icy Swedish winter, I just know it.**

**Story fun fact:** Stephanie can't really let go of her past, as you will see in this chapter (and probably have noticed before). And, later on, we will find out her past couldn't let go of her, either...

* * *

Chapter 14

**I Gotcha  
or  
before the storm**

_In her dreams she was _there _again. She was back, and he was on her, more violent and ruthless than before. She tried to back away, and then he picked it up, swung it at her, and the pain was an electric shock on her face. She was on the floor, he was on her once more, hitting her face over and over and weighing her down with his body. She couldn't get away._

Stephanie awoke with a gasp, shivering uncontrollably. The memories were too vivid, awoken once more by her unconscious, and she was terrified. She scrambled out of her bed, still trembling, and quickly got out of her room. She couldn't stay in there.

The east wing was dark and quiet. She could hear her own heartbeats hammering in her ears. Forcing herself to calm down, she drew slow breaths. She looked around for something to keep her mind off things, and found the door to Toad's bedroom slightly ajar.

Drawing another deep breath, she headed over, silently opening it wider and looking in. At least it would be interesting to see what he looked like sleeping.

Toad was in his bed, motionless, with his arms behind his neck. From a sliver of moonlight through the curtains she could see his yellow eyes, wide open, staring up at the ceiling. For a strange moment her mind told her he was dead, but then he blinked, and his eyes went to where she was standing.

It struck her how eerie the whole scene was, but it still was better than what would be waiting her in her own bed.

"Wha' d'you want?" he asked, not unkindly.

She couldn't think of anything to say. He looked at her for a moment, then sighed, and scooted over in his bed.

"Well, okay then. Can' go to bloody sleep anyway."

Stephanie felt relief wash over her, as if she had been fearing he would say no and she would have to return to her own, haunted bed.

Walking towards his bed she pulled of the worn-out oversize t-shirt she'd been sleeping in, exposing her naked upper body, and dropped it on the floor. She slid out of her panties and got into his bed, crawling towards him.

Toad grabbed her chin with one hand, stopping her, and lifted his upper body up on his elbow to examine her face.

"Why th' serious face, puppet?" he muttered, his eyes travelling quickly over her face, as if being able to read the answer there.

This, of course, caused her to smile, and then she was kissing him and he could say nothing more.

Afterwards the lay close together, Stephanie with her back pressed against his stomach, Toad propped up on one elbow and the other arm slung over her waist.

"Tha' was incredibly creepy, ye know," he muttered, looking down at her.

"What was?" she mumbled, sleepily, eyes already closed.

"You comin here and sexin' me up withou' utterin a single word."

She laughed.

"Thought ye've gone mute," he added, "which would've been a nice change, come t' think of it."

"Yeah? Well you didn't look very normal yourself, lying completely still and never blinking like that. I almost thought you were dead."

"Did ye now?" he said, interested. "And would tha' 'ave been a nice change, hm?"

Stephanie smiled.

"Not really," she turned her head to glance up at him teasingly, "well… not a _very_ nice change, at least."

He snorted and lifted his arm from her waist to draw a few string of hairs back from her jaw and she laid her head down again.

"I had a bad dream," she mumbled, answering the question he hadn't asked.

"Hm?" he muttered, putting his chin in the nape of her neck and drawing her a bit closer.

"Well," he then said, with the drowsy voice of someone about to go to sleep, "happy t' be of assistance."

Stephanie fell asleep shortly after.

* * *

That morning Stephanie had only taken one step out of Toad's room, heading for the bathroom, when Cat came storming through the entrance door.

Stephanie's insides squirmed, fear of Cat realizing what had happened during her absence overshadowing the happiness of seeing her again. She swallowed her unreasonable panic and she jogged over to great her.

"Welcome back!" she smiled.

Cat was carrying so much stuff it seemed to be breaking the laws of physics. She dumped it all, travel bag, rucksack and about a thousand plastic bags, right on the floor and stood panting.

"Thanks. I can't believe I made it up the stairs."

Stephanie stared at the massive pile.

"Is that what you brought back for everyone? Why didn't you take more turns?"

Cat waved her off dismissively.

"Seeing as I made it up it obviously was the right decision to take it all in one turn."

Stephanie nodded slowly. Then she hugged the younger girl impulsively.

"I missed you! How was your trip?"

The younger girl grinned, returning the hug and then sitting down in one of the bar stools.

"I missed you too! Oh, same old. My family's off the rocker so it was as interesting as ever."

Her face suddenly got serious.

"It was nice to see them. I don't know if you've been following the news, but I don't think I can see them again for a while. It's not safe out there."

Stephanie felt her insides chill at this. She clasped the girl's shoulder and squeezed it gently.

"I'm going for a shower, and then we can have some coffee and talk some more."

Cat nodded, and Stephanie turned to go to the bathroom. She saw Toad emerging from his bedroom and gave him a stern look.

"_Cat is here,_"she mouthed, and the slow smile on the mutant's face was wiped off clean.

He looked past Stephanie to see Cat sitting by the kitchen island.

"Morning," he muttered casually to Stephanie, and then went over to Cat's, welcoming her back.

Stephanie threw one last glance back before she stepped into the bathroom. This was it. Her small adventures with Toad were over. She tried to feel relieved, but didn't quite manage.

* * *

Cat's return led to a steady stream of people coming to visit the east wing to get their pre-ordered things, and the rest of the day was spent chatting with the different people who paused there for a while after receiving their orders.

During a long pause, when no one had come in to replace the last person to leave, Cat turned to Stephanie, seeming like she wanted a heart-to-heart.

"So?" she asked with a smile, dragging on the 'o' for a long time.

Stephanie smiled, trying not to feel nervous. Cat couldn't possibly know.

"So what?"

Cat waved a hand around impatiently.

"So how did it go? Was there any chokeholds?"

For a moment Stephanie was dead sure Cat knew about her and Toad and was shocked she could ask something like that.

_Why does she assume the sex was so kinky?_ she thought indignantly.

But it only took her a second or two to realize that Cat, of course, was referring to that other time Toad had actually choked her and was only asking if they had had any fights.

She laughed, rather nervously, but hoped desperately Cat couldn't tell.

"Oh, no, it's been all right. We even got each other presents."

She wondered if she had oversold it and practically told Cat what they had done. But the girl didn't seem to react especially, she just nodded and smiled.

"Well how nice. What did you get each other?"

As Stephanie started talking another visitor dropped by, and it seemed to be the theme for the rest of the day.

They did nothing but sit there and greet all the different people that came and went for their city-stuff, everyone from ten-year-olds to the tall blue furry man that was Hank McCoy.

Toad was away somewhere, probably at the garage, and Stephanie envied him for not having to dodge Cat's many, well-meaning questions about the holidays.

They forgot about the time this way and almost missed going down for dinner.

* * *

When Stephanie and Cat finally got down to the cafeteria they were scared they'd find it empty, but to their surprise it was full of people. Stephanie hadn't seen so many of the mansions inhabitants at once ever before, there seemed to be even more than it had been even at Christmas.

She gave Cat a surprised look, but Cat looked just as puzzled as her. Everyone had their backs at them, and the pair sneaked closer to see what they were all doing.

In complete silence everyone had their eyes on a TV on one wall, which Stephanie never had seen turned on before. When they got closer Stephanie could hear the sound from it: the calm voice from a news anchor.

"… _a terrible tragedy. At the moment the complete number of deaths has not been estimated, but it's believed to be somewhere between forty and sixty – with hundreds severely injured. Investigators believe this was an organized action, with an anti-mutant organization behind it…."_

Stephanie and Cat had stopped, and Stephanie noticed Rogue standing next to her.

Rogue turned her eyes from the TV, and Stephanie could see lines from tears all over her cheeks.

"It was the pro-mutant demonstration," Rogue whispered, "the CS bombed it."

Stephanie's insides clasped together. She stared gaping at the screen –several crying children could now be heard from the crowd around her – and the reporter's final words clung to her and made her nauseous.

_"… leaving a nation in shock, this tragic action is by many experts believed to be the starting point of several more severe anti-mutant attacks to come."_


	16. Putting Out The Fire

**All right, I think some have suspected something like this would happen ever since I introduced this specific character… but here's lots of action for ya.**

**Story fun fact:** This event was something that popped into my head almost immediately when I first started thinking about this story. I was probably swimming when it did.

Chapter 15

**Putting Out The Fire  
or  
Burns**

After requests from the children Stephanie put together a training session after the Holidays. They had all grown to miss their time in water during the few weeks that had passed since their last lesson before Christmas. Stephanie agreed, even if it wasn't planned from the start.

She knew the children had many reasons to want a distraction. Very few of them had heard from their parents since the attack. Even if the parents only had mutant children and weren't mutants themselves they were at risk of attacks from anti-mutants all over the states.

Rebecca was particularly emotional; her mother actually was a mutant, and the girl was fully aware what danger her mother was in. She looked like she'd been crying when she entered the swimming hall, but she insisted she wanted to do the lesson when Stephanie asked.

There were the same playful exercises during this particular lesson like the last – even though she knew the children had missed the lessons she was also quite sure they were neither physically nor emotionally ready for tough exercises.

They finished off with relay after a whole lot of begging from the children. They all swore they didn't mind there wasn't a prize this time – and they weren't lying. There was a hectic air about the competition that hadn't been there before, something that made Stephanie doubt if they really should be competing.

It wasn't until Rebecca was at her second lap that things went wrong. It happened very fast, she was moving strangely for only a couple of strokes, and then she panicked. She was at the far end of the track, where the pool was at its deepest.

Rebecca was suddenly splashing and screaming with all her might, so panicked she couldn't even form words. She went under the water for a second, and then surfaced; crying for her life.

Stephanie was already running along the edge of the pool, trying to get to her as fast as possible. Her stomach clenched when she saw steam rising from the water around Rebecca.

"Rebecca, calm down!" she yelled as she ran.

As the steam grew thicker she realized the water would be scorching soon.

"Get up, get up as fast as you can!" she screamed at the other children, then turning to Rebecca again, "you need to calm down, Rebecca!"

The girl was beyond hearing anything. She was crying and splashing her arms around frantically and her panic made the heat from her body grow stronger. Stephanie hesitated at the edge as she saw the water closest to Rebecca starting to boil. Her stomach clenched.

At a quick glance she saw that the other children all were out of the pool, and when she looked back at Rebecca she was under the water once again. She did not resurface.

Stephanie dove, her vision blurred by the heavy steam as she broke the surface of the scorching water.

She never knew afterwards how she managed to swim through that sea of fire and retrieve that limp body that burned her like a branding iron. It took seconds, at most, but it felt like it lasted a lifetime. When she resurfaced the children were screaming.

As she reached the edge she felt the weight of Rebecca disappear, and then she was lifted out of the water herself. She fell into a pile, only half supported by the arms that held her.

She caught sight of the bright red skin of her arms and started crying weakly. It had cracked from the heat where she had touched Rebecca, and bulging blisters were forming as she watched.

A voice was shouting out instructions and somewhere she registered coughs from Rebecca. She would have been relieved that the girl was alive if she could feel anything besides the searing pain of her skin.

The arms hastily lifted her up, and through her daze of pain she realized it was Toad. He started running with her, leaving the cries of the children behind.

She fainted for a while, but woke up as cold water hit her skin. It cooled at first, easing the pain, and she opened her eyes. Toad had brought her to the showers, and was sitting in the ice cold stream of water with her, cradling her.

"Don' worry, puppet, people are comin'," he whispered when she met his eyes.

Soon the cold of the water was too much, and it started to hurt. She cried over the pain and wanted to get out, but was too weak to fight Toad who wouldn't let her.

He held on to her as she cried weakly at his chest, making sure the freezing water ran over every part of her body. They were both shivering uncontrollably, but he didn't let her move an inch.

"Jus' keep goin', love, ye're doin' great," Toad muttered as she sobbed, "don' give up, so good. Ye're such a good girl."

He was still talking in his soothing voice when Storm and Beast arrived.

"Good work," Beast told Toad as he kneeled and opened a case on the wet tile floor, "we have called for ice packages, it is very important to cool down her skin right now."

Stephanie, who had been numbed by the cold water, could read how she must look in Storm's face. She started crying again.

She sat with Toad in the streaming cold water as they all waited for the ice packages so that she could be moved. She wasn't shivering any more, but she could no longer feel her toes or fingers. Beast and Storm was talking rapidly in low voices.

"Can ye give her anythin' for the pain?" Toad asked them.

"I don't feel it anymore," Stephanie said, but even though her body was almost completely numb she could still feel aching all over her skin.

Her lips stung and talking hurt. Toad ignored her.

"I didn't want to use a syringe," Beast hesitated, "since all her skin has been damaged."

But he quickly gave in, and gave her a shot. Stephanie didn't even feel the sting, but soon the pain ebbed away.

She was suddenly sinking, through Toad and through the floor, and then everything was a blissful black.

* * *

Stephanie resurfaced from the blackness like from water, struggling upwards until she broke through. She could see white ceiling and lamps emitting fluorescent light. The edges of her vision were broken by what she soon realized was bandages. She was too tired to feel fear about what that could mean.

For a moment she lay still, getting accustomed to the light and the continuing beeps from a close by machine. Then she started to move her head, looking around. She had never seen the room she was in before, but it looked very much like a room at a hospital.

One wall was made entirely out of glass, and through the panel curtains she could see a hallway and two other rooms that had to be like hers. The rest of her room was free of windows, emitting a feeling of being underground.

Through the glass wall she could suddenly see Beast passing, and after he had met her eyes he quickly entered the room.

"You're awake," he said with a smile as he opened the door.

The giant, bright blue man pulled a flashlight out of his pocket and shone the bright light into one of her eyes, reaching inside the bandages and lifting her eyelid gently with his thumb. He repeated the procedure on her other eye.

"What day is it?" she managed to force from dry lips.

Hank McCoy put away his flashlight with a pleased look and went to the foot of her bead. He picked up a chart and made a few notes.

"It's January third. We put you in a medical-induced coma because of the pain, but now you are well enough to be awake."

Stephanie's mind had gradually woken and at this point it was sharp enough for the realization of what had happened her to hit her.

She was still too tired to be able to remember specific pictures of burn victims, but not too tired to feel fear. She did remember that skin burns wasn't good. She would have cried if she had the strength.

"How bad is it?"

Beast put down the chart and went to sit at her bedside.

"You were actually extremely lucky to have this happen at this time, believe it or not. We'd just found a cure for Elizabeth, and since your injury had some genetic similarities with hers we were able to use the same substance on you, with only a few alternations."

He looked at her for a while in silence. She didn't care who Elizabeth was.

"What does that mean?" Stephanie whispered, and then slowly repeated her earlier words: "How bad is it?"

Beast smiled, realizing he hadn't actually answered her question.

"We injected the substance into your bloodstream and also created an ointment which we've applied to your skin. You are on your last ointment treatment right now, and exteriorly your skin is almost completely healed. We're still keeping you here to heal interiorly, but the worst damage is healed already."

She barely believed what she heard. For god' sake - she had swum in boiling water. She had emerged feeling like a broken, half melted plastic doll, like there had been nothing left of her to save.

She had seen the state of her skin. How could something like that ever go away?

"I don't understand."

"There will be some slight scarring on your forearms. The substance we use, you see, has a base of Logan's blood. Since his cells continue to regenerate - with, well, impossible speed - we've been experimenting to see if this can be applied to help heal injuries on others. It is a very complicated formula, and it has to be tailored for the specific injury, but both you and Elizabeth are living proofs of what wonders it can do. Unfortunately the skin on your forearms was most badly burnt. It's very thin and easily injured, and the heat it was exposed to was immoderate. When we applied the formula some scarring had already developed. The scarring is not extreme, but you will have it for the rest of your life."

Stephanie was almost speechless.

"That's it? I'll be fine?"

McCoy smiled again.

"It's really rather incredible. We'll remove your bandages this afternoon, and then you can see for yourself."

Stephanie spent the hours until her bandages would be taken off in a half daze, still slightly tired from the drugs and not seeing the point in forcing energy to do something else when she was still wrapped up like a mummy.

She started to get used to the room – and the smell of skin lotion mixed with something strangely metallic. She decided it was the smell of medicine, whatever that meant, and quickly understood it was coming off her own skin.

She felt almost trapped inside the thick cocoon of gauze, but tried her best to ignore that claustrophobic feeling. Sleep came to her sporadically, but it was very light and she never quite lost her awareness of her own private cocoon – and that ever-present smell.

She was drifting off, but awoke immediately when the furry blue doctor entered her room. He talked to her gently, made a few notes on his clipboard, and then started removing the gauze. He started with her arms, and she was left staring at her skin as he continued. It felt quite tender as the air hit it, and there was a pinkish hue to it, but overall the healing was remarkable.

Turning her arms and staring at the delicate skin on her forearms, she felt relief wash over her. It felt almost reassuring to see the scarring – she had been told it was the worst permanent damage her body had suffered and it was nothing. There was only a slight irregularity to the skin – and the pink was darker tinged in that area. Where the cracks in her skin had occurred there were even darker indentations.

Tears started running uncontrollably from her eyes, wetting the gauze.

Beast, who had just finished removing the gauze from her legs, looked up from his hands.

"The scars will fade eventually, in only a few months they will look a lot better."

He had believed she was upset of the scarring, when instead she was relieved. Stephanie shook her head, having trouble finding words through her tears.

"It's nothing. What happened… and it-it's nothing."

She couldn't really come up with anything else to say, but the doctor seemed to understand her. He smiled reassuringly.

"Would you like to have a mirror for when I remove the gauze from your face?"

The face looking back from the hand-held mirror was the same, slightly pink, but the same. Stephanie couldn't help recall the time when she'd looked herself in the mirror that time, so long ago now, it seemed, when her whole face had been mangled to a point beyond recognition.

That sight had terrified her, and this sight she was seeing now was like heaven compared to it. Her relief was so great she didn't quite know what to do with it; she just sat there, staring at herself, letting the feeling fill her chest until it felt like it would burst.

The blue doctor left the room quietly, leaving her to stare at her own reflection in private.

* * *

The visitors came and went at every possible hour. They'd all come when their schedules allowed it, and sometimes when it didn't.

Cat would come immediately after her lessons ended every day, sitting by Stephanie's bedside until Beast came in the evening and forced her to go to bed. Sometimes she did her homework, sometimes they talked, but it was always nice to have her there.

The X-men all came by, some only once while others, like Storm, came more regularly. The juniors came when they could, and of course Colossus, Rogue and Jubilee took extra precautions to make sure they could cheer her up a bit. Stephanie could tell Beast wasn't very pleased with those visits, but she loved them.

Even Professor Xavier came wheezing in on that strange wheelchair of his a couple of times to check up on her.

The whole mansion came by, it seemed, but time and time again she found herself hoping for only one particular face every time she looked up at the sound of the door opening. She told herself it was natural – he had saved her and she wanted to thank him. It had nothing to do with those few intimate times of theirs taking their toll on her feelings - her feelings were in check.

That conviction, of course, didn't quite explain why something in her hurt once she realized he would never come.

* * *

**YES, I totally stole the Wolvie-blood idea from Heroes. I wrote this part pretty far back and I had to come up with something once I realized how badly scarred someone would be by diving in to boiling water. It also makes sense for treating Elizabeth, who you will learn more of soon.**

**Even though I've got stories about different X-men characters in the same "universe" so to speak, I don't think I'll be using or mentioning the wolvie-blood any more, this time it felt like cheating.**

_Review, please! You guys are all so sweet it makes my teeth hurt._  
_- Poke_


	17. That Certain Female

I've been exceptionally slow. But that's what makes me a slowpoke. Get it?

**Story fun fact**: The part about Elizabeths arm is inspired from a novel in a series called Shannara-something that I read when I was only 11 or 12. I've remembered a few aspects of that book to this day though the major plot is forgotten. The man with an arm slowly turning to stone was a main character in this specific book and was featured on the cover. A very beautiful, tragic and frightening story the way I remember it. So yeah, not taking any credit from that idea.

* * *

Chapter 16

**That Certain Female  
or  
A different night terror**

It didn't take long for her to be allowed to get out of bed. She was still to stay on the hospital floor as long as she was getting the injections, but she could get out of bed a few times and walk some short distances if she liked.

At first she didn't quite see the point of it; there seemed to be nothing of interest outside of her room. Her room, at least, had a TV and a few books Cat had brought her. But she soon got restless and after a while she decided she could at least be bored walking around.

Leaving her room she came right into a long hallway, which to her left ended with a white door labeled: OPERATING ROOMS and in the far right with a pair of elevator doors.

The rooms connected with the hallway that weren't supply closets all had glass walls, like hers, and she decided to inspect them as a way to pass time. They were mostly dark, a few were office rooms for the medical staff and the others were patient rooms. At that particular time there were almost no people being treated, and due to it being just about lunchtime the place was near well deserted.

A nurse she didn't know passed her with a smile and headed into one room that was actually lit, and Stephanie peeked in. She recognized one of the boys from Cat's group of friends, but could not recall his name. She remembered Cat telling her he'd gotten the flu. He was sleeping as the nurse fussed about in his room, and Stephanie couldn't really evoke any care to talk to him, so she kept on strolling.

She kept her pace slow, mostly because she'd been in bed for a while and didn't feel all that strong, but also because she was wearing only a flimsy hospital gown and a pair of loose-fitting socks. Beast had said she couldn't wear anything tight until the treatment was finished – just to be safe.

She thought she saw a light from another room, and headed there curiously.

_It's that girl McCoy mentioned_, she thought, trying to recall her name but failing.

Her curiosity grew stronger as she sneaked closer to the glass wall of her room. A few more steps and she'd be able to see her. She stopped when she was close by, not wanting to intrude, and slowly leaned forward to get a peek.

She leaned back so quickly it made her head spin - shocked to the core by what she had seen.

She'd seen the woman only briefly, a sweet face framed by auburn hair. She'd been in bed, her one arm connected to a bunch of wires. That arm had been grey and petrified – like stone – making Stephanie quickly recall the conversation she'd had with Storm about the mutants they'd found in the CS building. Her other arm, very normal looking, had been slightly bent as her hand was held by Toad's.

He'd been sitting by her bedside, leaning forward as if to hear her better, while she with a smile told him something Stephanie couldn't hear. None of them had noticed her.

The pain in her chest was ridiculous, but overwhelming. Stephanie had been leaning against the wall, hiding from the couple's view and trying to process what she'd seen.

Silently pushing herself off the wall, she started walking on shaking legs back to her room. She wanted out of there now. She took deep breaths as she was reaching her room. The initial panic and pain was subsiding into a burning anger. At herself, for being so goddamn stupid.

Hadn't she been warning herself not to get emotional all along? At him. He could come visit that woman, and not her?

_I only almost died, so, hey, no need to pop in and check if I've got any skin left, _her pissed off brain hissed inside her.

And of course she was angry at that fucking woman. Her train of thought suddenly made her feel like a lovesick schoolgirl, which, not surprisingly, made her even madder.

Once inside her room she twisted the panel curtains to block out any views from people outside, put on her TV with the sound on max and for a moment let her tears run freely. Then she shut them off.

* * *

"Things better between you two?" Cat asked her, out of the blue laying down her homework and looking up.

Stephanie's treatment was finished, and she was lying fully dressed on the hospital bed, waiting for Beast to come and dismiss her. Cat had come to accompany her to _her return to the freak wing_, as she had put it.

Cat didn't have to elaborate her question for Stephanie to understand who she meant.

_Does she know?_ Stephanie thought for a panicked moment, images of everything from their steamy nights to that painful sight outside the woman's patient room flickering before her eyes.

Then she dismissed it all, Cat couldn't know. Careful to keep a light tone she said:  
"Why do you ask?"

Cat raised an eyebrow.

"Well, he kind of saved your life…"

Stephanie felt her cheeks go red. _Right. _

"Yeah, that was incredible of him - I owe him so much."

Cat waved with her hand to make Stephanie stop talking. She obeyed.

"I was just kidding; of course you know what he did!"

She flashed a grin and continued:  
"No, what I meant was how he was acting while you were unconscious in here. You should have seen him! He kept walking back and forth, never sitting down, and he was awfully pale. He wouldn't admit to it, of course, but I could tell he was worried sick!"

Stephanie felt sudden warmth spreading in her chest at those words, some of her hurt fading.

"Well, that was sweet of him. We did manage the Holiday quite okay; you could say we weren't enemies anymore. And we're especially not after all this."

"That's great! Oh, you should have seen him. I tried to calm him down, tell him what a survivor you are, you know?"

Stephanie got a terrible premonition, but Cat talked on, words flowing endlessly as always.

"And I told him all about when you first came here. You know, how banged up you were - you could barely walk, and your face was a mess – and how you still managed all right."

Stephanie could only feel a sudden coldness in the pit of her stomach, the earlier feeling of warmth vanished.

_Oh, Cat_.

She managed a smile.

"That was a nice thing to say about me. Did it calm him down?"

The younger girl didn't notice the stiffness in her voice, and Stephanie was glad. She hoped for a different answer, but she was terribly sure what Cat would say. Toad would connect dots where Cat hadn't, add this info to her night terrors and make a stupid accurate guess about what had really happened to her.

Cat frowned.

"That's the strange part! He stopped the walking thing but he got, like, freakishly quiet. I'm actually not sure if it helped or not."

And that was Stephanie's confirmation. The last thing she'd ever wanted Toad to find out Cat had told him, without even realizing what she had been doing.

"That's odd," Stephanie managed with a stiff smile - feeling somewhat like her whole world had just fallen apart.

* * *

Coming back to her normal routines was bliss, but it also meant having to deal with Toad. Stephanie's emotions were very mixed at this point, and the whole deal with him made her almost crazy.

He had saved her life. She had, let's face it, long before that started to fall for him. And he had saved her life. She was indebted to him, grateful for everything.

But then he hadn't visited. Not even once. He had instead spent his time making lovey dovey with the woman called Elizabeth. And even if he had been worried about her – according to what Cat had said – he had obviously prioritized that other woman. Who was she to him?

It was the place her thoughts went after that which caused Stephanie to decide. She went cold thinking about what Toad surely had to know about now – the reason she ran out of bed to throw up in the middle of the night; her night terrors that were so vivid she sometimes dreaded her own bed.

Thinking about _that event, _she had almost started to forget it at times now, she didn't really know what she'd been thinking. She was too broken a woman – too much of a mess – to be acting the way she had been.

Getting drunk, flirting and sleeping with her neighbor, things like that were for people who didn't have to deal with issues like hers. She had been pushing her past away, when the only thing she should be focused on should be staying safely hidden and mentally healthy. How much thought had she put into any of those two lately?

And this made her decide. The safest way to deal with her life right now – the only way – was to avoid Toad. That was what she did. She let her life go on without him. She kept hanging out with Cat, and the X-juniors, and after no more than a week she went back to her swimming lessons.

Rebecca had quit, but come to tell Stephanie about it beforehand. They talked it all out and Stephanie made sure the girl saw she was fine so Rebecca wasn't overcome with guilt, but secretly she was happy the girl had decided to quit. If the event ever had repeated itself Stephanie wasn't sure if she would have jumped in again that time, and that thought was scary.

Toad seemed to have changed his swimming schedule, and this both relieved and hurt Stephanie. Him not showing up after her lessons shrunk the amount of times they saw each other to a minimum. She wanted to avoid him, but something stung when she realized he avoided her, too.

Stephanie tried to spend as much time as she could in her room, but sometimes Cat wanted company and she didn't want to make her suspicious. At times like those, when the two of them sat by the kitchen island and talked or worked separately, she could always feel Toads eyes on her.

Once, when they had accidentally been alone in the wing, he had said her name. Stephanie had looked up, realizing he was about to say something, and hurried off into her room. If it was the look on her face, her quick departure or the sound of her door locking shut Stephanie wasn't sure, but after that he didn't try to talk to her again.

Stephanie and Toad managed to keep this new stranger-relationship of theirs up for about two and a half weeks.

* * *

This night the nightmare was different. It had appeared in her head like scenes from a movie before, images stuck forever in her head coming to life in her dreams. This night it were the emotions of that event - now long ago - that haunted her, blurry images and specks of lights accompanied by an immobilizing fear.

She didn't hear any words or noises like she usually did – not even her own screams, which had always been in the background of her nightmares before. There were only the strange blurry images and the terrified feelings.

Stephanie awoke crying, more shocked to the core than ever before. Her mind wasn't as full with clear memories, but she was terrified. The fear that planted itself on her during her sleep had caught a hold, and it wouldn't let go even though she knew she was safe.

The terrified cramps in her stomach made her sure she would throw up, and she ran for the bathroom. Kneeling in front of the stool she waited, but nothing happened. And the fear didn't leave.

She sat down on the cold floor, her body starting to shake uncontrollably. Hugging her knees to try and still her convulsing muscles she felt tears trickling down her cheeks.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and she jumped at first, then she realized it was Toad.

"Wha's goin' on?" he asked with a low voice, as not to startle her even more.

She started crying for real and was unable to answer him. She had put it all behind her, she had, but the massive, overcoming feeling of fear would not leave. She felt a soothing hand stroking her hair.

"Sh, sh. 's allright."

Toad knelt beside her, reaching with an arm behind her back and drawing her nearer. He put his other hand beneath her legs and lifted her. Stephanie could feel nothing besides the suffocating fear; it was like every other emotion in her body had died. Toad carried her to his room and all she could do was keep crying and fighting to breathe.

He carried Stephanie to his bed and sat leaning on the bed frame with her in his lap. He pulled the comforter up around them and kept hushing her in a quiet voice. As he kissed the top of her head and started rubbing her back, the tears and the shaking started to subside.

She leaned into his chest, the fabric of his shirt wet from her tears, waiting for her muscles to relax and the cramp to leave her stomach.

After what felt like an eternity she was breathing normally again, and the tight grip she had on Toad's shirt had loosened. Shortly after she fell asleep.

* * *

When she woke the room was still dark, and the calm feeling that had led her to fall asleep was within moments replaced by embarrassment. What had she done?

She'd been promising herself to stay away, and yet she'd fallen across him like a scared puppy he was forced to calm down. She was a sniveling, psychotic mess and at that instant she felt an almost suffocating shame.

Carefully, so she wouldn't wake him, she made a move to slide out of his bed. Her heart pounded with the embarrassment, filling her ears with the sound of its beating. The arm Toad had slung about her waist held her firmer than she'd expected, and she stopped for a while to think about how she should proceed without waking him up.

Her next try was a tad more forceful, but unsuccessful. At last she tried with all her might and when she didn't move an inch it became painfully obvious he was awake.

She gave off half a whimper, suddenly more ashamed than she could ever imagine being.

"Was it th' accident?" his voice came gently from behind her.

It took a while for her to realize he was asking if that was what had caused her night terror. She felt relief at this simple way out, and nodded.

"Yeah," she said, figuring that was all she had to say.

When he didn't say anything she tried to get away once more, but his arm was firm. He pulled her back a bit, pressing her closer to his chest.

"So it wasn'," he stated into her ear, and she didn't answer.

He was treading on ground she didn't want to acknowledge.

The room was filled with silence for a painfully long time, and Stephanie felt fear building up inside her of what he would say. Her eyes stared blindly out into the darkness, and all her senses could catch was the feel of his touch, his steady heartbeat against her back, and his smell all around her.

She could barely hear his breathing, but it was there, slow and even.

"Someone hurt you," he finally stated, softly.

It shattered something inside her.

She was silent, but not for very long, until she drew a long, shaky breath. She tried to find strength in the air pouring into her lungs, strength she so desperately needed to be able to relive those years and that one night.

She wasn't sure where to start.

"His name was Gabriel."

* * *

**If you've been jonesing for Stephanie's past you should start getting excited for the next chapter!**

**Until then**  
**- Poke**


	18. About Her

**Hi, peeps!**  
Recently, I found out how fun photoshop can be - especially if you imagine your character looking like a celebrity (and I almost always do). I spent several hours yesterday putting Creed's head onto another guys body so it could look like he was interacting with the actress I imagine that certain OC like. It was ridiculously fun.

When I was posting this chapter I realised I haven't let you guys find out how I imagine Stephanie - and I should. So here we go.

**I've always though of her as Margot Robbie - **the gorgeous blonde from the Pan Am tv series. Incredibly beautiful, sometimes something fragile about her, and probably capable of looking like a complete bitch if you don't know her well enough. _Why did you think Toad reacted the way he did at first? _It is hard describing a character out of their own eyes - and this has all been from Steph's pov (so now I guess I cheated a bit).

**Anyway, I got to work and made a small picture with these two characters to go with this story. **Since there wasn't a very wide assortment of Toad-pictures out there I found one of Ray Park (heh... did anyone actually get that one until now?) and Toad-ed him up a bit. I'm fully aware I'm no master, but I have an illegal amount of fun doing things like this**. Click on the picture so you can see it in a bigger scale.**

**... onwards!**

* * *

Chapter 17**  
About Her  
or  
The Political Career of Stephanie Park**

The story of Stephanie's mistakes was a painful one to tell. Looking back, it was obvious every single time she'd treaded wrong, and it killed her she'd been so stupid. There wasn't even really anyone for her to blame but herself_. _

_At least I paid my price_, she thought, before taking another breath and shakily beginning.

She'd grown up with loving parents, who'd not in any way pushed her into doing something she didn't want. They supported her in taking her own decisions, and when she reached her teens they already trusted her judgment completely. On top of that she'd never had any trouble finding friends, and all of this, perhaps, gave her a tad too much self-confidence.

When she was fifteen her best friend was Maggie Howard, and when Maggie got her first boyfriend during summer break Stephanie was so jealous it made her teeth hurt. Maggie had met her boyfriend at church, which her parents saw to it that she attended at least once a week. As it were the girl's parents were not only highly religious, but also extremely anti-mutant, and therefore the church Maggie regularly attended was the anti-mutant Church of Humanity.

Stephanie's intention when going along to one of the CoH's youth meetings was, to start with, to see if this boyfriend of Maggie's had any cute friends. She reasoned that if she got a boyfriend for herself fast enough, she and Maggie would be on the same level once more. She had planned to be only introduced to Maggie's boyfriend, not to fall heads over heels in love with him.  
Gabriel Keller was tall and blond, with strong arms and a stunning smile. He was twenty years old (but Maggie's parents thought it was all right because he went to their church), and unlike any of the boys Stephanie had met before. There was seriousness about him, an air that gave the impression he would one day do great things, and his eyes were sky blue and painfully beautiful. From that day on there was suddenly no boy that could fill Stephanie's requirements, and the only one she wanted was taken. He, on the other hand, seemed to barely know she existed.

She started accompanying Maggie to the church every Sunday, so she could see Gabriel more, and so that perhaps one day he could see her. Somehow, part of Gabriel's allure was that he didn't notice her – she, who had always been noticed! Her heart ached with the impossible love every time she saw him. Her parents were slightly worried by this new pastime of hers at first, but they didn't want to force her to anything, so she was allowed to continue going. She had never had any harsh feelings against mutants, but some of the things the reverent preached about seemed to make sense.

The turn came when she was listening in on a conversation between Gabriel and one of his friends. Maggie was standing beside Gabriel, agreeing with nods and different wordless sounds to the various anti-mutant arguments, and Stephanie was trying to do the same. At some point there came an argument she knew, and without a thought she blurted a quote she'd heard or read a few months back. The appreciative smile Gabriel gave her made her heart stop. It was as if he suddenly noticed she was even there.  
After this Stephanie wasted no time reading up on the subject. Her fiery crush made the long texts interesting to devour, and she memorized quotes and arguments easily – it was what _he _believed. It all started making sense to her, and the energy with which she did all this surprised even her.

Gabriel started noticing her more and more, and every time she dared to put an argument into a discussion and he agreed it felt as if her chest would explode with pride. Maggie never noticed anything, not even when Gabriel asked Stephanie to join the newly founded Clearance Society, and not her. She wasn't quite as fanatical as them, she'd tease them sometimes, and when Stephanie saw how Gabriel frowned at this she started doing it too.

The CS back then was a small organization that was growing rapidly. They were known by outsiders as a group of extremists with a mostly younger crowd. Their anti-mutant actions were extreme and often more than shady, but Stephanie saw none of this as something wrong. By then she was too absorbed in making those rare moments when Gabriel really noticed her happen. As her conviction to the organization grew, so did Gabriel's appreciation of her.

Almost a year after Stephanie had first laid her eyes on him – by then she was sixteen and he was twenty-one – Gabriel found her alone at the CS headquarters. It was getting late, and she had offered to stay behind to help with some filing.

She was surprised to see him, seeing as everyone else had gone home and she had been sure he was meeting Maggie that night, but overjoyed nonetheless. Her heart was beating furiously when he greeted her with a smile, and he offered to help her finish the filing. They chatted while they worked, and somehow his eyes never really seemed to leave hers. Within less than fifteen minutes he had taken her virginity on the cold floor.

She asked him to leave Maggie, which he soon did, and shortly after they were a couple. That small victory of finally having a boyfriend - even stealing Maggie's – was not of importance to her anymore. Neither did she care that she'd lost her friend because of it. What was any of it, when she at sixteen already had found the love of her life? If her parents had gotten worried by now it didn't matter, she had stopped listening to them and she was barely home anyway. She got her own place when she turned eighteen and after that she barely spoke to them. Too much else was going on in her life and their careful inquiries had started to annoy her.

The organization grew, and the purposeful Gabriel came with ideas and prepositions that quickly made him rise to the top. Stephanie was asked to model in brochures and flyers which soon lead to television-interviews. Suddenly they were the power-couple above all others - and she was madly in love.

It wasn't until she was about to reach her twenties that she started to look beyond Gabriel and her other friends within the CS. It didn't all start with the press conference in which Charles Xavier had been attending, and afterwards spoken with her about her choices in life. No, that time she had snapped and spat insults at him, causing a grand scene when several CS members cheered her on. But gradually, the change came.  
In some way she started noticing the chaos they had caused, and it frightened her. Perhaps it was that her initial, childish crush on Gabriel had started to fade, and that what was left didn't cover the horrors.

When she tried to carefully pull back from the inner circle of the CS it was quickly noticed. The retaliation was harsh and during an argument Gabriel actually hit her. Afterwards he said he was sorry, but it was enough to make her realize what she'd gotten herself into. It took almost a year for her to build up her courage to leave, and it was regularly torn down by fights with Gabriel that got more and more violent.

The event that made the ticking bomb that was her life go off was such a small thing, really. That day Stephanie caught several CS members harassing a mutant child. The child's parents were nowhere to be seen, and even though they were standing outside in broad daylight the CS's reputation made by-walkers too afraid to do or say anything. When one of the men suddenly got physical in his harassments something in Stephanie snapped. She told them off, and because of their surprise the small child was able to escape. When Gabriel found out about it, and asked her to come over, she was sure he would break up with her. She was actually relieved. When she arrived, though, he only started screaming at her. It wasn't until she was screaming back that he started pushing her.

His earlier violent outbursts had been small, controlled, and the sheer force he was attacking her with almost paralyzed her. At one point he picked up a heavy table lamp and started hitting her with it, shattering her cheekbone and damaging a few of her ribs. When the lamp was too broken to be of any use he threw her on his bed and raped her. It took four times before he could no longer get an erection, her screams filling the apartment the entire time. The building he lived in mostly inhabited CS members - and the screams only went to deaf ears.

Gabriel Keller sent her home a limping, broken shell of who she had once been, and told her worse was to come if she ever did something like that again. The strongest feeling she had at those words was not fear, but disappointment that she wasn't free from him. That, more than anything, caused her decision.

* * *

She told Toad all of this as the darkness in his bedroom slowly faded and the morning came. She had stopped crying when she finished, and his grip around her had tightened until it almost hurt.

When she turned to face him, his grip automatically loosened, and she sought his eyes to see his reaction. It was still too dark, and his silence scared her somewhat.

"Mortimer?" she asked carefully.

As her eyes adjusted to the shadows, she could read a strange, bare expression of confusion in his eyes. She wasn't sure how to interpret it. Carefully, she eased closer.

She reached for his lips with hers, and they met with a tenderness that was new for them both. It awoke strange, fluttering feelings inside of her.

She broke it, to be able to see his face once more - and perhaps read something out of it. But the confused look was the same, only it was almost detached now.

He reached out with one hand to stroke her hair, frowning.

"Ye're not disgusted by me," he finally said.

She couldn't hide her surprise.

"What?"

His hand came to rest on her waist. He was still frowning when he looked at her face, searching for words. It seemed like it all was very difficult for him.

"'s always been like tha'," he mumbled ",not jus' with girls, with everyone."

He seemed to still be thinking of what to say, and Stephanie stayed quiet, studying his face with anticipation. There came a slightly bitter smile to his lips as he continued.

"There were some, 'course, who _wanted _t' be disgusted for a while, 'n I let 'em. 'n after I only felt even more…" he went quiet, and then continued: "… only felt worse."

Stephanie could only think of the scars all over his body, now almost familiar to her. She felt something prickling in the corner of her eyes but she ignored it. Then he met her eyes, looking like he was about to reach what he'd been leading up to all along.

"Ye're not like tha'. Not… disgusted."

Her own, dark memories were washed away when she kissed him again.

"You're beautiful," she stated at his lips, and he snorted at her choice of words but pulled her closer.

* * *

**Also I'm thinking of starting a deviantart account for the only purpose to be able to post pictures I've put together with the characters of my stories and linking to them here. **Is anyone at all interested in something like that, or should I just keep random stuff like that to myself?

**Please let me know if you'd care about something along that way!  
- Poke**


	19. Foolish Heart

**Warning: following chapter is very light/fluffy and gooey. Don't worry though, there's still five or six chaps left until this show is over.**

**Story fun fact:** Just after the last chapter was where I got a 6-month writer's block. I knew where I wanted things to go and I had even written part of the last chapter and the entire epilogue, but I just couldn't find the motivation to write the part leading up to the end. This chapter is where I got back up on that horse!

* * *

Chapter 18**  
Foolish Heart  
or  
Busted**

The air was bone-chillingly cold and the snow was hard to form properly, loose powder falling between her fingers. Stephanie blew out a cloud of steamy breath and bent forward to press the snow together with all her weight in it.

She managed partly, and was about to examine her fine work when a shovelful of powdery snow hit her forcefully by the side of her head. The surprise and blow combined caused her to fall sideways into the snow.

Cat's part-hidden face came into view above her, and the young mutant's voice was muffled through her scarf when she spoke.

"You all right there, Steph?"

Stephanie spat out some snow, trying to ignore the chilling feeling of snow clumps that had found their way inside her neckline and were melting against her bare skin.

"I'll live," she muttered dryly.

Cat's needle-thin pupils travelled over Stephanie's face once, and then her eyes squinted maliciously. Stephanie managed to roll to the side before Cat emptied another shovel of snow to the exact spot her face had been a second earlier.

She got up to her feet and jumped the other girl before she had time to react. Climbing onto her back like a monkey and hanging on for dear life, Stephanie started cursing loudly.

"I'll get you, you little rat!"

Cat was spending too much concentration containing her wild laughter to be able to balance properly. She had a few inches on Stephanie and would probably have been able to stay on her feet for much longer if she hadn't been laughing so hard.

The spontaneous snow fight just outside of the mansion was involving almost every single inhabitant below twenty-five, and was also incredibly anarchic. There were no teams or rules and the few alliances that were made were broken almost immediately.

The older ones showed some caution around the smaller children, but none around each other. Iceman, for instance - who had only minutes before been throwing lethal soccer-sized balls of ice at Colossus metallic head - was now almost gently dipping an eight-year old girl head-first into a pile of snow.

Stephanie had due to her inability to create a decent snowball fled the more intense fighting and had been standing in the outskirts when Cat had ambushed her.

In her monkey-like state Stephanie had now managed to crawl around to Cat's front, and when Cat fell backwards into a pile of snow she quickly straddled her chest.

She started using her hands to shovel snow into the mutants face, taking extra care to push the icy powder down her shirt. Cat's shrill screams mingled with dozen others.

"Time!" Cat suddenly called. "I can't breathe!"

Stephanie stopped shoveling snow and fell off Cat, landing on her back next to her. They both lay panting in silence for a while.

"Is anyone coming?" Cat finally managed. "I don't have it in me to get up just yet."

Stephanie lifted her head and looked around. The chaos was still on, but they were in the outskirts and no one was looking their way. She pulled herself up to a sitting position.

"We're safe for now. Truce?"

Stephanie found her half-finished snowball lying forgotten in the snow and started working on it again. Cat took a deep breath and sat up as well.

"Truce. Is that Toad over there?"

Though his green-hued skin was covered from tip to toe in thick clothing Stephanie instantly knew it was him. By now she could have recognized his build - and the way he walked – anywhere.

She hadn't really talked to him after that night, she'd sneaked to the showers early that morning after a hasty kiss, and when she was done Cat was up and he was gone. She could see that he was coming from the garage – but that was probably where she would have guessed he had been at anyway.

"Oi!" Cat called to him, and when he saw them he came over.

He had his hands plunged deep into his pockets and though he was wearing double layers of sweatshirts his arm muscles were still clearly visible through the fabric. There definitely was something about his arms.

Stephanie was wearing a borrowed down jacket and she was suddenly realizing it probably made her look fat. The thought was unreasonable, but still made her panic slightly.

Toad had both hoods up and his face was the only part of him exposed to the cold air, but his cheeks didn't look rosy at all. Stephanie wasn't sure if that had something to do with the hue of his skin or if he really was amphibian. She had no idea, but her curiosity vanished when his yellow eyes met hers and she saw they were near-well glittering with a hidden smile.

Heat crept up her face and she realized she must be blushing furiously. She quickly averted her eyes, but couldn't help smiling.

"I see ye've taken part of th' war?" Toad smiled with his mouth now, looking down at their snow-covered forms where they were sitting.

"We took a break," Cat admitted, "our bodies aren't as strong as they used to be."

Toad grinned, and caught Stephanie's eyes once more. This made her face burn even hotter, and she looked away again. The whole situation seemed to give him endless amusement.

"Well, I'm headin' in for lunch. Try t'not get yerselves killed."

He started walking, and as he passed Stephanie he said in an offhand way:

"Allright there, love? Lookin rather red."

Stephanie stared gaping at him. Mocking her like that! She suddenly remembered the ball of hard-packed snow in her hand, almost finished now, and at the same time he seemed to notice it too.

His face looked worried for a second.

"Ye're not going t' throw that at me when I walk away, I hope?"

Her face burst into a grin and she made a show of carefully putting the ball down.

"Of _course_ not! You never throw_ anything_ at Toad from behind," she said.

He grinned, nodded to them both and turned away.

Stephanie gave him a few paces before she carefully got to her feet and picked up the snowball. She had a fairly good aim and was trying for right between his shoulder blades. It wasn't like he didn't know she was going to throw it.

Just as she was about to throw Cat said in an accusing manner:

"You guys _did it_, didn't you?"

The surprise made her throw a bit off, and the snowball hit Toad right at the back of his hooded head. She stared gaping at Cat, who was standing arms-crossed and looking at her in a way a displeased mother would look at a child who'd made a mess.

Her mind was trying to recollect itself and find the best way to go from here; should she lie? Should she say she was sorry?

Her mind didn't get to finish it's planning, because suddenly a strong force brought her right down in the snow.

The powder whirled around them and the vengeful Toad was laughing on top of her, just about to rise to go off her. Probably before things got too obvious – but his face was so close and he was smiling and _what the hell, Cat already knows._

Stephanie grabbed Toad by the neck with both her hands and pulled him down towards her roughly, placing a wet kiss on his lips. They were much colder than hers, and the snow on them melted on her tongue.

He was surprised, surely, but not really thinking, and kissed her back in a way that made her forget just about everything until Cat's high voice stated:

"I _knew_ you guys did it!"

Stephanie started laughing and she had to quit the kissing.

Because she was still laughing her whole mouth filled with snow when Toad scooped a handful at her face.

She started waving her arms and legs uncontrollably to get it off, accompanied by Cat's half-amused, half-annoyed:  
"This is just ridiculous!"

Toad brushed the snow out of her face with a bare hand, laughing all the while.

"Bastard," Stephanie muttered with a smile, so that it didn't really take.

"Ye don't ever throw anythin' at me from behind," he grinned.

He didn't seem to care that Cat knew about them, and it made Stephanie all warm and gooey inside.

When he gave her a light peck it was accompanied by several wolf whistles. The pair stopped abruptly to look at the war zone, where all the fighters had stopped what they were doing to look at them.

"You guys are so incredibly busted!" Cat laughed maliciously.

* * *

"My first question," Jubilee said, hands raised to silence the others; "you've been boinking the green fellow for how long?"

Rogue slapped her arm.

"At least call him Toad!"

"Or Mort," Cat said helpfully, "and that was exactly what was going to be _my _first question, you know."

She finished her sentence with a glare at Stephanie, who twisted uncomfortably in her seat.

She had had lunch with Toad, an act that felt in some ways like a date, and during the entire time focused mainly on avoiding eye contact with anyone from the table of people staring at them. Stephanie's friends had all seated themselves at a table close by, and spent that half hour watching them and most likely talking about them.

When neither she nor Toad had anything left to scrape of their plates they had simultaneously looked at that table, both sighing.

"They're going to ask questions," Stephanie had muttered.

Toad had nodded slowly without saying anything.

"We shouldn't label it, right? No labels."

Toad had looked at the group of people once more.

"Puppet, if you lemme sneak back to th' garage and take on tha' monstrosity by yerself, I'll let ye label it any way ye want."

Stephanie had liked that idea.

"Let me think about that. I'll come back to you with a label."

Toad had nodded.

"Sounds good."

Stephanie had taken a few deep breaths and then stared that entire group of people down.

"Go. I'll hold them off."

And after Toad had sneaked away successfully Stephanie had found herself trapped at a table with Cat, Rogue, Jubilee and – surprisingly enough – Colossus, getting bombarded with questions. At the moment though, they had all quieted down and was waiting for her answer.

"How long?" Stephanie said hesitantly. "Ah, since that poker night. When you had left to celebrate Christmas," she added in Cat's direction, making the younger girl _humpf _indignantly.

The whole ordeal was embarrassing, of course, but seemed inevitable after the events out in the snow. She decided it was probably easier to answer their questions straight up.

"And you're continuing with it?" Rogue asked curiously.

"For the time being, at least," she answered truthfully.

"What if you wreck it? There's gonna be a real strange vibe up in our wing," Cat said irritably.

Stephanie shrugged.

"Well, we didn't _plan_ it. I tried not to. And since it was already awkward then it's probably too late now."

Cat seemed dissatisfied with the answer, but leaned back in her chair without saying anything. She crossed her arms and looked rather sullen, but Stephanie was sure she was mostly annoyed about not being told right away. She'd get over it soon enough.

"And you're both okay with… each other?" Colossus suddenly asked after being silent for a long time.

The strange question was actually rather difficult, and Stephanie sighed.

"What I used to do and what he used to do, it's in the past. My past, certainly – though I can't vouch for him. We had a lot of issues at first – Cat could tell you – but we're over it."

"I'd say…" Jubilee snorted. "Are you boinking other people?"

Rogue smacked her again.

"Stop saying boink!"

Jubilee waved her away, and stared at Stephanie.

"Well, are you?"

"Uh…"

Rogue was the one who reacted first on Stephanie's uncertainty.

"You haven't talked about that?"

The thought of that woman in that hospital bed, Elizabeth, suddenly came back to Stephanie's mind. She hadn't thought about her at all since the night before. What was his deal with Elizabeth? He _had _acknowledged the relationship between him and Stephanie – hadn't he?

"Well", Cat said, "if they aren't planning on working down the entire mansion there aren't really that many other options – no offence to you, Steph. We're all stuck in here right now."

Jubilee looked at Stephanie suspiciously.

"Are there any other people at the mansion one of you might like to boink?"

"_Jubes!_"

"Oh god I'm _sorry,_ Rogue, 'make sweet love to'? That better?"

Stephanie sat silent. She didn't know what to say. No? Maybe? They'd hammer her with more questions if she said _he _might want to. But what if she said no, and later he ended up with that Elizabeth girl. Would he? Her stomach suddenly turned.

"No. I don't know - I don't think so," she sputtered.

Jubilee sat back in her stool.

"You better check yo' self before you wreck yo' self," she muttered, waving her finger around.

"That's not even in the right context," Rogue sighed.

Jubilee snorted, and then looked curiously at Stephanie again, who felt her cheeks redden.

"Now about that tongue-"

"I'm leaving," Stephanie interrupted her.

And then, face burning, she fled the cafeteria.


	20. Let's Stay Together

**If my calculations are correct there are four chappies and one epilogue left after this one. ****Dum dum dum.**

* * *

Chapter 19**  
Let's Stay Together  
or  
Labels**

She was on her laptop when Toad came into the wing later that afternoon. He had a look in his eyes, something almost shiny, that for some silly reason made her heart jump just a bit.

"Ye've got a moment?" he asked, almost breathlessly, as if he'd hurried there.

Stephanie couldn't help grinning back at him.

"Sure."

When he as if without a thought grabbed her hand, her mind went immediately to the subject of labeling. He had said she could label it any way she wanted. Did that mean she could tell him it'd be just the two of them? No other people? What about that other woman? Perhaps she should just tell him they'd label it 'seeing where this is going' or something unspecific like that.

_I think too much._

But what Toad did then turned her reasoning all upside down. He took her down to the hospital floor to see Elizabeth.

He looked shy when they walked in through the doorway to her room, still holding her hand.

Elizabeth was in her bed, her petrified arm under the same treatment as before, but it seemed better than the last time Stephanie had seen it, more human-colored now.

Seeing her up close made Stephanie feel rather ridiculous, the woman was sweet-looking, but somewhere in her early 50s. It was farfetched to assume she and Toad had had any sort of romantic involvement. Elizabeth's whole face lit up when she noticed them entering.

"Mortimer! Is this her?"

Stephanie's cheeks burned when she realized Toad had been talking with Elizabeth about her. She let go of Toad's hand to be able to introduce herself to the older woman.

"My name is Stephanie," she said, squeezing her healthy hand ",you must be Elizabeth?"

The brown-haired woman smiled, the corners of her eyes wrinkling.

"Has that boy been running around talking about me? Sit down, please. I've wanted to meet you for quite some time."

Stephanie obliged, seating herself at the bedside chair and Toad silently sat down at a small stool next to her.

"Not as much as he should have," Stephanie said honestly, "I hope he's only told you good things about me?"

Elizabeth's kind - and motherly - ways made it quite obvious what sort of part she'd played in Toad's life for the last year or more. It made Stephanie sort of nervous about being introduced.

The woman laughed.

"Mostly good."

"Then he couldn't have been talking that much about me," Stephanie joked, earning a grin from Toad.

"Oh, well," Elizabeth started contradicting, but Toad quickly interrupted her:  
"Elizabeth and I had cells right next t' each other. At the CS."

Elizabeth nodded, and Stephanie felt herself stiffen, though the pair seemed oddly relaxed talking about their former imprisonment.

"Bonding over the bars," Elizabeth joked, and then noticed Stephanie's expression, "oh, there's no need, darling, I knew all about your past. The transformation is what I care about. From what Mortimer told me you've worked hard to put that all behind you, it's impressive. I hear you were the reason we were released, too?"

Stephanie saw surprise in Toad's face when she nodded. Apparently he hadn't known that.

"I'm glad you feel that way," she told Elizabeth.

They sat talking with Elizabeth for a few hours, mostly about the pair's time in the CS cells. It was unspoken, but never the less obvious, that Elizabeth was the one who had worked off the rougher edges of Toad.

If he hadn't spent all that time with her he probably never would have agreed to stay at the X-mansion after his release. She was a lovely woman, and Stephanie was warm inside when they left her.

"How far until her arm is good?" Stephanie asked Toad when they walked through the hospital floor to the elevator.

The hallway reminded her of the time she had spent there herself.

"Th' medicine is workin' faster 'n faster," Toad said, smiling when she intertwined her fingers with his, "at this rate th' Beast thinks she'll be out of th' infirmary in a few weeks."

"That's great," Stephanie said earnestly.

She had taken a real liking to Elizabeth in those few hours. They waited for the elevator and Toad lifted her hand to his mouth, kissing her fingers.

"She liked ye," he said, and Stephanie lit up.

She was still smiling when they entered the elevator, and when the doors were closing she turned to him.

"I thought of a label," she said.

Toad looked at her.

"And?" he said curiously, his voice very different from the carefree tone he had used on the matter earlier that day.

Stephanie looked down at their fingers, still interlaced, and then back at him. It was silly the way her stomach felt every time she looked at him.

"Honest-to-god relationship, boyfriend and girlfriend," she said, thinking she was really throwing it all out there.

"No boinking other people," she added quickly.

"If that's wha' ye want," Toad said, trying and failing to sound nonchalant.

He couldn't hide his smile.

She gripped his other hand, leaning in close.

"And what about you?"

He answered by kissing her.

* * *

It was surprising how easy their relationship was after that. It didn't seem to be hard to get used to for the others at the mansion, even Cat accepted it quickly. Hanging out together seemed natural, and they spent every night together in one of their beds.

Cat complained afterwards if they did more than sleeping in Stephanie's room, since it was the one closest to hers. Apparently they could get a bit too noisy, and this was something Cat had no trouble sharing with anyone who wanted to hear.

A few months passed, spring was slowly coming around. Stephanie would spend her days teaching, or hanging with the juniors, and Toad would be fiddling with machinery down in the garage. More often than not they'd meet up for lunch. Toad didn't seem to mind eating with the juniors, or Storm, and a few times the pair even joined Wolverine.

The CS attacks and worries outside of the protected mansion seemed to increase with every day, and very few were now allowed to leave the mansion at all. There was a war going on, some would whisper. It was nice then, to be in that protected area with a romantic interest, and she and Toad found comfort in each other.

Of course they had arguments, like couples mostly had. They often originated in Toad saying something without thinking first or Stephanie handling his delicate machinery too recklessly and accidentally breaking them.

Once Colossus had teased them during a movie night – asking them if they would be cuddling during the entire film, or something innocent of the sort. Toad had replied they weren't a cuddling sort of couple, something that pissed Stephanie off incredibly. She had stormed off, but when Toad realized he'd upset her he had followed her and dragged her back. When she had fought him he'd only laughed, picking her up and carrying her on one shoulder all the way back and then forcing her to sit in his lap for the rest of the movie. She had stopped squirming soon enough.

Some nights she would wake up and realize he wasn't in the bed, instead finding him in the kitchen working on small pieces of mechanics. She knew that meant he hadn't been able to fall asleep, but she never knew why.

It could have to do with his time at the CS, or his time with the brotherhood. It could even have to do with his childhood. He didn't talk much about the two latter, and she didn't want to force him. He found something soothing in his working with mechanics, she knew, so she'd let him be.

Going back to bed from the bathroom in the middle of the night she would sometimes stop in the doorway to watch him. He was so calm, working with fingers and hands, and quite a sight with the sparse light flowing down his bare torso. He never seemed to notice her, and she felt as if she could stare at that skin forever.

Green and muscled, impossibly scarred. He seemed otherworldly. A living war machine, but at that moment so peaceful.

_He is beautiful_, she would always think, though other people would perhaps find her crazy, and he certainly would.

And then she wondered if he'd ever get rid of his ghosts. She was pretty sure she'd never be able to.

_Two fucked-up peas in a pod_, she'd muse, before sneaking back to bed.

* * *

**Another shortie. But. The coming chapter will be not only longer but also ACTIONPACKED. What what. I'll try and be fast with that one too, since undramatic chapters like this one makes me feel guilty. It was necessary though, you'll notice why in coming chapters. **

**I hope you'll be on the edges of your seats in anticipation for the next one – shit will be hitting fan, promise.**

**- Poke**


	21. Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

**Here ya go sweetiepies. I managed to match this more eventful chapter with a busy week, so I won't be able to update for several days (at best). So enjoy this until then!**

**Story fun fact: **An incredible perk with having a main character named Stephanie is that I easily can change 'She' by going in to the word and writing 'tep' and then jumping right and writing 'ani'. I'm fully aware that wasn't even a little bit interesting but goddamit this is hard. And also I wanted to share that with you guys. I've totally used that move lots of times writing this.

* * *

Chapter 20  
**Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood  
or  
Gabriel Keller**

It had been naïve to think the world would stay idyllic forever.

Stephanie thought it bitterly, annoyed with herself and most of all the gods of misfortune. She scanned through the shelves with hectic eyes. It was just a stupid pill.

Sure, she had no idea she would be having any use of that sort of protection when she fled her apartment all that time ago, but she definitely should have been thinking about it once she'd started sleeping with Toad. It was like she was an idiotic teenager. Of course you should use protection during sex. Only, neither she nor Toad had remembered that.

_How can someone not remember that?_

He probably had assumed she was taking the pill. Everyone was. How on earth she had forgotten she wasn't taking it, she didn't know. She'd been taking them since she was fifteen, never worrying about any other protection. Her mind hadn't gotten the hang of how it only kept protecting if she kept taking them.

Thank god she'd been quick about noticing her missing period. _If_ she was pregnant she couldn't be that far along. This meant she had – options - however little she liked to think about it. With an exhale of breath she found the test.

She scanned the aisle to find something else she could take with her, if someone noticed her missing. An excuse for sneaking out to town even though no one was supposed to.  
She saw a packet of tampons and picked them up.

A pregnancy test and a packet of tampons, what a strange combination of things to buy. If you needed the one you probably didn't need the other. She decided to head for the cashier.

She was startled when she heard a voice behind her, interrupting her steps.

"Fancy meeting you here."

She twirled around towards the voice, gasping once she recognized the man. He was called Hendrickson, and he was one of many anti-mutants working beneath Gabriel in the CS.

The mere sight of him turned her blood cold, and she knew without a doubt she'd done a grave mistake leaving the mansion. She staggered backwards, items falling out of her limp hands, only to stumble into a hard body behind her.

"_We _met around Christmas. I had a hunch you'd come back. Do you remember, Steph?"

She felt something press at the small of her back, and she knew immediately it was a gun. Looking over her shoulder she saw David Juarez, one of Gabriel's closest. It was him she had seen, she reflected numbly, when they had all been Christmas shopping. She'd thought it was a trick of the eye, but it hadn't been.

They had probably been patrolling the town since then, waiting for her to come back. She knew there was no use in fighting.

"I'll come with you," she said in a low voice.

"You will," David agreed, pressing the gun harder into her back for measure.

They left the store like a group of friends, calmly, with Hendrickson and David chatting between them. There was no reason for anyone around to notice anything suspicious, and Stephanie was brutally sure she'd be long dead before anyone even thought to look for her.

She was thrown into the back of their car, and Hendrickson cuffed her hands while David made a phone call.

"We have her," he said immediately.

Even though she couldn't hear the voice on the other end of the line she was sure it was Gabriel. She felt nauseated of a sudden, her stomach cramping. This was worse than any of her nightmares. David started up the car while listening to the other person talking, taking the car out in the road.

"Yes…. Yes… We'll bring her."

Stephanie took a few deep breaths to keep herself from either crying or throwing up. Hendrickson saw her teary eyes and grabbed her arm roughly, leaning in close.

"We all heard what Gabe taught you, whore. If we're all lucky he'll let us all have a go after he's done with you. Maybe that'll make you finally get you don't fuck with us."

The car drove on, and Stephanie dimly wondered if they were heading for the Headquarters, or perhaps the former-secret building by the harbor, where they had kept Toad and Elizabeth imprisoned.

Perhaps even a new building. The harbor building had after all been compromised when she spilled the beans about it.

She had been somewhat proud, before, thinking about the mutants she had helped revealing those secrets. Now she was far too sick to the stomach to feel any of the sorts.

* * *

Stephanie didn't at all recognize the building the two men brought her into. David Juarez had taken them far away from the mansion, on roads she didn't recognize, and they ended up outside of an office complex in an industrial area, possibly somewhere in New Jersey. The drive had taken something between 40 minutes and an hour, Stephanie wasn't sure.

Hendrickson pulled her out of the car by the arm, unnecessarily roughly, and when David had gotten out of the car he joined them, grabbing Stephanie's other arm. She'd been amused if she hadn't still felt sick. What did they possibly imagine she could do? Her hands were caught in chafing cuffs behind her back and she was furthermore a particularly small woman. There was no need for two burly men to grab her arms so tight.

_They probably want to look good, _she thought. _And make me realize what little chance I have of escaping._

As they led her over the parking lot she glanced at the men on either side of her. She knew them both well from her time with the CS. Hendrickson she'd never cared for – he was a sadistic guy, and he had been unpleasant to deal with from the start.

He was one of the guys that had tried to beat up that mutant child, the time she realized she had to get out of the CS. The time that was followed by Gabriel's abuse of her.

When her eyes went over to David, she had to force herself to get accustomed to this new side of him. David had always been polite to her. He'd even been a friend; she remembered double-dating with him and his girlfriend a few times.

"How's Suzanne?" whe asked in a friendly tone, for no other reason than to see his reaction and add it to this new picture of him.

He got angry, as she had suspected. Throwing a hard look her way, jaw clenching, he muttered:  
"Don't speak about Suzanne."

Stephanie sensed a deeper meaning to his anger than her unworthiness of speaking Suzanne's name. She recalled Suzanne never had been that thrilled about the CS. Some distant relative that was a mutant, Stephanie couldn't really remember. It had been a touchy subject, silenced quickly.

Desperately grasping the chance to mock him, she said:  
"Suzanne didn't dig the murder campaign either? Don't sweat it, it's got to be some sort of female logic. Couldn't possibly be _your-"_

She was interrupted by Hendrickson backhanding her. It was a hard blow, snapping her head back like a bobblehead. Her ear on the side he had hit was ringing. The pain was manageable, so Stephanie bit back a cry and focused on the satisfaction of actually having uttered the words.

She was pretty sure she wouldn't be in a clear state of mind for much longer, and taking that opportunity to show them how she felt about them almost made her want to smile. She might have done it too, if her face didn't hurt so much.

"Don't talk about her," David said again, slower.

She winked at him, still high on the feeling of defiance.

"I can't wait 'til you've got that smug look wiped off your face," Hendrickson spat.

Stephanie stayed silent after that.

They dragged her through the door, and entered a lobby empty of people - except for a man behind a desk who was monitoring several screens with security camera footage. The men all exchanged nods when they passed.

Entering what seemed to be a conference room Stephanie immediately recognized Gabriel's form. He was standing, the way he had always liked to do during meetings, discussing something with what seemed to be a handful of CS top members seated around a table. Stephanie even knew a few of them, though many faces were completely new.

Seeing Gabriel again after all that time was as horrific as all her nightmares combined. Her fear was suffocating, and she couldn't feel any difference from when she'd first managed to escape from him, that night that was now almost a year ago. Shouldn't she have been able to put anything of it behind her?

Nauseated, she froze on the spot and the two men beside her seemed content to stop in the doorway with her. They stood silent while Gabriel finished his conversation.  
She knew he'd noticed them, even though he hadn't looked straight at them. Furthermore Gabriel had known she was coming for a long time, and he had been expecting her for the last few months. He was simply trying to make a point.

When he finished talking he at first avoided looking at her, instead meeting David's gaze. His blue eyes were colder than Stephanie had ever seen them. For a moment they passed over her face, so briefly it was barely noticeable. It made her melancholy, all of a sudden, remembering the time they had had together. But the feeling was only fleeting, soon replaced by the fear that was now so familiar to her.

The sound of his voice brought a flood of painful memories back.

"Put her in a cell. I'll deal with it later."

He was making another point, in the fashion he liked to. He was letting her know how little he cared for her now, that she was a nuisance, something to make an example out of and nothing more.

He was going to make her regret everything she had done, but he wasn't going to hurry doing it – she wasn't important enough.

He went back to the conversation, and Stephanie briefly reflected over how hard he looked. His face seemed tense, his hair was shorter. Had he always looked so cold?

Then David tugged at her arm, tearing her away from the conference room, and her thoughts.

The cell was a small room, much like an interrogation room. There were a couple of mirrored windows on one wall, and a chair in the middle of it all. There was even mattress in a corner, but David pressed her down on the chair, hooking her cuffs on the chair. It was a very uncomfortable way of sitting, arms locked behind the back of the chair, but she didn't complain. They left her then, and she was alone.

* * *

Stephanie had managed to calm herself down slightly during the hours she was alone there, but when the door opened and Gabriel stepped through it the fear was on her once more. Realizing she was alone in a room with him again made her want to throw up.

She swallowed hard, forcing the bile down in her throat.

Gabriel must have seen how frightened she was, because he was smiling.

"Stephanie, Stephanie," he sing-songed mockingly, "did you _actually_ think you would get away?"

He caught her chin with his hand, forcing her face up and staring at her.

"You will regret everything you did to us. Filthy whore."

_What's a little pain_, Stephanie tried to think, but this was all her nightmares come to life. All her ghosts – or that one specific ghost - standing right in front of her, promising her he would hurt her.

Gabriel let go of her face then, crossing his arms and looking down at her.

"But first I want you to tell me what you did at that mutant-infested place."

Stephanie stared up at him in surprise.

_Doesn't he know already?_

"I hid. From you," she said, and her voice seemed weak in her own ears.

He grunted. She wasn't sure if he had been hoping for something more.

"What did you tell them? About us?"

Stephanie's eyes fell to the floor. What had he hoped? That she would still be keeping the CS dear in her heart after everything? That she would care about him at all – after what he had done?

"Look at me," he hissed, and his calm exterior fell for that second.

She met his eyes.

"Everything. I told them everything," she said.

She wasn't sure if her voice was defiant or apologetic. He hit her with his fist across her cheek.

The pain was explosive, but not as bad as that time with the lamp. Not yet, anyhow. He hit her again, and the chair fell over.

"WHORE," he shouted at her, spitting as he did so, kicking her in the stomach. He wasn't calm at all anymore.

Her shoulder ached on the spot where she had landed on it, and Gabriel's foot hit her hipbone with force, making her cry out in pain.

The situation, the overwhelming fear, was all too familiar. She felt tears forming in her eyes, but she didn't care any longer. The pain was too immense.

In his anger Gabriel fell down on his knees and grabbed her neck, strangling her. His face was bright red, his expression a distorted mask of pure rage.

The feeling of strong fingers pressing on Stephanie's blood flow to the head called on a different memory. She gasped unsuccessfully for air, and for some strange reason could only think of that time Toad had strangled her. In the beginning, when she and him had been fighting all the time.

She had been defiant then.

Gabriel let go of her throat and her breath was ragged when it came back. When he punched her again she felt the metallic taste of blood in her mouth.

Still not being able to get the thoughts of Toad out of her head, a strange obstinate impulse made her spit the blood at Gabriel's way. It hit his shirt.

The rage after that was indescribable. When he rose to go Stephanie felt as if every part of her was broken. She was crying openly by then.

"I'll get the respect back in you," he muttered, his tone threatening.

He turned then, to leave her lying on her side, still cuffed helplessly to the chair. She was bleeding and hurting, and he was so sure he'd beaten all the defiance out of her. That though filled Stephanie with anger.

"What, you want me to heil for you?"

Her voice was week, and a loose tooth distorted her speech some, but Gabriel heard it all right. He stopped in the doorway, one hand on the handle. When he looked at her the anger was gone, replaced by utter surprise.

"Did you just call me a Nazi?" he asked.

The question brought strength to her voice. She lifted her head from the floor to stare at him.

"Aren't you?"

She could tell he was too surprised to get angry, and she recognized the feeling. She had been surprised when Toad had accused her of the very same thing – and that was after she had left the CS. She couldn't imagine the confusion for someone so caught up with the organization as Gabriel was.

He was actually dumbfounded.

"No!" he sputtered.

She had the retort on her tongue immediately.

"No?" she smiled sweetly, even though it hurt her face. "Sorry there, love."

It was ridiculous to say it, and it was the worst situation imaginable, but it was all Stephanie could do just keeping the British accent out of her voice when she continued:

"It's the part about racial cleansing. Always confuses me to think it's the same thing."

* * *

**Around Halloween I brought back a ghost. Super intentional.  
Hugs.**


	22. Slaughter

**This chapter's fun fact is put at the end and the reason is that I didn't want to spoil anything for the sweeties that actually read the shit I write up here.**

* * *

Chapter 21**  
Slaughter  
or  
An unexpected turn of events**

When he kicked her he managed to hit the same spot he had been the day before, and Stephanie let out a cry as the pain seared through her upper body. He must have been in a particularly bad mood, because he was abusing her with an untiring energy.

Maybe the thoughts of her defiance the day before had been brooding in his head overnight. Gabriel had always hated defiance.

"Whore," he cursed while he hit and kicked her, and she would have been surprised at his lack of imagination in cuss words if she hadn't been too occupied with all the pain.

Stephanie had been let out of the chair later the evening before, which she at first had thought an improvement. When Gabriel suddenly kicked her onto the mattress, where she had gotten a few hours of sleep that night, she realized that action had only made it possible for him to rape her.

She had been emotionally numb at first during the beating, but when his intentions became clear that familiar fear was on her.

When he had abused her that way the last time the scar had never left. She couldn't bear the thought of being put through it again.

"Please," she cried when he straddled her on the mattress.

He started laughing manically then, and she realized she'd only spurred him on now. He wanted to hurt her, and she had just let him know he was doing the worst thing imaginable.

He was crazy, she knew it. A sadistic bastard. She tried to push at him, but he didn't budge.

"Get off me!"

Her fear started to give way to anger. Gabriel seemed slightly annoyed by her fighting, but she still didn't have a chance against his strength. After a lot of struggling he had gotten her out of her pants, and she had managed to kick him several times, once in the face.

He was angrier than ever, but so was she.

"You disgust me," he spat at her.

She tried to hit his groin with her knee, but he managed to stop her.

"Then don't touch me. Filthy swine!"

She twisted and tore at him, putting up the best fight she possibly could. She knew he was surprised, last time she had spent more time crying then trying to hit him. The thought fueled her anger, but she still knew she had a very little chance of getting away from him.

With every movement Stephanie grew more and more tired, but she refused to give in. Gabriel had managed to unbutton his pants, and even though the bile was high in her throat she kept on struggling. She was never sure how far he would have gotten if his phone hadn't started ringing.

He seemed almost relieved, and he got to his feet quickly, kicking at her before he backed away to answer it.

Stephanie threw herself after her pants, drawing them on quickly. She wanted as much obstacles as possible for him. When she was finished buttoning them she backed into the corner, watching Gabriel carefully.

"What?!" he grunted at the voice on the other line, and waited for it to repeat whatever it had been saying.

His body stiffened, and he walked to the door. He stopped in the doorway, holding the phone to his chest and locking her eyes with his.

"This is not over," he said, dangerously slow.

He slammed the door behind him, and Stephanie ran to it to try and listen. Pressing her ear at the door, she heard his muffled voice once before it vanished behind a door or a corner:  
"I'm dealing with this personally. I'm coming right over."

Stephanie crept back to the mattress and sat there, leaning against the wall. She stared at the mirrored windows, trying to guess if there was someone there watching her. They were angled in a way so that she didn't see much of her own reflection from where she sat. She could see the top of her head, and the wall behind her.

It was probably for the best, that she didn't see her own face. It would only scare her.

The hours passed, and Stephanie spent parts of them wondering if she really was pregnant. If so, had the baby been hurt? The thought scared her, and she realized with surprise she actually wanted it. She wanted the baby, if it existed.

But to have it, she had to survive. She hoped for both of their sakes that she would.

* * *

The lights went out with a loud noise; like they had the night before, letting Stephanie know it was night time. She was tired, but had trouble falling asleep. Thoughts and pain kept her awake, and she wondered several times if any of her injuries were serious.

She must have fallen asleep, because when she looked at the door there was suddenly light streaming down from beneath it. It had to be morning, but no one had turned the lights on. Her cell was still submerged in darkness.

Of course, Stephanie had no way of telling the time. It could be really early in the morning. She tried to fall asleep again, but couldn't. The light beneath the door made it possible for her to see contours of the walls, the toilet stool protruding from one wall and the single chair, lying sideways on the floor. She waited, trying not to think about what would happen when Gabriel came back.

It took several hours for her to realize something had to have happened. By then she had moved to sit with her ear against the door, listening with all her might for any sort of sound. The place was completely soundless, and the lights had still not been turned on.

There couldn't be anyone in the building - the noises she had heard several times from people all around were completely missing.

The thought was strange – both relieving and scary. For people to have gone something must have happened to the organization. Maybe even something terrible. That thought was amazing, but she barely dared to think it.

The other aspect to it was what she focused on, and it was terrifying. If everyone had left the building, and she was the only one left, there was no way of telling when anyone showed up. That meant she would starve to death – a slow, agonizing death. Her breathing sped up at the thought.

Stephanie felt a strange wish for her pot plant at that moment. She hadn't had need for that for months. Forcing herself not to panic, Stephanie leaned against the wall. She imagined felling the cool clay against her skin, trying to relive that feeling of normalcy the plant would always give her. It was a strange thought exercise, but it managed to slow her panicked breathing down some.

* * *

Later that day, when the light from beneath the door had darkened to what had to be evenfall, Stephanie finally heard several voices. She cried out in relief then, because any voice meant that she wasn't starving to death – even if it was someone of the C.S.

When the voices got closer one stood out – and complete relief washed over her.

"Stephanie!" the voice was shouting over and over – unmistakably British.

She was crying once she'd managed to stumble to her feet. Slamming on the door, she shouted:  
"I'm here! I'm here!"

Her voice broke but she kept on shouting.

Toad found her by her voice quickly enough, and she could see his shadow from beneath the door when he stopped outside of it.

"Ye in there, Steph?" he said, and she thought his voice was shaking some, but she could have been mistaken.

"Yes! Thank god you're here!"

She felt an almost crazy happiness inside her, relief that it all was over.

"Don' worry, we're gettin ye out," he said.

She nodded, of course they were, but she quickly realized he couldn't see that.

Soon enough voices of other X-men mingled outside of her door, and Cyclops voice shouted through the door.

"Step aside, Stephanie."

She scurried to the side of the door, as far away as she could.

"I'm away!" she yelled, surprised with how strong her voice sounded then.

A red flash of light beamed through the door, across the room and into the opposite wall. The second it was gone the door fell forward, light streaming in. Toad ran through it immediately.

She cried even more when she saw him, embracing him tight even though her ribs hurt. She winced when he hugged her back, and he stopped immediately.

"Ye hurt, love?" he asked worriedly, carefully pulling her out of the room.

Storm and Cyclops stood in the hallway, dressed in full X-gear. Storm ran up to her immediately.

"Are you all right?" she asked worriedly, touching her face carefully.

"Just some bruises," Stephanie said, but she didn't really have a clue how bad she was hurt.

Toad looked more worried than she had ever seen him.

"Can ye walk? I'll carry ye," he suggested, starting to pick her up.

Stephanie stopped him.

"It's okay, I can walk. Can we get out of here?"

They did what she wanted, keeping a slower pace so that she wouldn't have to strain herself. Storm took the lead, and Toad went beside her, one hand protectively on her back at all times. Cyclops walked behind them.

"I'm sorry I'm crying," Stephanie told them, wiping at her face, "I'm just really relieved."

Storm smiled back at her.

"You have nothing to apologize for. I'm just so glad we got here in time."

Toad squeezed her hand.

They walked through the building, the same way David and Hendrickson had taken her two days before.

"Are there any others locked up in here?" Stephanie asked, though she was pretty sure she would have heard them during the last hours if that had been the case.

Storm shook her head no.

"There was only you."

They exited through the main entrance, and Stephanie spotted a large plane standing on the parking lot. The X-logo stood out clearly on the side of it.

As they walked towards it, Storm said:

"We caught up with a CS man who escaped the explosion this afternoon. He knew you were here, and Charles immediately got the location out of his thoughts. We went here right away."

They started up the few steps of stairs to board the plane. Toad supported her the way up, holding her hand reassuringly all the while.

"Explosion?" Stephanie asked.

"The headquarters," Cyclops said behind them.

They entered the plane, and Stephanie turned around in surprise to look at him.

"You blew it up?"

Toad led her to a seat while she stared at Cyclops, and Storm had already seated herself up front. The stairs folded themselves and the doors closed behind Cyclops. He shook his head as an answer.

"We don' know who did it," Toad explained, "we started th' search for ye last night, and we prepared to attack the headquarters today. Figured either ye were there, or else someone who knew where ye were. Only it blew up before we got there."

He seated himself next to her while he spoke, and Cyclops took a seat as well. Storm started up the plane, and it rose into the air.

"Blew up? Like-"

"The whole building was wiped out." Cyclops said. He had to raise his voice slightly to be heard over the engines. "All six floors. Most of the CS high-ups were there when it happened. A few hundred reported dead already. There were very few survivors."

Stephanie only sat gaping for a while as they soared through the air.

"They'll say it was mutant terrorists," she finally said.

It was terrible so many people died, of course, but Stephanie couldn't help thinking that the CS probably never would be able to rebuild itself. And that thought made her glad.

"'t prob'ly was mutant terrorists," Toad said.

He didn't sound happy, but not sad either.

"And you don't know who did it?"

"We don't know," Cyclops answered.

They were silent for a while, and then Toad picked her hand up to his lips. He kissed her fingers softly, smiling at her.

"I was worried," he admitted.

She smiled at him, the relief of being safe making her almost giddy.

"I was worried, too."

As an afterthought, she suddenly raised her voice to ask Cyclops:

"Do you know what happened to Gabriel Keller? The leader?"

She couldn't read Cyclops expression through those strange goggles he wore, but she was pretty sure he was meeting her eyes.

"Gabriel Keller is dead," he said calmly, "what remained of his body was identified by several people a few hours ago. It's certain."

Stephanie let out the air in her lungs, staring at Cyclops for a few seconds. Then she took a slow, shaky breath, sitting back in her chair. Toad studied her face carefully, squeezing her hand when she started smiling.

He was dead. She couldn't feel any sorrow, only relief. Gabriel was dead. She had been rid of her own, personal boogey man. It was overwhelming.

* * *

**We're getting closer to the end! Two chapters left, whaaat.**

**Story fun fact:** The reason the explosion is not part of this story is because it is a part of another character's story. My plan is anyway to sooner or later finish the half-written Pyro Brotherhood-fic I've got which will explain how the explosion happened, I hope I'll eventually get to it.


	23. Who Is He - And What Is He To You?

**So this took an eternity. Partly because I've been crazy busy and partly because the story is inching closer to the end and that means I have to start taking my other (Victor Creed) story seriously :( I hate taking things seriously.**

**The next chapter will be the last – and then there will be an epilogue that shows how events transpired afterwards.**

* * *

Chapter 22**  
Who Is He – And What Is He To You?  
or  
A visitor**

Toad pushed a lock of hair out of her face with a green finger. Stephanie smiled at him where she lay, right next to him in his bed. He seemed occupied with looking at her hair though, sliding his fingers lazily through it.

"I was thinking about cutting it shorter," Stephanie said, and it felt amazing to talk about something so mundane after the last few days she had had.

She changed her position slightly, wincing when she felt the movement in her rib. It was only bruised, though; Beast had confirmed none of her injuries had been especially bad. She had a lot of bruises, and of course that loose tooth in the back of her mouth, but nothing was broken or cracked. It made her sort of proud, as if staying whole had been her own doing.

Toad stared at her when she had spoken.

"Short?"

He drew his fingers through her blonde lengths once more, watching them carefully.

"Sorry, love, can' let you do tha'," he then stated.

She grinned, liking the way he was so attached to something as simple as her hair.

"All right, Mort, I'll keep it long, then."

He grinned right back at her, pulling her closer, careful not to harm her. She closed her eyes and leaned forward, brushing her lips against his.

"I hope I'm not interrupting."

The cool voice came from the doorway of Toad's bedroom, and the pair looked up, startled. The blue woman standing in it was naked, and relaxed at that. Her eyes were bright yellow and very cold.

"Mystique?!" Toad exclaimed, utterly surprised.

He sat up in the bed, and Stephanie joined him, suddenly glad she wasn't completely naked. Sure, Mystique was, but she was covered in scales. And she was pretty sure Mystique had a more laid-back approach to clothing.

She knew who the blue mutant was, of course. She had been famous at the CS, and Toad had talked about her in passing several times. Mystique was a part of the former Brotherhood, and she had performed several acts of terrorism – many of them together with Toad.

Stephanie waved one hand at her; she was an old friend of Toad's, terrorist or not.

"I'm Stephanie," she said.

Mystique gave her another cold glare.

"I know exactly who you are."

It was very clear what she meant with those words. Toad suddenly laid an arm around Stephanie's shoulders, in an almost defiant way.

"What're ye doin' here?"h asked. His tone wasn't unfriendly, but not very warm.

The blue woman only rolled her eyes at Toad's action.

"I need to talk to you, Toad, what do you think?"

He grunted unwillingly, but Stephanie nudged at his shoulder.

"Go talk with her, it's all right by me."

Toad snorted but slid out of bed.

"'s not bloody allrigh' by me," he muttered under his breath, grabbing a pair of sweatpants of the floor and pulling them on.

He picked up a plain white t-shirt from a chair and walked out of the room with Mystique while he drew it on over his head.

"We can talk in th' kitchen," Stephanie heard him say.

"Ye want coffee, Steph?" he called at her, and she called back a yes.

She fell down onto her back in the bed, listening to the two talking in the kitchen.

"So wha' 's this all 'bout, then?" Toad said, opening and closing a drawer as he spoke.

Water flushed, and when it stopped, Mystique said.

"The brotherhood is back together. It's been for quite some time."

Toad was silent for a long while. When he finally spoke, his voice was clearly shaking.

"Yeah?"

A gurgling sound from the coffee maker started.

"We thought you were dead," Mystique said, "we assumed you'd come and find us otherwise."

Toad snorted, but it sounded weak.

"Oh? Well, I assumed ye'd try and get me out of the CS experimentin' cells, n' I was jus' as wrong as ye were."

"I thought I told you – we all thought you were dead."

"Migh' as well 'ave been."

Mystiques scoffed.

"And now what? Playing house with the former CS member?"

"Oh, shut up."

Toad was obviously annoyed.

"I get it, you're the fairy tale pair – a proper Romeo and Juliet finding each other against all odds. She's going to turn you into a prince and you'll live happily ever after."

"Stop mockin' me."

Mystiques taunting voice grew serious.

"What about the cause, Mortimer? You used to believe in it more than anyone."

"I still do."

His voice was low, and full of emotion.

"What's stopping you? Her? How do you imagine you could ever get to stay with her? _Her _world will never accept you."

"_Your_ world will never accept her," he argued.

"Mort-"

"I'm used t' not bein accepted," Toad interrupted her. "I'll manage. As long as I can be with her."

There was a silence, then suddenly sounds of swift movement.

"What are ye-"

Stephanie sat up hastily in bed as she heard Mystique move towards the bedroom. Toad was right behind her, stopping her with a hand on her arm in the doorway. Stephanie stared incredulously at Mystique, who glared back.

She turned to Toad.

"Oh, let go of me," she hissed, "I need to talk to her."

Stephanie stared at her. She had no idea what the naked, blue terrorist could ever want with her. Of course, having a green, former terrorist as a boyfriend, she probably should have seen this scenario coming up sooner or later.

Toad didn't budge.

"Yeah? And wha' matter could ye possibly have t' discuss with her?"

Mystique stayed stubbornly quiet.

"Then leave," Toad said sternly.

The shape-shifter threw another hard yellow gaze at Stephanie and then tore her arm free from Toad. She stormed away.

"I prob'ly offended her," Toad muttered without a strand of regret in his voice.

But Stephanie couldn't quite shake the feeling she had gotten from Mystique's glare.

"What did she want to speak with me for?"

Toad shrugged.

"No bloody idea."

Stephanie scrambled out of bed, searching for her clothes.

"I need to find out."

Stephanie jogged out of the wing, along the hallway, wondering how far Mystique could have gotten. It was strange she hadn't caught up with her yet. When she reached the stairs she looked down them, expecting to see Mystique at the foot, but she wasn't there. Cyclops was walking down, though, and that was rather strange. She had never seen him in that part of the mansion before.

"Scott?" she asked, still puzzled, but thinking he might have seen her.

When Cyclops turned around, there was a flash of yellow in his eyes. It all clicked together.

"Oh," Stephanie said, coming to a halt at the top of the stairs.

"What do you want?" the mutant posing as Scott asked her, and the words came in Scott's voice.

She was the spotting image of him. It was incredibly strange.

"That's how you got in," Stephanie more confirmed than asked.

Mystique snorted.

"Of course."

Stephanie walked the few steps down that separated them. Mystique's yellow eyes were watching her from behind Cyclops' face.

"What were you going to tell me?"

Cyclops' face turned away, and then after a breath, Mystique's voice came from his lips.

"It won't matter what we do in the long run. They hate us all. Even more so when we kill off hundreds of them."

Stephanie gaped at the revelation. Toad had been right; mutant terrorists _had_ been behind the explosion. The new Brotherhood had.

Mystique ignored her stare, continuing heatedly:  
"All their warnings about us will be confirmed now, and people will join behind the few survivors in even greater numbers. There is nothing _we _can do."

Mystique motioned at the place they had just left - where Toad still was - with Cyclops' head.

"_He'll_ never get accepted in your world. The acceptance will never come – despite all our work – until someone of _them_- of _you - _steps forward to do something about it."

Stephanie's mind was whirring. Without warning Mystique placed Scotts' hands on her shoulders, gripping them tightly and staring into Stephanie's eyes.

"Do you understand?" she asked, and her voice was so passionate that Stephanie could feel hairs on her neck stand up.

"Yes," she said breathlessly.

Mystique nodded, and for a moment the coldness in her eyes was gone, an understanding passed between the two of them. Then she let go of her, backing away.

After turning around Mystique continued down the stairs in a calm manner, and still in Cyclops skin walked straight out through the door. Stephanie stood still in the stairs, staring after her long after she had gone.

* * *

That night she found him at his machine parts again, but there was something disturbing him, she could tell from his movements. Hectic and fumbling, his hands seemed to be shaking.

After a while his hands were shaking so bad the delicate parts fell out of them, making clinking sounds as they landed. Staring at the mess for a few seconds, he then sighed, hiding his face in his hands.

Toad stayed like that for a long time. With too much to think about herself, Stephanie left the doorway and slid unnoticed back into his bed.


	24. Good Love, Bad Love

**Here we are; sort of - but not really at the end. There will be an epilogue that tells us how things went for Stephanie - but it will be from another characters point of view. So this will be the last we read from Stephanie's. She's been a lovely character to work with, a neurotic worrier who still steps up to the plate when it's necessary. I'll miss her.**

**Because she's been through so much, and also because I'm cruel, Stephanie has one major angst-filled event to face. And this will end where it all started - in a bathroom.**

**But hasn't she gotten far since then?**

* * *

Chapter 23

**Good Love, Bad Love  
or  
The test**

It took days before Stephanie dared think of the reason she had left the mansion in the first place, that terrible day. Perhaps she had thought if she ignored it long enough, the problem would go away.

But of course she had been forced to learn, over and over, that handling problems like that didn't really work. Ignored things seemed to remind you of their existence by themselves, even though it was an ex-boyfriend kidnapping you or a period that seemed to be just _incredibly_ late.

So in utmost secrecy, bringing a small gun that Storm for some reason had gotten her (with the words '_next time you shoot them before they get the chance to touch you_.'), Stephanie one afternoon sneaked down to the village. It felt strange redoing the thing that had caused her to get kidnapped – like she was stepping into a trap all over again – and she was incredibly tense and had one hand close to her handbag at all times.

Funnily enough it was the same cashier as the last time, intensifying the feeling of déjà vu, but he didn't seem to recognize her. She put the pregnancy test on the desk, cash ready in hand, and gave it to him immediately when he had beeped the thing.

"Keep the change," she said over her shoulder, whisking out of the store the second she got her hand on the test.

Stephanie managed to get back without anyone noticing her missing, but after that it seemed like the whole mansion wanted something of her. Not even having time to go back to her room and put away the gun, Stephanie spent the rest of the afternoon talking to people and being unable to come up with a good excuse to leave.

After a while she had gotten caught in the cafeteria with the Juniors, discussing the news of the national downfall of CS- groups - news that were pouring in from every direction. She couldn't think of anything but the test in her purse during the whole time.

When they'd been there talking for about a quarter of an hour she glimpsed Toad outside through the window and decided to leave, quickly. Even though she desperately _wanted_ to be around him she couldn't bear the thought to keep a normal façade around him - carrying around her bag and its contents as she was.

She excused herself and slid out the other exit before he spotted her, half running all the way back to the east wing.  
As she entered she thanked the gods Cat wasn't there and stumbled into the nearest bathroom, checking three times to see that the door was locked.

Stephanie had tears of panic now that she finally had enough time to herself to pee on that goddamn stick. She loved Toad, she knew it, but she also knew there were no children in a future with him.

Even if she could have thought so before, her encounter with Mystique – and Toad's reaction to the news about the brotherhood - had now assured her. He hadn't given the Brotherhood up, and even though he'd stay away from them for now, he wouldn't forever. Mortimer Toynbee might accept a kid, he might even be glad for one. Toad the terrorist would not.

Stephanie sat down on the stool, her eyes stinging, and stuck her trembling hand between her legs, trying to angle the stick right.

They wouldn't last, she and him. It was only a matter of time before the call of his old life was strong enough for him to hear, and he'd go. It would happen sooner or later, inevitably_. _

_And if there is something growing inside of me?_

Then it'd be sooner.

She tried to relax, but her tense body would not do what she desperately wanted it to. She took a deep breath, forcing herself to calm down even though it was almost inhumanly impossible, and finally she could.

The waiting afterwards was even worse. She paced around as her watch ticked so slow it almost hurt; sporadically checking the door to make sure it was really locked. It didn't really matter, did it? They were over no matter what. So why did it hurt so much?

When the time was up, she picked up the stick, forcing her breath to come slower. She knew why it hurt. Even if it all ended, she'd have more time. It could take years before Toad realized he wanted the Brotherhood more than he wanted her. With a child in the picture, she'd be lucky if he stayed a single day more. She wanted those years desperately.

She heard a knock on the door.

"Steph? Ye allrigh' in there?"

She threw a quick glance at the door, angst intensifying at the sound of Toad's voice.

With what felt like every single drop of water in her body streaming down her face, Stephanie looked at the test.


	25. Epilogue

**All pictures I've photoshopped/drawn to this story can now be found on my deviantart account 'theslowpoke'. I'm slow with updating but they'll get there. Link to a fancy 'Green Politics' folder (remove spaces and ~): **theslowpoke~.~deviantart.~com~/~gallery/40786073

**Story fun fact:** this character – who I might have mentioned before – is in her very own fic that may or may not be nearly halfway done. More on that story at the end.

* * *

Epliogue**  
or  
The (second) political career of Stephanie Park**

J.C. Carlton had been only a minute or two late - and she barely missed the beginning. The stress and excitement from hurrying there had caused those prickles inside of her to stir, and she carefully stretched her fingers as she sat down in the back of the lecture hall. Small, blue sparkles of electricity emitted from her fingertips for a second, and she glanced around hoping no one had seen.

She had been wearing sunglasses, but the room was slightly dark, so she deemed it safe to remove them. It didn't seem as if anyone had noticed her, people around were still making small talk – and the woman behind the lectern did not seem to be finished working through her papers just yet.

J.C. took a deep breath and used the little time she had before the thing would start to calm herself down. She had a vague idea that if she was calm, there was a less chance of her losing control over the prickles. Thinking about them too much made her stomach stir uncomfortably, and she hoped once again she'd done the right thing coming there. At least no one had recognized her.

The woman on stage suddenly seemed to be ready, and without her even having to alert the audience of it, the crowd silenced. J.C. scooted forward on her seat, watching the woman intently from her place in the back.

"There was, as most of you in here know, a war back in the 1940's."

Her calm voice traveled easily through the big room, and the silence was almost heavy now, with everyone anticipating her next words.

"It was a devastating war; ripping nations apart - dragging the whole world into it – but when the dust the war had raised started to fall, was when the true horrors of it came to light."

When she silenced, pictures in black and white started flickering on the massive screen behind her.

"It had started with smearing and propaganda, and it ended with genocide."

The pictures behind the woman – the ones with smiling people that for some reason all had stars sewn to the arms of their jackets – had taken a darker turn. The poverty became clearer, and soon the people were barely people anymore, only skeletons. The jackets with stars had been changed to striped clothing that hung loose on their starved bodies.

The woman had stood silent for a while, looking at the faces on the wall beside her. She then turned to the crowd again.

"The prisoners in the Concentration Camps were not only Jews, but also homosexuals, political prisoners and those mentally or physically disabled. The list of people deemed worthy of the torture of the camps is long, and the deaths rose to unthinkable numbers. I speak of this tragedy – the greatest tragedy our world has ever known – because we stand on the brink of a new one."

J.C. listened eagerly: the woman was reaching the part she had come for.

"I know the numbers of anti-mutant opinions are rising in America, and I know it foremost because I once myself urged them to. When I joined the Clearance Society at fifteen it was really nothing more than a small and barely organized group of – sadist - youngsters. It grew quickly within only a few years, organizing, spreading from different acts of violence to matters of politics and religion. The group – we, I could even say, as I was part of it then – started using media to spread our opinions. Soon the whole nation could easily listen to what we had to say; and we had thoughts on anything from compulsory castration of mutants to special brands or tags that mutants could wear so that they would always be recognized. Listening to it now, it's impossible to understand how I couldn't – how people today still can't – see the connection between this and the catastrophe of the Holocaust. It's all so painfully obvious now: these organizations want nothing less than to treat people, an entire race, inhumanly – solely because of their genes!"

The words from the woman reassured J.C. more than she could have believed. She could still easily recall the panic she'd felt once she'd realized what happened to her. And she still had to keep it all a secret; her daddy would _die_ if he ever found out! She actually had no idea if he would understand or be mad, but she was sure it would have reflected badly on his company, at any rate. Most things she did seemed to.

And he would have looked at her with his serious eyes, silent, but with a look that said:  
_"Jacey… Why do you do this to me?" _and she would have disappointed him.

J.C.'s hands accidentally travelled to her lap, where the proximity between them caused a string of electricity to strike from one pointer to the other. She quickly pulled her hands apart, staring around frantically to see if anyone noticed. But it was all right; everyone was focused at the woman on stage.

The young girl watched the woman on stage once more, for a moment forgetting to listen to her words. It felt a little too much like school, in spite of the serious subject. The woman wasn't particularly old, probably somewhere in her mid-twenties, but she looked so much older than in the pictures. Of course, J.C. had only been a kid when the Clearance Society flyers started spreading, but she had seen them on the internet when she was looking her up.

Stephanie Park, which was the woman's name, had only been about sixteen or seventeen when those pictures had been taken. But there was not so much a change in her features as in her eyes and facial expressions. She had looked very naïve in those old photographs. She didn't anymore.

She'd seriously looked like a model back then though – probably the biggest reason she got to be the "face of the Clearance Society" in the first place – but she looked okay now, too. For an old person, anyway. The way she wore her blonde hair, straight and cut at her collar bones, was fashionable enough. It suited her.

About fifteen minutes into these contemplations, suddenly realizing she was missing the entire lecture, J.C. quickly sat up straighter and focused on Stephanie Park's words. She was coming to an end now.

"There are of course measures that need to be taken to make sure young mutants learn to develop and control their powers safely – but that really doesn't demand as violent measures as the ones being proposed in debates today. Through this political movement we are trying to reach a better, more equal future for this country and its laws, but meanwhile we're relying on donations to fund the education of these young mutants. If you are interested in any way, please feel free to take some of our brochures before you leave."

Stephanie Park stepped away from the lectern, exposing her gigantic, pregnant belly.

"Thank you for your time!"

J.C. felt quite shocked as she joined in the applause. She had known the woman was pregnant, but shouldn't she have delivered that baby by now? She looked like she was about to explode. That could not be healthy. And it definitely seemed like she should be helped off stage.

The woman looked almost forlorn as she reached the stairs that led down from the stage, but suddenly someone was there to help her. Stephanie Park smiled gratefully at the assistant, steadying her planet-sized belly with one hand as the red-headed young man carefully helped her down.

Once down she stopped to talk with the people that had come forward, and J.C. decided she could wait. She really had to pee, anyway.

* * *

Emerging from the bathrooms, J.C. noticed people were mostly leaving. With a slight pang of panic she realized Stephanie Park herself might have left, too. She hurried into the lecture hall, and her panic rose when she saw it was almost empty of people. She skipped down the steps as her eyes searched the room for the giant pregnant woman.

No sight of her - and it wasn't as if she was easy to miss, either. J.C. recognized the assistant that had helped Stephanie Park off stage, so she headed over to ask him.

There was a sort of after-show-feeling emitting from the group of people working on Stephanie Park's crew. They all seemed kind of relaxed, joking around a bit, content with how the thing had gone.

"Hey," she smiled at the red-head, "is there still any chance I could speak with Ms. Park?"

The assistant had given her a sideways glance first, finishing the joke he was telling his colleagues, but when he turned towards her a look of recognition seemed to come to his face.

Oh, right. She'd accidentally used her camera-smile.

"Yeah," he said, looking around somewhat confused, then quickly looking back to see if J.C. was still there.

J.C. couldn't tell if he knew her or not, people mostly recognized her from magazines, but not a lot of them could recall her name – or even the reason she was in those magazines. Young read-head was most likely trying to remember if she was an actress.

The rest of the crew had listened in on the conversation, and one of them called:  
"She's out back. You could take Mandy with you."

J.C. abandoned the read-head and headed over to the young woman that had called. She met her eyes, quickly realizing the woman was a mutant, like her. It felt odd thinking that way, but she smiled at her in spite of her own uneasiness. She was at least a few years older than J.C., and her pupils were strange, cat-like slits. The young woman smiled back.

Next to her, in one of the seats, sat aforementioned child; carefully abusing a picture of Smurfette with her crayons. Really quite the sweetheart, though J.C. never really had had any stronger emotions towards children. Too messy, all of them.

J.C. listened to the directions given to her by the woman, while the little girl started packing away her things. She must have heard the conversation and understood where it all was heading. The child was keeping her head down, absorbed in closing the drawstrings on her backpack. J.C. wondered if she was shy. Most of them were, weren't they?

When the kid was done she headed over to J.C. and caught her hand. J.C. tried not to be startled. She started walking with the small human being attached to her hand.

"What's your name?" the girl asked with a squeaky voice. Apparently she wasn't very shy.

J.C. told her.

"Jay-cee? Okay," the girl answered with a tone that clearly said _'that's a real strange name but I'm too polite to mention it'_, "my name is Amanda. But everyone says Mandy."

The kid looked up at her, startling J.C. with her eyes. Strangely enough, they were the same color as her short-cropped hair; a yellow gold. The little one smiled at her, and J.C. smiled back, trying her best not to stare too openly.

"How old are you then, Mandy?" J.C. asked, for conversational purposes.

The reply was instant.

"Three and four quarters." She looked up expectantly.

"So you're four," J.C. concluded.

The girl giggled almost hysterically. The things that passed for humor.

"I turned four last week," the girl continued, "momma got me cake. Poppa got me a pony."

J.C. looked down, interested.

"You know, I think I got a pony for my fourth birthday, too."

The girl smiled a brilliant smile up at her.

"Poppa has her with him - I can show her to you!"

J.C. wondered which parts of the girl's story were true. She had long ago forgotten the directions given to her, but the girl seemed sure enough where they should go, so she followed her lead.

They walked past some changing rooms and came to a halt in front of a metal door marked '_emergency exit'_. The kid looked up expectantly.

"Are you sure this won't set of any alarms?" J.C. asked.

The girl shook her head no, but J.C. wasn't sure she could really grasp the whole concept of locks connected to alarms. She apparently didn't know a thing about the concept of transporting ponies.

J.C. took another, astounded glance at those bright golden eyes of hers and opened the door. She held her breath listening for an alarm somewhere, but when nothing happened she relaxed.

"Told ya," the girl giggled and pulled her forward.

Stepping outside suddenly felt like entering something too intimate for anyone to see. There weren't really any of the nasties going on between the pair, only a sort of display of affection, but it still seemed like it wasn't meant for other eyes.

J.C. immediately wanted to go back in, but the girl pulled her forward.

Stephanie Park had been standing with her back against the brick wall. The mutant, leaning his forehead against hers and talking to her in a low voice, had been stroking the sides of her rounded belly slowly with his hands.

The scene had ended when Mandy in her squeaky voice had stated:  
"That's my baby sister in there. Her name's Eliza."

A small hand was lifted and her tiny finger pointed towards her pregnant Momma's over-sized belly.

The pair looked up, somewhat startled, and J.C. instantly saw where the girl had gotten her golden eyes from. The strangely green man standing close to Stephanie had eyes slightly more yellow, but the similarity was striking.

He grinned at the girl, and when she let go of J.C. and ran towards him to be picked up, he obeyed immediately.

"What've ye been up to, monkey?" the mutant teased affectionately, and the young child hugged his neck with both arms.

"I made a friend, Papa," she said with her cheek pressed hard against his.

J.C. made a sort of wave.

"This is Jay-cee," the kid explained.

The mutant nodded politely and Stephanie Park, who had placed her hand on the green man's shoulder, let go to take her hand.

"I came to see you, Ms. Park," J.C. told her as she reached out with her own hand, "and they asked me to take Mandy with me."

"Well, thank you for that. Please, call me Stephanie."

When they let go, J.C. started to feel kind of nervous. And the green guy was freaking her out a bit, though he was almost ridiculously sweet with the girl, whispering something to her as she was resting her head on his shoulder.

J.C. decided to get over with what she had come for.

"Okay… My name is Josephine Claire Carlton - and I recently found out I'm a mutant."

There was no sign of recognition in the eyes of the mutant, but a glimmer in Stephanie's eyes told J.C. the woman had probably heard about her before.

"And you're interested in what we do?" Stephanie asked carefully, with an earnest smile that reached her blue eyes.

The small girl had long ago lost interest in her new friend and the conversation, and had now started asking her Papa for her pony. He gave her a plush horse he'd been holding, which made J.C. feel stupid. She quickly looked at Stephanie.

"I know what you do," she said dismissively, "what I hear is you've got a major lack in funding."

The green man had gone quiet at her words, gently hushing his daughter and looking at J.C. with curiosity in his yellow eyes. Stephanie was silent for a while, too. Then she nodded slowly.

"You could say that," she said carefully.

"I also hear there are new mutants coming out of hiding every day because of what you do – but that there's not any room for them," J.C. continued, almost enjoying stretching it all out.

Stephanie had gone quiet now, and her face was almost stiff with held back anticipation. She only nodded.

So J.C. told them that she planned to make a donation. It was a big bite out of her trust fund – and she didn't tell them that - but it wasn't like she couldn't manage without it.

She was _almost_ positive her daddy would give her more money if she asked him nicely enough. And something in her warmed up a bit at seeing their expressions, and at knowing it was all going to a good cause.

The three of them talked through it all shortly, discussed the regular conditions and stuff like that, and at the end the golden-eyed girl had fallen asleep on her father's shoulder. He barely seemed to notice.

"I usually don't make deals in alleyways," J.C. said with a smile, "but some time's gotta be the first."  
She stretched out her hand and Stephanie grasped it quickly. Her eyes didn't leave J.C.'s face, waiting for what she was about to reveal. She finally told them the exact number and Stephanie looked like she was about to faint.

They set a date and J.C. decided it was time to leave them alone to melt it all. She headed back through the metal door, and threw a glance back at the pair.

The mutant was half-gaping, standing next to Stephanie with one arm around her shoulder, and carrying their sleeping girl with the other. Stephanie was still staring at J.C., with a brilliant smile and actual tears forming in the corners of her eyes. She was cradling her belly with her hands, and for a second J.C. hoped the excitement wouldn't cause some sort of premature labor. Then she shook the thought off and opened the door.

Feeling somewhat like a fairy godmother, J.C. winked and disappeared through the doorway; leaving the young family to celebrate in peace.

* * *

**The end.**

**There. I don't know if I did a poor job with that little cliffhanger in the last chapter - if it was way too obvious they were going to end up together anyway. But Stephanie is, after all, an incredibly neurotic woman, who overthink everything and often feels worthless – and she kept on doubting her own worth to Toad. In the end I like to think she grew more confident because of Toad. But I don't think she'll ever get rid of the worrier in her, that's just part of who she is - I'll imagine her being quite the overprotective mom as well.**

**I don't know if that's all that will come of Stephanie. The newly introduced J.C. will star in her very own fic, perhaps even two (the first one neaaarly but not really finished), featuring hot stuff mister Victor Creed. After I finished that/those I might try and do a short wrap-up story in a chap or two with both J.C. and Stephanie in it. It will probably be hard to stay away, but as you know I'm a slow, slow writer.**

**This will always be the first story I ever finished. Even though I'm already finding plot holes and bad parts, it will always have a special place in my heart. So, sweet readers: thank you dearly for your partaking in it! ****I hope you enjoyed it.**

* * *

I'll end with a complete list of the chapter names, both the song and the 'extra' name, if anyone of you would like to check up the songs. As I mentioned they all feature in Tarantino movies, and are of very different genres. Some are very good, some are very odd. All of them are chosen as chapter names because of the titles, not because of the lyrics. 'Little Green… Man' is of course meant to be the awesome song 'Little Green Bag' (Reservoir Dogs), a title I couldn't help tamper with.

Prologue _(Cleaning up)_  
1. Run Fay Run _(Sweet escape)_  
2. Can't Hardly Stand It _(A new neighbor)_  
3. Little Green... Man _(Friends making friends)_  
4. Green Hornet _(Cellulites)_  
5. Twisted Nerve _(Tequila and some of its consequences)_  
6. Stuck In The Middle With You (_Comeback)  
_7. Didn't I Blow Your Mind This Time (_Flirting techniques_)  
8. Woo Hoo _(Tequila and some of its other consequences)  
_9. Natural High _(What happened)_  
10. Jungle Boogie _(How to lose an argument)_  
11. You Never Can Tell _(Christmas Baking)_  
12. Lonesome Town _(Secret Santa)_  
13. Satisfied Mind _(Yuletide)_  
14. I Gotcha _(Before the storm)_  
15. Putting Out The Fire _(Burns)_  
16. That Certain Female _(A different night terror)_  
17. About Her _(The political career of Stephanie Park)_  
18. Foolish Heart _(Busted)_  
19. Let's Stay Together _(Labels)_  
20. Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood _(Gabriel Keller)_  
21. Slaughter _(Fighting back)_  
22. Who Is He – And What Is He To You? _(A visitor)_  
23. Good Love, Bad Love _(The test)_  
Epilogue _(The (second) political career of Stephanie Park)_


End file.
